From time to time, we like to round up the all-important, all-summarizing last sentences of the biggest new-music reviews. Today’s entry is the new album from teen sensations the Jonas Brothers, whose album A Little Bit Longer hits stores tomorrow (and is probably causing lines to form outside your local Target, Wal-Mart, or other CD-supplying store as I type this).
• “Front man Joe has a pleasantly raspy voice, and the band somehow manages to steer clear of syrupy ballads you might normally associate with a Disney-sanctioned act of Christian rockers. Well, for the most part, anyway. The title track details brother Nick’s struggle with diabetes in slow motion, complete with tears and an unintentional nod to Joni Mitchell with the line, ‘You don’t know what you got ’til it’s gone.’ Although they attempt to wrestle with other teenage traumas, the brothers are at their best on the brilliantly mindless single ‘Burnin’ Up.’ Now if only the kids would shut up long enough to listen.” [San Francisco Chronicle]
• “Sure, lead single ‘Burnin’ Up’ is an excellent attempt at Maroon 5-style pop-funk complete with a killer Latin-percussion breakdown, and Jack Johnson will probably lightly tap himself for not coming up with ‘Love Bug’ first. But too many of these songs get bogged down in chord changes and lyrics likely to sound worn-out even to a 10-year-old. (‘You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone,’ Nick sings in the title track.) I’m sure the Jonases are worn out: These little dudes work like crazy. But though Miley Cyrus manages it on her new one, making exhaustion seem interesting is no easy feat. Pick up the phone, guys–there’s a whole fleet of Disney-pop pros waiting to help.” [Village Voice]
• “Parents will be relieved to know that the Jonas Brothers are about as wholesome and innocent a band as you can hope for these days. There may not be a ton of variation in the music, but the messages are thoroughly positive and life-affirming.” [Detroit Free Press]
Poor guys. I wanted this album to be good, but I’m perturbed that the only positive review came from ROLLING STONE (hmm…). Not as perturbed as I was by the suggestion in this morning’s Times that Joe’s moustache is intentional, but still…!
Fortunately, I don’t listen to anything the reviewers have to say. Most of the “must have” music on their list wouldn’t make my collection. I’ll continue to listen for myself and make up my own mind rather than have some person with an agenda telling me what’s good. I listened to the “leaked” cd and it makes my list and the list of everyone I know, and I’m not a teenager. Clean music that’s fun to listen to by people with positive values. What a concept!
@kjrn: Hi, Jonas Brothers’ mom.
@kjrn: I’m sorry, are you creator of “Hi and Lois”?, because you’re making me laugh.
“Now if only the kids would shut up long enough to listen.”
Uh, what? They are KIDS. Last time I checked, 11-year-olds don’t have to get “serious” about what their music means until like, high school, right? The Jonas Brothers don’t pretend to be anything they’re not, and taking an album out of it’s pop context. They aren’t marketed to you, old person.
And as for the second review, ten-year-olds don’t get tired of repetition. Were you a kid, ever?
(and is probably causing lines to form outside your local Target, Wal-Mart, or other CD-supplying store as I type this)
Actually those lines are probably for Madden…..
i love spying on the kids i babysit for (all under age 10)when they turn off all the lights and sway to the jonas bros’ slow songs. the best part?? they are so moved by it sometimes that they shed actual tears! i think that’s what music is all about when you’re a kid… it starts with sobbing along to “when you look me in the eyes” and then it morphs into driving around at night playing whatever new emo-core album you picked up at bull moose that day for all your friends. if it makes them feel something, ANYTHING, then fucking hooray for that.
I find most reviews I read to be so lame…and often coming from the burdened soul of bitter, confused (and usually male) critical souls.
Why not publish a bit from the Entertainment Weekly review? That was a bigger rave than Rolling Stone:
[www.ew.com]
Last Word: “The album really has only one true, through-and-through ballad – the closing title song, a tune Nick wrote about being hospitalized for diabetes, which comes off as surprisingly matter-of-fact and unsentimental. Several more upbeat numbers bear comely choruses that suggest they might have been conceived as ballads, but rather than simply indulge worshipful lasses who’d probably gladly sway their arms to goop, the boys can’t help but keep credibly rocking out. For that, Jonas Brothers, the parents of the world salute you…and, possibly, secretly burn copies of their daughters’ CDs to play on their way to work. B+ “
@Nunya B: Don’t feel bad for them…I’ve been reading their recent concert and album reviews with interest and even the meh, small paper reviews are more respectful (if backhanded) than ever.
@Cougarette: because entertainment weekly’s site obscured it from me when i went to its reviews page. (actually, it’s still not there! [www.ew.com] )
@Cougarette: Don’t worry, I’d gladly help alleviate any ~pain~ Joe feels as a result of bad reviews. Yes, yes I would.
It got four stars in Blender, too.
@Michaelangelo Matos: Really? Wicked!
@Nunya B: Mudwrestle you for him.
@Michaelangelo Matos: Wait. They gave four stars to that, but they give the new Portishead album a 2/5? Morons.
@DocStrange: Believe it!
The Blender piece made my head spin, but I’ll take it for the stars. It was like an Instructable on how to defend your love of the Jonas Brothers, ironically! Sigh. Hipsters.
The All Music review is also praising and Billboard wasn’t uberthrilled, but was totally reasonable and fundamentally got the point. And so far their metacritic rating is in the green (even while counting some slams and blatantly ignoring some big praise from several papers).
Just. Buy it.
@ObtuseIntolerant: I will not buy it. I’m saving up my money for the new album by Noah and the Whale. Now that looks like a good album.
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