Welcome to Idolator’s live-blogging of the inaugural Grammy Nominations Concert, which apparently kicks off the countdown to “music’s biggest night.” (Wait, I thought music’s biggest night was going to be the Presidential inauguration next year?) Anyway, join me, the Foo Fighters, Celine Dion, Taylor Swift, and John Mayer and B.B. King (oh boy that is going to bring out the crankypantses) after the jump.
8:57 p.m. Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer is just finishing up. This is an odd night of programming for CBS: Prototype Claymation, then this Grammy thing, then Heidi Klum’s boobies via the Victoria’s Secret “Fashion” Show. What sort of person would watch all three? A horny 15-year-old with a secret Taylor Swift fetish?
9:00 p.m. Ooh, a perfume ad with Gisele wearing no clothes! I guess if nothing else will keep people tuned in…
9:01 p.m. I am following The Grammys’ Twitter feed as well, in hopes that it inadvertently breaks a story.
9:9:01 p.m. Mariah Carey opens with “a holiday classic”… but it’s not “All I Want For Christmas Is You”?!?! Perhaps “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” will segue out of it?
9:02 p.m. A shot of the audience reveals… a lot of confused people. Also, why are all the backup dancers wearing fur-trimmed shopping bags?
9:03 p.m. Oh, poor Mariah’s voice is all blown out. I guess after, what, 18 years of octave jumping, something had to give. HOW DID THEY NOT DO “ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU” THOUGH. I MEAN SERIOUSLY. Sorry, that song is too good to be ignored.
9:04 p.m. Ah, here come the sponsor shout-outs! Staples! Nokia! That Grammy museum! When you hear the word “Grammy,” you expect great music!
9:05 p.m Taylor and LL are tripping over the TelePrompTer a bit. Uh oh, tonight’s apparently going to feature a lot of “classics” being performed.
9:05 p.m. BEST NEW ARTIST! Ne-Yo looks suave as always. The nominees:
9:06 p.m. Wait, what? The Beatles? Oh, OK—it’s an intro to the category. Sure. The Grammys would like you to know that they are very pro-Internet! Look, there’s even a lingering shot of MySpace Music’s “Buy” Button!
OK—BEST NEW ARTIST NOMINEES
Adele
Duffy
The Jonas Brothers
Lady Antebellum
Jazmine Sullivan
No Katy Perry nomination! Ne-Yo brings the good news!
9:08 p.m. So, I was two-for-five on the Best New Artist nominees. No Leona Lewis nod seems kind of odd, doesn’t it?
9:09 p.m. Ha ha, A-Rod. I’m calling the odds that Madonna’s name is mentioned during the next 51 minutes at 10-1.
9:10 p.m. Oh man, here comes LL Cool J interviewing the Jonas Brothers. I guess having Taylor Swift chat them up would have been too awkward….
9:11 p.m. LL Cool J on the Jonases’ nomination: “Always glad to see some brothers make it.” Uh…
9:12 p.m. Celine Dion sings Janis Ian. Seriously, Grammys?
9:12 p.m. Celine has apparently tried to curb her multi-octave tendencies by sticking multiple marbles in her mouth.
9:13 p.m. When she is done singing, Celine is going to ask everyone in the audience to tip their waiters. In French.
9:14 p.m. Seriously, Grammy committee, putting people to sleep was probably not the way to go. Couldn’t you have at least had Celine sing some Jethro Tull or something?
9:15 p.m. I’m now imagining the discussions that brought us to this performance. “Well, we really don’t want to alienate the NCIS demographic.” Is it really a Celine performance if it stays within an eight-note range?
9:16 p.m. Oh, now she’s announcing the Album Of The Year nominees!
ALBUM OF THE YEAR
Alison Krauss & Robert Plant, Raising Sand
Coldplay, Viva La Vida
Ne-Yo, Year Of The Gentleman
Lil Wayne, Tha Carter III
Radiohead, In Rainbows
9:18 p.m. Lots of surprises tonight already! No Katy? No Leona? No Eagles? I’ll sit through Celine for any of that.
9:21 p.m. We’re back! And so are the Foo Fighters, who are “updating a ’70s classic.” That classic is “You’re So Vain.” How inspired by Faster Pussycat will this version be?
9:22 p.m. Those of you who don’t have to listen to this performance for professional reasons should take in this previously referenced, way superior version:
9:24 p.m. OK, so this song is unimpeachable, but this version is odd. Also oddly mixed. Again with the problem of mixing music for television. The guitars sound like they’re being amped toward my living room’s opposite wall. Why? Shouldn’t we be past these sorts of problems?
9:26 p.m. Cut to the Jonas Brothers wondering, in sync, “who are the old guys?”
9:26 p.m. So the whole “performance leading into nominee announcement” thing is a bit awkward, although I guess that’s what is making up for the lack of acceptance speechers. It’s time for the nominees for Pop Collaboration With Vocals, with a special cameo by that Elton John/Eminem performance of “Stan” and that weird bit where Natalie Cole sang with her dead dad via transdimensional satellite!
POP COLLABORATION WITH VOCALS
Alicia Keys and John Mayer, “Lessons Learned”
Madonna, Justin Timberlake, and Timbaland, “4 Minutes”
Robert Plant and Alison Krauss, “Rich Woman”
Rihanna and Maroon 5, “If I Never See Your Face Again”
(Grohl just shook his head. Yeah, that song was kind of a stinker, no?)
Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown, “No Air”
But wait, there’s more! Dave Grohl is hunching into the mic and looking kind of embarrassed!
COUNTRY PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP
Brooks & Dunn, “God Must Be Busy”
(Grohl’s putting on a twang here.)
Lady Antebellum, “Love Don’t Love Here”
Rascal Flatts, “Every Day”
The Steel Drivers, “Blue Side Of The Mountain”
(The twang’s getting more pronounced.)
Sugarland, “Stay”
And now he’s saying it’s an honor to just be nominated. Yeah, tell it to the guy on Top Chef you sent home last week, Dave.
9:30 p.m. OK, so here comes Christina Aguilera singing “(I Love You) Porgy.” Again, a bit of a mellow choice. Why am I not drinking a martini?
9:33 p.m. Then again, it’s nice to hear her not blowing out her voice to next week for once. She has really great phrasing.
9:34 p.m. Taylor Swift is announcing the Best Rap Duo Or Group performance… after the break!
9:38 p.m. “My co-host wasn’t released for another 30 years,” LL Cool J says of Taylor Swift.
9:38 p.m. Taylor Swift is singing about collect calls! And giving her ex-Jonas a lot of LOOKS, it seems like.
9:40 p.m. And here comes the segue into her new single! She’s the only one who’s been able to do this so far, I should point out. The host’s prerogative?
9:41 p.m. Last week, she sang this song in a throne; this week, it’s on a very well-upholstered stool. And she is singing right into the front row, still. Think a seat-filler’s sitting in the seat she is aiming at right now?
9:42 p.m. Oh, this super-white announcer guy just said “the poetry of the street.” And now the package has Ashanti in it. Sigh.
9:42 p.m. They “continue to keep it real,” like Kanye West and his marching band.
BEST RAP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP
Big Boi feat. Raekwon & Andre 3000, “Royal Flush”
(Taylor couldn’t pronounce “Raekwon” quite right. Aw.)
T.I. feat. Kanye West & Lil Wayne, “Swagger Like Us”
Lil Wayne feat. Jay-Z, “Mr Carter”
Ludacris feat. T.I., “Wish You Would”
Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West, “Put On”
9:46 p.m. Aw, poor Usher, relegated to the much higher rated show with the boobs.
9:47 p.m. Not to quibble with my local cable company ad, but I think those transparent phones with the brightly colored innards were more of a late-’80s phenomenon.
9:48 p.m. Taylor Swift: Much taller than Neil Portnow. Will he go off on illegal downloading? No, he’s letting you know that all 110 categories are able for perusal at Grammy.com in 12 minutes! Taylor Swift, ever the pro, says she’s going to look at the Web site right after the show. On her BlackBerry, no doubt.
9:49 p.m. B.B. King and John Mayer are now letting the good times roll. Can you guess what song they are collaborating on?
9:50 p.m. The Jonas Brothers are authentic blues fans, I bet.
9:52 p.m. Some fierce guitar face going on here.
9:53 p.m. Standing ovation. Of course. And now, the Record Of The Year nominees. Like “Smooth”! Remember that, you guys?
RECORD OF THE YEAR
Adele, “Chasing Pavements”
Coldplay, “Viva La Vida”
Leona Lewis, “Bleeding Love”
M.I.A., “Paper Planes”
(!!!!!!!!)
Robert Plant and Alison Kraus, “Please Read The Letter”
9:55 p.m. Not that it’s ever going to happen, but if “Paper Planes” wins Record Of The Fucking Year, I swear I will never make fun of the Grammys again.
9:59 p.m. Wait, that’s it? Only six categories and lots of John Mayer? I’m still sad about there being no “All I Want For Christmas Is You,” but oh well. Time to go look at all the nominees!
Um, also?
BEST ELECTRONIC/DANCE ALBUM
Brazilian Girls, New York City
Daft Punk, Alive 2007
Cyndi Lauper, Bring Ya To The Brink
Kylie Minogue, X
Moby, Last Night
Robyn
!!
BNA: No Katy Perry! Thank Jeebus!
@tigerpop: But wait.. does this mean she’s not going to go away?
@Maura Johnston: Ugh. Guess not.
On the bright side, looks like you all but nailed the AOTY noms.
@tigerpop: Yay me!
@tigerpop: And yay Ne-Yo. That album is so, so good.
@Maura Johnston: Yay for no Alicia Keys!
I love Dave Grohl, but this fucking sucks.
Can I get a FUCK YEAH for the Jonas Brothers? Just me?
Even if it is an audience pander and they won’t win it but I’m psyched, anyways. Good call, Rob, wherever you are!
@ObtuseIntolerant: hey, you never know
@Maura Johnston: that was supposed to have a new york lottery joke within. alas.
is this really live in la? was the tree lighting in ny live also? so how did the jonas brothers appear on the east and west coast within a 1/2 hour of one another? did they play in la and nbc just broadcast that performance from la? confused?
What will Taylor Swift sing???
Oh my God - she is awful…
she is awful…that is too bad
@Maura Johnston: Oh,no! I see it, I see. Heh.
Five AOTY nominations that I actually liked? Weird.
Plant and Krauss have AOTY sewn up, pretty much.
At least it’s not Herbie Hancock.
I think for one year they should try getting normal people announcing these noms. The artists announcing them look and sound like stoned puppets. And I predict Young Jeezy will get his first Grammy, “Put On” is one of the best rap songs this year.
@ghostyhead: Yeah probably, but it could be Coldplay’s year too. I’d like to bet on Radiohead, but the digital release of “In Rainbows” was such a subversion of the industry that the Grammys probably gave ‘em the nom just to fuck with them.
HOLY FUCK MIA FOR ROTY?!
I knew M.I.A was big but who let the Academy know about her?
@tigerpop: I’d be OK with Coldplay or Radiohead. Hell, they’re all actually pretty good for a damn change. And yeah, Maura, I’d love to see Ne-Yo win out! I just think the same old fart vote that swept in Hancock last year will give it to Plant & Krauss.
I’m just trying to remember the last time the album of the year award went to an artist/band that debuted in the 90s. Was it Outkast?
ok the m.i.a thing is huge and the best rap performance by duo or group is the strongest category top to bottom i’ve seen in years, but can we just talk about daft punk receiving a nomination for best dance recording for “harder better faster stronger”, a song that came out 8 years ago??? i mean, they included the version of the live album but still…
The Jonas Brothers ARE authentic blues fans, Maura. Their step-grandfather is a one-legged black blues singer named Bayou Butch Lucas. I am not making this up.
M.I.A. better show up all pregnant and bum-rush the stage when she loses to Leona Lewis. I’d tune in for that.
Robyn also got nominated for a Grammy in the same category as Cyndi Lauper and Kylie Minogue(Best Dance Album), which makes me unreasonably happy. Unfortunately I am sure the Daft Punk live album will take the prize.
Also unfortunate: Lady GagMe’s inclusion on this list. I hope she ODs on drugs for her “art” or something; she can’t get out of the public eye fast enough.
@ObtuseIntolerant: I am sorry I am such a dork. I am pleased. I am even really pleased for M.I.A.’s triumph and she irks me!
Also, where is Santogold? I would have thought the Grammys would eat her up.
@ObtuseIntolerant: I’ll second that FUCK YEAH!
@walkmasterflex: I would have liked to have seen an LCD Soundsystem track in there instead.
Wait a second Maura, were you watching Rudolph instead of “Pushing Daisies”? Why am I the only person in the world not watching Pushing Daisies?
@Nunya B: If there is any justice in the world, she will lose to Hot Chip.
@DocStrange: watching “Pushing Daisies” rather. Shit, I need coffee.
@DocStrange: i don’t watch ‘pushing daisies’ — i watch way too much tv as it is and i am wary of starting in on a show that is not a law & order spinoff or a magical elves production.
@Maura Johnston: Fair enough. Besides most people didn’t watch it after the first episode because it was so excellent that it would almost certainly be cancelled and why bother getting into a show that’s only going to break your heart when it gets cancelled anyway? But I stayed on. And now my heart is broken. Worth it, though.
@DocStrange: I was watching “Pushing Daisies”. Love that show. Also very sad that it’s being dropped. I hope they get Chuck and Ned together before the end.
I thought Taylor Swift was performing in Grease in Providence last night?
Oh, wait. Ha ha ha.
I have a total inability to distinguish people named Taylor.