Hey everyone, remember Buzz Ballads? The compilation of ’90s alt-rock (sorta) slow jams for the sensitive flannel owner in you? Almost a year ago I asked you to decide which “buzz ballad” was the worst of the bunch. (The winner, to refresh your memories, was Staind’s “It’s Been A While,” but there’s a reason we used the “Everybody Loses” tag on that post.) Well, those nostalgia-mongering sadists at Razor & Tie are back with…Buzz Ballads 2! Could things get ickier than Ed Kowalcyzk’s paean to placentas? Apparently yes. Join us, won’t you, in helping to decide which of the new crop of buzz bombs on this double-disc set is the worst of the worst.
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To be fair, there are some good (maybe even great) songs on here. There are also some inexplicable ones. (”Sometimes Always” sharing space with Sister Hazel?) But which one should be wished into the alternative cornfield? The answer is up to you.
Buzz Ballads 2 [Music Space]
@jfk1624: “Then I realized wanting to blow your brains out is a perfectly natural reaction to hearing that awful, awful song.”
True. Very true. Sorry you had to endure a breakup to such terrible background music.
I really don’t think most of these songs are that bad. Sure, it’s prone to the plodding soft-verse-loud-chorus-step-on-the-distortion-pedal-in-the-middle thing but they still got some good hooks and good memories for me.
It pains me that “One Thing” is what introduced people to Finger Eleven as they were once (and maybe still are) a very interesting rock band.
Also, since when is “Plush” a ballad?
My utter hatred of all things Three Doors Down prevented me from piling on the Creed bandwagon. My Home Run Derby experience was nearly destroyed this summer when they brought a stage out to the Yankee Stadium infield and these inbred fucks took the stage.
Who buys this crap?
@jopari: You were in high school when Weathered came out. How the fuck old am I?
@BigRicks: Same here. (Where were you sitting?)
How did the Eels get on that list? WTF? E is my hero. Have you read his book yet?
I vote Everclear because that song constantly reminds me of a guy I knew who blamed everything on his horrible childhood. Even after he got married and had his own children everything was terrible because his dad left when he was a kid. He, of course, loved that song.
I just think it’s a given that your parents will screw you up. Sometimes it’s worse than others - but that’s why you get to grow up and screw your kids up.
Like many others, I had to go with Arms Wide Open as the worst. While the dirgey Lovesong cover or brain-grinding Superman might be worse on a one-to-one comparison, I cannot forget the reign of terror Scott Stapp dragged us all through for multiple years. It’s like the second OJ jury; you just can’t forget that he killed his wife and that other guy.
I’ve never heard most of those songs. The only one I own is “Sometimes Always,” which is a damn fine song. Most of the others that I’ve had the misfortune of hearing are awful, but the only one I still sometimes hear in public spaces is Counting Crows, so that got the vote.
Hoobastank?
Youbastank!
That is All.
@amyk: I also voted for the Everclear song for the same basic reasons as you, except that for me, everything Art Alexakis ever does reminds me of that universal douchebag whom you have described.
Arms Wide Open is one of the worse Creed songs, but I think if you’re gonna be terrible alt-rock, you might as well be Creed.
I just want to say that anyone who votes for “Novocaine For The Soul” is officially fired, because that song rules.
Also I’m guessing that the Candlebox song isn’t a cover of one of Bruce Springsteen’s most underrated jams:
Still love both the Tonic and OLP songs.
man, i really thought hoobastank was going to run away with this.
I am, unashamedly, an 90’s alt rock whore*. That said there are some real stinkers on this release, as well as a lot of nonsensical choices: Wonderful is not only not a ballad but also possibly the worst song in Everclear’s back catalog (ok, that’s a lie, but it’s close).
I torrented the first one but only because it had a few tracks I didn’t already have. I already have all the good tracks from this one though.
*If it’s not too ambitious I’d like to claim the largest collection of 90’s alt rock singles of anyone in the Idolator readership.
I put forth my vote for P.O.D., but I’m not surprised that Creed is crushing it.
@Maura Johnston: Creed is always gonna lose. It’s a given.
I also have to step in and defend the Counting Crows’ “Round Here”. It’s an extremely honest and heartfelt song that also presents the most accurate depiction of depressed apathy of any song I’ve heard.
Plus it has an awesome funk/cheesy porno soundtrack breakdown for the bridge.
@jopari: D’oh, forgot about the Beatles’ “She’s Leaving Home” and Pink Floyd’s “Time”. Oh well, third place then.
Creed is one of the four songs out of this list I could hum from the top of my head, the others (Oasis, Lemonheads, Eels) were never going to win this.
I’m a bit shocked that there’s not more hate for that horrible, tuneless Finger Eleven song. It’s Creed-meets-Filter-meets-Staind with a frontman who looks like Aaron Lewis and Fred Durst’s child! And those lyrics!
@jopari: umm, agreed. totally. sincerely. though i once had a nightmare involving counting crows’ “daylight fading” … which is also not a bad song. man … i think i like counting crows. when did this happen. (note: the correct answer is 1994.)
@Maura Johnston: also agreed.
Also, I can’t imagine someone who’d listen to douche-rock like Creed, Staind, Candlebox and 3 Doors Down will be especially thrilled to hear Dolores O’Riordan crooning about her lover/God.
A guy broke up with me in his car when that Hoobastank song was playing on the radio and even though I didn’t like him that much I suddenly felt so awful I wanted to blow my brains out. I actually think I mourned the break up because I felt like I should mourn the break up because of the visceral effect the whole scene had on me. Then I realized wanting to blow your brains out is a perfectly natural reaction to hearing that awful, awful song.
I’m torn between P.O.D and BNL.
I’m a bit surprised that Simple Plan isn’t doing better. Perhaps the Idolator audience isn’t familiar with the song?
@Dan Gibson: Right, but: Creed, man. Creed.
@Maura Johnston: When I ran down the list before voting (and seeing the results), I said, “I wonder if anything can take the vote away from Creed.” And then I saw Hoobastank, and came close to giving them my vote. But, again: Creed. Seriously, how do you top that?
Gotta be “Swallowed” … it’s tuneless, annoying, and it was on the “American Werewolf in Paris” soundtrack.
@Audif Jackson Winters III: Oh crap, I’m wrong, that was “Mouth”, another Bush abomination.
Dear god, that is an absolutely terrible array of songs. In fact, “terrible” is not a strong enough word to describe how terrible it truly is. I will only defend “Pinch Me”, first because I’m a die-hard BNL fan (except for “Barenaked Ladies Are Me”, which is one of the worst albums I’ve ever heard- I literally listened to it once and never again) and second because it’s not really a ballad (in subject matter, perhaps, but not at all musically); “Love Song”, because it’s a pretty faithful cover of a superb song; and “Novocaine for the Soul”, because it’s a very good track, even if it’s the only Eels song I can name. (Get over it.) There are a few other tracks on here that aren’t offensively bad, but most of them are… well, offensively bad.
My vote? Creed, of course.
As soon as I saw Creed I immediately voted for it. However, I must make a confession: I actually payed money for the first two Creed albums and enjoyed them for a short period of time! Fortunately I came to my senses once I went to college but I’m still embarrassed by it. This is what happens when you live in the cultural black hole of suburban/rural America. (This revelation won’t get my commenting privileges revoked will it? ‘Cause I really enjoy commenting here.)
@Dan Gibson: ARRRGH I had FINALLY forgotten that song.
Thanks for reminding me… I guess.
@Audif Jackson Winters III: That song, in my opinion, isn’t really a Bush song; the version that everyone knows is a completely asstroucious remix (created by Rossdale himself, natch) specifically for the soundtrack of the American Werewolf movie. The song then lead to the abortion that is Deconstructed.
I love me some Bush, but they really jumped the shark when they went “industrial”.
@The Van Buren Boys: A a “friend” gave me Weathered as a birthday gift when I was in middle school. I haven’t spoken to him since.
I have to say “Swallowed,” because it’s obvious by listening to it that the band didn’t put any thought or work into it. That song says to me, “Hey, no one else playing music now knows how to play their instruments/sing on key/write interesting arrangements, so why should we? Also, we have a good-looking lead singer.” What can you expect from a band who names their second album “The Science of Things”? Whenever I hear this song it makes me want to “Swallow” Dran-O.
I voted Hoobastank.
“Swallowed” is actually the best Bush song. Not that that’s saying much.
Fuck all of you no talent wannabes who criticize these bands on this compilation of music.
First of all they did not name the title of this disc.
And second they probably put their songs on the disc to make money because most of them have none because you idiots all download your music off the fucking internet instead of buying their records or actually paying for the fucking download.
Don’t criticize someone else’s art if you cannot write the lyrics, compose the sheet of music, and produce the fucking record yourselves.
Most of you probably cannot even read music, or play something besides what you can learn by ear. Shut Up! You have no right!
And all that shit about this is a free country is just a defense mechanism to help you shield yourself from getting your feelings hurt. BooHoo!