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Last night, a few dozen UHF viewers got a little taste of international glamour at the World Music Awards, where America’s pop elite and a bunch of foreigners were airlifted to Monte-Carlo to prove that middle-aged white people awkwardly bumping asses to “Ayo Technology” transcends borders. Or something. The WMAs’ Model U.N. included winners Rihanna, DJ David Guetta, 50 Cent, Mika, and basically whoever else had bothered to turn up, but it turned out we were the real winners, because the show was really celebrating us for “buying albums and legally downloading.” (RIAA propaganda is apparently also universal.) See, we thought the real winners were lovers of exaggerated comedy accents; if you were a fan of frighteningly stern supermodels who sound like they’re hunting moose and squirrel or beefy rugby players who sound like Charo, this was the awards show for you.
The World Music Awards Prove “Smack That” Sucks In All Languages
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WOW: Guess What Adele Has To Say About Being Called Fat – Huffington Post |
 Madonna Makes A HUGE Announcement – Fox News | |
| Lady Gaga Makes Her Most Shocking Confession Yet – PopCrush | |
| Lana Del Rey's Bizarre Living Situation Is Exposed – Huffington Post | |
| SHOCKING: Learn About Chris Brown & Rihanna's Secret Rendezvous – Global Grind | |
| You Won't Believe Who Justin Bieber Is Hitting The Studio With – PopCrush |
Mr. T looks like shit.
@Camp Tiger Claw: Yea really.
Also, is that a goddman Shy Guy from Super Mario Bros 2 bringing the thump on the bass?
Is “Mr T” wearing a dish-towel fashioned like a kilt?
@Dead Air ummm Dead Air: we wondered the same thing.
At first glancing at the thumbnail of the Akon pic I thought it was Fishbone.
Shaggy would probably go to jail for fuckin’ Patti LaBelle.
@jessdolator: Clearly I’m too much of an ass to ever read.
Duely noted.
Akon, Rhianna, 50 Cent? Who knew — a WHOLE WIDE WORLD out there, apparently comprised entirely of retarded 13-year-old girls.
@KingHater: Bet you even the 13-year-old girls can spell “Rihanna” right though. Especially when it’s right up there in the post.
@lastclearchance:
Oooohhh…uh…
…Burn?