Dolly Parton Postpones Tour Due To Back Problems, Remains Folksy In The Face Of Adversity

dolly.pngAnd the award for cheeriest press release about a medical problem goes to… Dolly Parton! Dolly is taking six to eight weeks off to recover from a “back condition” and postponing her tour, which was supposed to kick off Feb. 28 in Minneapolis. Her impossibly breezy thoughts–complete with boob joke!–after the jump.

In a statement, DOLLY said: “I know I have been breaking my neck and bending over backwards trying to get my new Backwoods Barbie CD and world tour together, but I didn’t mean to hurt myself doing it! But hey, you try wagging these puppies around a while and see if you don’t have back problems. Seriously though, the doctors said I will be good as new in a few weeks, and I can’t wait to get back out there. See you soon, Dolly.”

Seems that Dolly is taking her own advice and adhering to the strict no-whinin’ policy. The rest of the press release is pretty vague about just what it is that’s bothering Dolly’s back, but one can only assume that it has something to do with Burt Reynolds’ chest hair:

Ailing Parton Postpones U.S. Tour [Billboard]

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7 Responses to “Dolly Parton Postpones Tour Due To Back Problems, Remains Folksy In The Face Of Adversity”

  1. by Dead Air ummm Dead Air at 9:48 am

    Well, that’s whack.

    Who will everyone just need to see at SxSW now?

  2. by Lucas Jensen at 10:26 am

    @Dead Air ummm Dead Air: Two words: Chingo Bling.

  3. by ragandboneshop at 10:36 am

    Maybe she was really talking about puppies.

  4. by Your GPA at 12:16 pm

    “I has seen some horrible things there, like tribeswomen with well droopy swingers.”

  5. by Lucas Jensen at 12:25 pm

    She is so awesome.

  6. by Lucas Jensen at 12:25 pm

    Even in pain.

  7. by at 12:27 pm

    I love Dolly.

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