Top 5 Things We Can Expect To See In The Michael Jackson Cirque Du Soleil Show

Michael Jackson’s songbook is not only being turned into a Cirque Du Soleil show, but two Cirque shows (one a traveling concert, one a permanent show in Las Vegas). But why stop there? The productions will also come with their own reality show about the search for a choreographer, to be titled So You Think You Can Dance On Michael Jackson’s Grave? (Reminiscent, of course, of this pretty accurate dramatization from Best Week Ever.) But what to expect from these MJ Vegas shows? Our Top 5 guesses after the jump:

Top 5 Things We Can Expect To See In The Michael Jackson Cirque Du Soleil Show

5.All the animals from Michael Jackson’s zoo at Neverland will be played by homoerotic Cirque performers. An actual monkey will play Bubbles.

4. The entire stage will be turned into the surface of the moon and rotate so that all the performers will moonwalk in unison.

3. That awesome anti-gravity dance move from “Smooth Criminal” will become an entire set piece of scary French-Canadian clowns leaning at at abnormal 60-degree angle while asking “Annie, ça va? Ça va? Ça va, Annie?”

2. A giant Orca whale will jump over the audience Free Willy-style during “Will You Be There.”

1. The cast of The Beatles’ Love will duet with the cast of the MJ Cirque show in a rousing cover of “The Girl Is Mine.” Then the daughter of Viva Elvis will marry the MJ Cirque show and kiss awkwardly on TV.

Here’s a trailer to whet your appetite til 2011 (don’t be too excited, it’s just randomly cut together footage of Michael Jackson and acrobats from previous Cirque performances):