Gene Simmons Will Not Let Me Rock And Roll All Night (Or Party Every Day) With Him

noah | January 27, 2009 2:00 am

Kiss bassist/serial entrepreneur Gene Simmons got wind of yesterday’s post about his all new Canadian-artists-only record label, and he is not pleased! He took to the blog of his recently relaunched Simmons Records and went off, calling the person who penned it (a.k.a. me) “an amateur who’s achieved nothing in his [sic!] life” and saying that soon enough, I and my ilk would soon be sent “back to [the] fish wrapping factory they escaped from.” (NB: I am writing this from my parents’ house, so maybe he has a point.) But then, in a frenzy of whipping up Canadian nationalism and not linking to our site (ahem), his threats got even worse!

We’re going to find, develop, nurture and launch new talent emanating from — CANADA!!!. That’s right, Baby.

Why here?

Because you actually DO have the talent.

And now, you have a WAY.

ME.

Send us you electronic demos. (Read above how.).

Oh, and the asshole who posted the story? He gets no free tix, no backstage passes, and therefore, he won’t have access to our parties and our girls.

No access to his girls! As if I didn’t need enough reasons to quit this business already.

Simmons Records [Official site] Kiss frontman Gene Simmons looks to sign Canadian bands to Simmons Records [Canadian Press]