Is Sebastian Bach the only person who can say he’s bros with Axl, or is he just the only one who goes to the press to describe how tight the two of them are? Rolling Stone called up the reclusive rock star’s former competitor and current compatriot in hopes of getting some juicy quotes about the recently leaked Chinese Democracy tracks. As Bach’s Angel Down, despite some guests shrieks from Axl, has failed to make the youth go wild, Bach didn’t hesitate to share some admittedly hilarious anecdotes, as well as cast doubt on any hopes that Axl would allow his life to be spotlight alongside those of Scott Baio and Flavor Flav on Celebreality. (”Sebastian, you don’t understand. I will pay VH1 $2 million to leave me the fuck alone!”)

When we were first hanging out in 2006, we were just standing around a bunch of people. I go, ‘Axl, do you think you might get the record out? It would be a great time, now that we’re on tour and everything.’ He goes, ‘Oh. Great! Everybody! Sebastian has a great idea here, man. Guess what? Sebastian, should I put out a record? Maybe it would be a good idea for me to put out a fucking record! Hey everybody, listen to this! I never thought of that! That never came to me! Oh, great idea dude.’ I felt like Fred Flintstone in Mr. Slate’s office.

“Another thing that I don’t know you’ll ever see is a Axl Rose reality show. When I see that shit, I laugh. Here’s the only other time that he got made at me. I had just finished shooting Supergroup for VH1. It was on TV in America while we were gallivanting across Europe. We had a beautiful dinner at some incredible Italian restaurant. We are sitting there and I go, ‘Dude, I just shot this reality show for VH1 and they paid me this amount of money, man. It was fucking easy. It was only like two weeks. It was hilarious. Axl, if they paid me this amount of money, they’d pay you like a million bucks for 10 days of some shit.’ He’s looking at me with this look on his face and he’s all quiet and he goes, ‘Sebastian, you don’t understand.’ I go, ‘What?’ He goes, ‘I will pay VH1 $2 million to leave me the fuck alone!’ I would bet my life you won’t be seeing the Axl Rose reality TV show.

Oh come on, Axl. What about a travel documentary where the two of you get to visit famous meditative hideaways and commune with ancient spirits? Judging from these quotes and your collaborations. Sebastian’s just the right kind of straight man toady to bring out your playful side.

Axl Rose’s “Chinese Democracy” Tirade: Sebastian Bach Tells All [Rolling Stone]
Axl Rose + Sebastian Bach Duo Inland Invasion [YouTube]