The Jacksons: A Family Dynasty—a six-episode series that will chronicle the efforts of Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, Marlon, and Randy to embark on a reunion tour, which was shelved by producers but revived after the June death of their brother Michael—will debut on A & E on Dec. 13. Because what better way to gear up for the holidays than to watch the adventures of a dysfunctional family trying to get its livelihoods back, right? Sigh. [AP] MORE »
POSTS FROM "The post-dignity era" CATEGORY
The post-dignity era
The Jacksons’ American Dream Reaches Its Inevitable Conclusion
The post-dignity era
Oh, Paula, Vh1’s People Sure Were Cold-Hearted Snakes To You Last Night
Last night’s star turn by Paula Abdul as the host of Vh1 Divas was full of bad references to Abdul’s recent American Idol past, including an extended turn in which Abdul donned a blond wig and used her dancing skills to mock the way her Idol replacement Ellen DeGeneres enters on her talk show… only to take back any parodic intent almost immediately after the lengthy aisle-dancing segment was finished. Oy. Clip after the jump. MORE »
The post-dignity era
Bobby Brown Guesses That He’s Going To Have To Take Control (Of His Weight)
Alternate Ghostbusters II-inspired titles for a post about deposed New Jack King Bobby Brown allegedly joining the cast of the upcoming season of Celebrity Fit Club, so I can soothe the pain of a TMZ-sourced “news” item with the fierceness of that movie’s signature song “On Our Own”: “Bobby Brown Decides He’s Too Fat To Handle, Too Cold To Hold”; “Bobby Brown Joins The Weightbusters”; “Bobby Brown Sad To Find Out That Cake, Despite Being Delicious, Is Almost As Evil As Vigo”; “Bobby Brown Tries To Battle The Bulge (It’s Not Legal).” (There were also a few possibilities for an “Every Little Step”/treadmill joke, but I figured that might be a little too much reaching.) [TMZ / Dailymotion] MORE »
The post-dignity era
Nine People Have Already Put The Michael Jackson Memorial Service’s Program On eBay
The highest bid for the commemorative booklet sold in conjunction with Michael Jackson’s just-completed memorial service as of this writing: $290. Note to self: Putting “GOLD!!” in the header of future quick-cash-in auction listings will vault you right to the head of the auction pack in those first heady moments.
jackson memorial program [eBay] MORE »
The post-dignity era
TMZ is saying that the purported Michael Jackson autopsy results breathlessly revealed by the UK tabloid The Sun today are fake. Or, to be more specific, they’re “fabricated and completely false.” Yep, that’s where we are right now: A leak slapfight between TMZ and British papers that feature boobs on page three. The aftermath of Jackson’s death is going to open up a new, unbelievably gross chapter in the tabloid wars, isn’t it? [TMZ] MORE »
The post-dignity era
David Archuleta’s Stage Dad Gets Directed Into A Prostitution Investigation
What the h-e-double-hockey-sticks is this? Jeff Archuleta, the father of 2008 American Idol runner-up David, has been named in a police raid of a “massage parlor” in Utah (Utah!) that was apparently offering happy endings to its clients. The Queens Of Reiki parlor was apparently employing women who operated in a pants-optional manner, and that made neighbors suspicious:
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The post-dignity era
Ozzy Osbourne’s Latest Shot In The Endorsement Dark: Oh, Honey
It’s time for another round of “What endorsement is more damaging to the already somewhat tarnished image of an aging rocker!” Your candidates today: The fake microblogs from Ozzy Osbourne that allege that dude still wears leather pants and the Gene Simmons urinal cakes! MORE »
The post-dignity era
Phil Spector’s Wall Of Hair Becomes A Casualty Of The Legal System
Above, Phil Spector bears an eerie resemblance to another rock legend in his booking photo taken at a California prison last week. It’s a testament to whoever was impersonating the disgraced record producer on Twitter that he at least got the bit about his wigs being confiscated by The Man right. [The Smoking Gun] MORE »
The post-dignity era
From the Dept. Of Oh, This Is Just Sad On About Ten Different Levels: “… the duo reportedly spent time in a bathroom stall, but a source close to Sov confirms to SPIN.com that actual galpal lip-locking went down. ‘[Lady Sov] said Katy was a good kisser,’ our source relates.” Hey Sugababes: This is a cautionary tale. Just saying. [Spin] MORE »
The post-dignity era
Sanjaya Officially Sworn Into The American Pseudo-Celebrity Firmament
Former American Idol contestant Sanjaya Malakar–the ponyhawked crooner who is probably one of the reasons that Simon Cowell is looking to abandon the States at the end of this season–will be returning to prime-time TV this summer, when he appears on the “celebrities trapped in the jungle” show I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here! MTV-spawned Barbie impersonator Heidi Montag will apparently be a member of the cast as well, thus opening the door for the two aspiring “singers” to get their duet on. MORE »
