Not Directly Music-Related, But Still Kinda Relevant Dept.

So much for orange tongues holding your memories of late nights, everybody: “MillerCoors agreed to stop selling Sparks, a caffeinated alcohol drink, as part of an agreement Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan announced Thursday.” But wait, it gets worse: “MillerCoors will also cease marketing campaigns that appeal to underage youth, like its sponsorship of professional air guitarist William Ocean.” Oh, great. Now what are the young air guitarists practicing in their basements going to aspire to? [St. Louis Business Journal; HT Dan C.]

 
Sorry, there are no Video results for this search.
... everybody millercoors agreed to stop selling sparks a caffeinated
Sorry, there are no News results for this search.



 
  1. Lucas Jensen  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    I might have already told this story here, but my coworker Jon and I didn’t know what Sparks was a few SXSWs ago, and they were free, and we each drank, like, four. They tasted like Sweet Tarts! I thought my skeleton was going to jump out of my nostrils. Sparks does sponsor a lot of cool, free shows here in Athens. So does Camel!

  2. Maura Johnston  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @Lucas Jensen: not anymore!

  3. moomintroll  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    Aww, Sparks-tongue was the only thing that made the Pitchfork Festival amusing this year. (Well that and Jarvis)

  4. MayhemintheHood  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    So many kids in Silverlake are bummed right now. I always hated Sparks, never understood it’s appeal to the young, cool kids. It tastes like shit and makes you look like you have jaundice.

  5. Maura Johnston  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    i wonder if i should add a ‘miss u’ tag to this post.

  6. El Zilcho!  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    Stupid underage kids, they ruin all the fun.

  7. baconfat  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    I was a huge fan of Sparks until I found out it was part of the MillerCoors family. But I was really looking forward to just one night with a grip of the announced-then-shelved Sparks Red for old times’ sake, which I suppose will never happen now.

  8. T'Challa  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @Lucas Jensen: Man, it sounds like we might have been at the same Vice party at that SXSW you mentioned. It was also the first time I’d ever had the stuff, and probably quaffed just as many if not more (my fuzzy recollection is around five).

    My friends and I stayed up the entire night, watching the sunrise from the hotel balcony, buzzed out of our brains. But totally wide awake! And I will always have love for Sparks because of that night…

  9. Bob Loblaw  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    “Get out of my rock-related pantomime fantasies, get into my car.”

    -William Ocean

  10. NeverEnough  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @Maura Johnston: Yes!

    Since I got pregnant, both Sparks and Zima have gone out of business. DAMMIT! I’m wondering if I should rush out and stock up on some now– big belly and all.

  11. Jess Harvell  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    haha i am so mad (”mad”) that gawker beat me to a corny-ass “when they came for zima, i did not speak up…” gag.

  12. RaptorAvatar  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    Few other beverages were as conducive to my lifestyle as Sparks. Mourn ya til I join ya, borderline toxic fit of transcendance. Now, who wants to help me make Cisco the next hipster drink?

    @T’Challa: @Lucas Jensen: That’s exactly why they got rid of it. You guys are just like the kids who ruined acid by thinking they could fly.

  13. Jess Harvell  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    [www.rum.cz]

    this should be the “new thing” in novelty cocktails.

  14. MayhemintheHood  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @RaptorAvatar: You had to pick one of the few beverages that tastes worse than Sparks. I wish I could join you on that one. How about hipsters just do coke/amphetamines while drinking regular booze, like normal people.

  15. Lucas Jensen  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @MayhemintheHood: Cisco is the pits. I like Joose.

  16. Anonymous  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @MayhemintheHood: Because cocaine is expensive and doesn’t remind me what a huge dork I am.

  17. Lucas Jensen  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    What’s gonna happen with Drank?

    [www.drankbeverage.com]

  18. Anonymous  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    I’m seriously stocking up. I love the stuff. You’re flying high and feeling dangerous for just a few bucks. Can’t beat it.

  19. ghostyhead  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    Seriously, it’s liquid cocaine, only much cheaper and legal.

    Damn kids ruining everything!

  20. T'Challa  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @RaptorAvatar: well, if laughing like loons with your friends over the varying degrees of orange everyone’s tongue has turned while rifling through the bottomless bag of SXSW promos is a bad thing, I don’t want to be good!

    PS: No one was harmed in the making of this Sparks-induced memory…

  21. T'Challa  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    @RaptorAvatar: The only difference being that on Sparks, you CAN fly!! Just watch…

  22. Tauwan  |   Posted on Dec 18th, 2008

    Guess I’m going back to Night Train.

    Damn…

  23. I can’t take these drinks, they’re just far too harsh on me. You get so much more drunk because of all the energy rush that comes with it. I always skitz out and need something to relax with afterward.

Leave a Reply

Sign In Login