Taiwan aired a computer-animation on one of their news programs to dramatize all the different ways the Internet has turned on web-raised pop cupcake Justin Bieber this past year. Apparently, we somehow missed the story about Bieber going to an STD clinic and flying through his windshield without getting a scratch on him. If there was ever a definition for “WTF”, this is it. Catch up on Bieber’s alleged exploits in animated form below!
So, according to this animated news report, Justin Bieber did the following things:
–began his singing career while still in utero
–made two teen girls and one teen boy swoon while performing on a bare unidentified stage
–crashed into a fire hydrant while driving a car (while not wearing his seatbelt!)
–had a burst of light shoot through his teeth while giving the peace sign to tweens who took photos of his lifeless body
–Googled “Justin Bieber syphilis” as though he were Jack Torrence in The Shining
–went to an STD clinic, followed by a disgruntled experience of seeing his mother in a MILF porn magazine
–YouTube’d a porn called Teenage Wet Dream starring himself, to his shock and disbelief!
–danced on stage with Kim Jong Il wearing a sweater vest and two police officers
–yell at a girl on the street and quite literally burst her bubble
–get attacked by an emo band (or is that supposed to be the Jonas Brothers?)
Okay, the most unbelievable thing about this animated news report is that Twitter looks ABSOLUTELY NOTHING LIKE THIS:
Since when is Twitter the new Ask Jeeves where you type a random question to get an answer to a extremely specific question? This news report has just been discredited by this appalling example of misinformation! The rest of it is completely 100% accurate.