Since today seems to be a slow enough news day that people will believe almost anything, let’s turn to the case of the alleged “Meg White sex tape,” which has been burning up Google since news of it first surfaced over the weekend. I watched it and am pretty unconvinced of its veracity–the necklace she’s wearing is of the letter “D,” the images are worse-than-webcam blurry, the whole thing seems to be set in a dorm room–but then again, my vision kind of sucks. (UPDATE: Meg’s publicist is saying that it definitely isn’t her in the tape.) So I turned to an ad hoc panel of semi-experts–a.k.a. “writers who are on IM right now”–and got their take (anyone who used the old “well that girl had rhythm so it had to be fake” chestnut was summarily deleted from my buddy list):
Moe Tkacik, Jezebel:
“I definitely think that Meg White is stupid enough to film herself having sex. I did not expect her to have the stomach rolls, because she seemed to be doing the celebrity shrinkage thing, but when was this allegedly shot? It’s kind of disappointing as a piece of filmography but not bad as porn goes.”
Christopher Weingarten, Paper Thin Walls editor:
“No one thinks it’s real. Indie rock people aren’t fucking stupid. (Ed. note: I doubt that VERY HIGHLY.) This is the indie-rock equivalent of having a Saudi prince ask you to hold his money for him, except you can jerk off to it. Also, only really famous people are stupid enough to tape themselves having sex.”
Matthew Perpetua, blogger and White Stripes fan:
“I really really doubt it. I mean, she’s got a recognizable face, but you know, there’s a lot of stacked girls with dark hair and a pale complexion out there making sex tapes. Maybe she’s trying to make Jack White angry, and this is her way of doing it?”
Maria Tessa Sciarrino, blogger and photographer:
“”If I didn’t know Logan Echolls was living in a swank hotel, I would have wagered this was a deleted scene from the “President Evil” episode of Veronica Mars.”
Jess Harvell, my other half:
“Zzzzzz.”
Meanwhile, the comments sections of Brooklyn Vegan and Stereogum are half-rubberneckers, half-morally outraged types who probably watched the damn thing anyway. And if you’re unemployed/”freelancing,” feel free to watch the whole thing (link to ONTD, which links to a NSFW page) and vote in our poll:
Meg White’s Sex Tape? [ONTD]
if its her, this is a really old video from when she was in college (presumably) bangin chode-y dudes in their dorm rooms.
i doubt she would get with that these days.
eww
Maybe, if only as an explanation for the cancellations. Panic/anxiety is a killer, for sure, but a lot of bands have at least a few purportedly bad shows before canceling shows. I had to go to a crap out of town baby shower, what was the vibe at the MSG shows? I remember the YouTube stuff from this Summer all over Canada or something; they seemed pretty at ease then. Eh, who knows. If it is her, I had seriously overlooked her jugs.
i can’t help but watch those things. if it’s not meg, she’s got a pretty convincing double. what’s the lesson here ladies? don’t ever, ever, EVAH let anyone film you or take photos of you during sex and/or other nakedness unless you want it on the internet. for realz.
@mplskate:
Or, better yet, just don’t date/fuck the particular type of absolute douchenozzle that would even consider posting such a thing online, with a complete and utter disregard for how devastating that would be for you personally.
I’m sure tons of people out there film themselves fucking, and relatively speaking it’s probably small percentage of videos/pics that actually find their way online.
(Oh…but if you’re famous, just don’t do it. EVER.)
It’s nice to see that I’ve graduated from “pundit” to “semi-expert” in the grand scheme of things.
If it were Meg, wouldn’t she be fucking in a better location?
Great choice for the screen grab.
maria’s comment FTW
That was marginally entertaining.
GERARD THINK WHOA!!GUESS WHO MAKE BETTER BLOG FOR ABOUT MAYBEMEGWHITE FUCK DUDE ON TAPE?! I watched it and am pretty unconvinced of its veracity–the necklace she’s wearing is of the letter “D,” the images are worse-than-webcam blurry, the whole thing seems to be set in a dorm room–but then again,…
“Your search – meg white COME ON SHOW ME HER NAKED – did not return any documents.”
Now that this has been debunked, does the convo turn to questioning the rush to post questionable porn on music sites? I’m looking at you Mr. fallen from graces blogger heavyweight that rhymes with stereodumb.
A faux sex tape scandal blows up and there’s only TWELVE comments in this thread?
I am so, so, so very disappointed in all of you.
I think it’s because this one’s flabbier (!) and grainier and more immediately outed as fake and I speak for at least two of my friends when I say–she’s the last person I want to see having sex. Actually, that’s not true–the schlub having sex with “meg” is my #1 pick for person I’d least like to see having sex. Unfortunately I just watched the whole ass-crack-tabulous thing. shudder.
@syd: Honestly, after the Fred Durst leak, it’s over. The “I’m shocked/I’m grossed out” circuitry has been shorted (though I didn’t watch this).
But hey, it alerted me to the fact that Meg White has some jugs. They’re there in every picture of her; I don’t know how I missed them.
That’s too bad about it being fake. I’d rather imagine Meg White hiding out from a sex tape than actually on the DL because of anxiety.
@MTS: To be fair, I already commented.
@OhToWant1Thing: nice!