It’s not easy being a regional TV-news reporter. You wake up every day in a panic, wondering where your next assignment will take you: Will it be a 60th-anniversary high-school reunion? A scuba-diving school for the deaf? The Russian cat circus?! And then, just when you think there are no hard-hitting stories left, a concerned parent pulls you aside at a community-board meeting and whispers one word to you: “Emo“:
FOX 11 Investigates: The ‘Emo’ Scene
Los Angeles — The ‘emo’ scene has its roots in the punk rock and goth subcultures. You’ve seen the kids; you just didn’t know they had a name. As Leelila Strogov explains, the scene has been re-shaping kid culture for some time.
While this “undercover investigation” isn’t as hilariously over-panicky as the last local-news emo report, it’s just as absurd. Among the highlights:
- Emo got big after it was “[spread] on the Internet”!
- There’s a “goth vs. emo” war a-brewin’!
- When your parents are deported, you become emo!
- This is all Robert Smith’s fault!
Actually, the last one may not be too far off.
EMO Makes The News [YouTube]
FOX 11 Investigates: The ‘Emo’ Scene [MyFoxLa.com]
Somewhere in the DC area, Guy Picciotto is telling Ian MacKaye that “now I know how you felt about ‘straight edge.’”
It’s time for the emo version of the Quincy punk episode! Let’s see…should they investogate emo-related crime on CSI: Miami or Law and Order: Special Victims Unit?
Say this for the newscast: it at least tries to acknowledge a distinction between emo kids, punks and goths. Which does nothing to alleviate the hilarity of the earnest, lip-biting reporter’s voice. Actually, hearing her talk about “emocide” just made me laugh harder.
@dennisobell: i vote L&O: CI, if only because i love seeing chris noth react to “the kids.” no bozo jam 4eva
@dennisobell: This is bigger than TV! I bet five minutes after this segment aired, every hack producer in Hollywood commissioned a script about the war between goth and emo. Joel Schumacher will direct at least one of them.
At least Fox 11 mentions Robert Smith as ur-influence when Kelefa Sanneh completely forgot to do that when he did his emo piece for the NYT…
@chrisb: It’ll be like The Warriors, only with more guyliner and girl jeans.
Of course, Pete Wentz will inevitably become the emo-General. The goths will probably get Nosferatu or The Crow or something.
Who would you bet on in the emo/goth wars? At first I thought the goths would win since they could pretend they were in The Craft and cast a spell for victory – but then again, they may not want to muss their makeup and clothes. I guess I don’t know who would win. I think this battle would be fought via Blogger, Livejournal and MySpace.
Don’t forget Facebook.
@KurticusMaximus: You just know Jared Leto would be involved somehow.
@chrisb: He’d be the Benedict Arnold of the story and betray the emokids at the critical moment to side with the goths. Guyliner and douchiness aside, you just know that guy has an Edgar Allen Poe poem tattoed somewhere on his body.
Cant we just get along??
as a reformed goth, i would have to say that the emo kids would win. they have always had more nervous pent of anxiety about their sad little lives, and could turn that into anger and rage. goths are usually too lethargic and vain to have anything to do with violence.
eww. are we really saying “guyliner” now?
@aluberalles: It’s better than “gaybelline.”
Yeah, my girlfriend and I were watching American Idol when the preview for this came on. We both looked at each other and laughed. Moving out to LA from Madison, WI, we thought the local news might, you know, cover actual news. Nope, same old cat stuck in a tree “journalism.” Great job guys.
BTW, my Blake and Jordin picks are looking pretty good right now.
@KurticusMaximus: Oh my god, an emo Warriors. Please someone write this. Instead of Central Park, it all begins at the Amoeba on Sunset.
If this was an “undercover” report, does that mean the cameraman was wearing girl jeans?
it’s razor blades vs. clove cigarettes…
Well, I think the goths would win through sheer cantankery, plus, unlike the emos, the goths have their own ‘underground’ holiday at Disney Land. That’s commercial clout right there.