John Mayer happened to come across a Huffington Post article in which it was reported that he and ex Jennifer Aniston may be dating again. Mayer isn’t exactly a shy guy, and instead of shrugging it off as another inaccurate gossip story about his love life, the singer responded via an incensed Tumblr post. Don’t get John Mayer angry! You wouldn’t like him when he’s angry!
Here’s the quote HuffPo originally posted:
“I believe in second chances!” [Mayer] said. “You might have been a pain in the ass the last time around, but you can still start over again from home base. Next time you get a text from the one you love just text back ‘come over’ – no matter what happened in the past. If you really love someone, just tell them and be with them.”
According to Mayer, the above quote is “fabricated” and “misleading.”
“Huffington Post, this is reporting?” he begins, just getting started. “How do you pay your writers now, in Silly Bandz? Do you meet your sources in a malt shoppe?”
“I don’t think I ever said ‘I believe in second chances!’ but I can’t be 100 percent sure, as it’s possible I could have accidentally said something succinctly and to the point,” he continues. He then explains that the next two sentences in the quote are pulled from two different songs, “Half Of My Heart” and “Edge Of Desire”—both of which were performed at two different points during his Hollywood Bowl concert.
But oh, there’s more!
“The reason I’m calling you out instead of all the other magazines that make stories up out of thin air is that In Touch and Star Magazine aren’t concurrently writing pieces about Pat Tillman or WikiLeaks. Those other rags know who they are, and even if they’re obnoxious, I’d rather have to live with them because they (and the rest of the world) know where they stand, which doesn’t make them one tenth as dangerous as you are. You’re a stripper wearing reading glasses. Or maybe you’re an insolvent law student willing to dance for a few extra dollars. Either way, it’s uncomfortable to watch you try to wrap yourself around a pole when you have that C-Span scar.”
He ends his biting post by suggesting how they may update their story with his response and a new headline: “JOHN MAYER SLAMS HUFFPO: ‘GO F**K YOURSELF!’”
HuffPo updated their article with Mayer’s retort, along with an update that “the first quote mentioned in the original post was not initially attributed as it should have been,” and that it originally came from a site called the Express, a U.K. news outlet.
We’re not always on board with what comes out of John Mayer’s mouth—sexual napalm, anybody?—but good for him for speaking up when a news agency gets it way wrong. Maybe Mayer should go bitch at the people at the Express, too. He can send them a link to this video!