Well, that was fast, wasn’t it? According to a tweet last night, Taylor Swift has already returned to the studio to write her latest blistering break-up anthem, this time about her break-up with Harry Styles. (Unless we missed one, which is possible.)
But that’s not all we’ve missed in the last day of Swift news — no, the country-pop chanteuse has had some other drama brewing up, too. There’s antiques drama! There’s fake #Haylor breakup song drama! Did we mention the antiques drama? Head below to see the latest news from the Swift news cycle.
1. Taylor Swift is still eviscerating dudes in her songs, probably!
Last night, Swift tweeted the following:
Back in the studio. Uh oh…
— Taylor Swift (@taylorswift13) January 10, 2013
Gulp. Sure, it’s possible that her “Uh oh…” is innocuous, but the likelier scenario is that she’s going to rip Styles a new one. Hell hath no fury like a Swift scorned.
2. Taylor Swift is highly principled, and also loves antiques!
Normally we steer clear of tabloid trash, since it’s mostly mean-spirited fabrication and speculation, but man, this report from RadarOnline is a gem. An “insider” (who are all these insiders, anyway?) claims that Styles dumped Swift because she’s “asexual and wouldn’t put out,” and also that he was alienated by how she’s a homebody and only talked about antiques. Staying at home, not having sex and talking about vintage rolltop desks? That sounds like our dream relationship. Have fun with your fast-paced lifestyle, Harry. Bye.
3. Apparently, Taylor Swift’s signature musical style is replicated fairly easily!
Last night, a rough recording of a girl who sounded just like Swift singing a song very clearly about the breakup with Styles started circulating on Tumblr; turns out it’s the work of SoundCloud user jerseygreenII, who wrote it as a “Taylor Swift break-up song foretell.” (Apparently, that’s a thing.) It’s actually pretty convincing — especially the line about singing Stevie Wonder over the phone, which might be the most Swiftian line ever sung by someone who’s not Taylor Swift. But alas, we’ll have to wait until the next album cycle to hear Styles get properly demolished in a set of lyrics. Listen below: