Posts Tagged “Ashlee Simpson”
language arts
No matter how cool you are, or how many hoodies you own, parenthood is a pretty big deal. Sometimes it overcomes people in such a way that they feel compelled to make absurd analogies, such as "parenthood is like making a record," a tidy nugget of wisdom for you to sew onto your next throw pillow courtesy of soon-to-be dad Pete Wentz. "You're going to mix it for 18 years," he adds, further digging his own grave.
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just married
Despite the attention their weekend nuptials received, Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have left most of the quote-feeding to the anonymous sources who tip off the tabloids. Aside from that glorious "rock n' romance" interview for People—in which Pete revealed that Ashlee without makeup reminds him of when he was little in the summer, back when he had a boner for Jessica Rabbit—there hasn't been much chatter from the couple themselves as to what makes their union so magical, so worthy of our attention. So here are five clips that help capture the essence of the Hot Topic generation's romance for the ages.
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A YouTube Tribute To Ashlee Simpson & Pete Wentz
Despite the attention their weekend nuptials received, Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have left most of the quote-feeding to the anonymous sources who tip off the tabloids. Aside from that glorious "rock n' romance" interview for People—in which Pete revealed that Ashlee without makeup reminds him of when he was little in the summer, back when he had a boner for Jessica Rabbit—there hasn't been much chatter from the couple themselves as to what makes their union so magical, so worthy of our attention. So here are five clips that help capture the essence of the Hot Topic generation's romance for the ages.
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why does it not surprise me that ashlee simpson likes sublime?
Seventeen (which the idea of my infant daughter reading someday fills my heart with dread already) is rolling out widgets that are complete with animated somethings and interactive whatsits, which play tracks selected by today's biggest pop stars with sizable teen audiences. Apparently, if you are in fact a teenage girl, you could express your fandom for your favorite artist by embedding this sort of thing on your Facebook page. Instead, let's just take a look at the artists' choices, and validiate our existing feelings about their artistic output!
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Seventeen Magazine Lets You Openly Judge The Taste Of The Stars
Seventeen (which the idea of my infant daughter reading someday fills my heart with dread already) is rolling out widgets that are complete with animated somethings and interactive whatsits, which play tracks selected by today's biggest pop stars with sizable teen audiences. Apparently, if you are in fact a teenage girl, you could express your fandom for your favorite artist by embedding this sort of thing on your Facebook page. Instead, let's just take a look at the artists' choices, and validiate our existing feelings about their artistic output!
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don't mock the nose, or he'll break yours
Pete Wentz is being sued for a beatdown he helped security give a heckler that we reported last June. One wonders what could make such a pleasant, sensitive man like Wentz open a can of whup-ass on someone, and the answer appears to be mocking Ashlee Simpson. If you want proof of how googly-eyed Wentz is for his future wife/babymama, you need look no further than the interview People's Most Beautiful Couple of '08 gave the mag about their "Rock'n'Romance." Warning: The following quotes are not for easily queased.
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Pete Wentz: A Lover And A Fighter
Pete Wentz is being sued for a beatdown he helped security give a heckler that we reported last June. One wonders what could make such a pleasant, sensitive man like Wentz open a can of whup-ass on someone, and the answer appears to be mocking Ashlee Simpson. If you want proof of how googly-eyed Wentz is for his future wife/babymama, you need look no further than the interview People's Most Beautiful Couple of '08 gave the mag about their "Rock'n'Romance." Warning: The following quotes are not for easily queased.
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the last word
From time to time, we like to round up the all-important, all-summarizing last sentences of the biggest new-music reviews. Under consideration today is the latest album by gossip-page staple Ashlee Simpson, whose third album Bittersweet World hits stores tomorrow and has one writer reaching for the slightly unfortunate metaphor:
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Ashlee Simpson Gets Her Name In The Papers For Music-Related Reasons (Sorta)
From time to time, we like to round up the all-important, all-summarizing last sentences of the biggest new-music reviews. Under consideration today is the latest album by gossip-page staple Ashlee Simpson, whose third album Bittersweet World hits stores tomorrow and has one writer reaching for the slightly unfortunate metaphor:
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truthmongerer
Is Ashlee Simpson Trying To BitTerrorize Mariah Carey?
Like the Timex Social Club, I spend a lot of time lamenting the rumors that surround me every day. How do they get started? And where do they get crazy? In Truthmongerer, I'll try to suss out the kernels of truth in the rumors that are taking up airspace in gossip columns, blogs, and our tips inbox.
THE RUMOR: Ashlee Simpson's camp is so nervous about Mariah Carey getting all the press—and the sales—when Ashlee's long-delayed album Bittersweet World comes out at the end of April that they've actually leaked E=MC2 in an effort to make its release "less newsworthy."
TRUTH THRESHOLD: 20%.
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revisions
After much giggling over its arcade-photo-booth inkblots and bad font, Ashlee Simpson and her label have decided to make the cover for her forthcoming album, Bittersweet World, a little less k-razy. The new cover (click to enlarge) removes all the Photoshopping gone wild and swaps in a typeface that seemingly has the word "worm" somewhere in its name. Something tells me that this lunge for restraint won't do much for sales of her single with the Plain White T's guy, but hey, weirder things have happened. [Backseat Cuddler]
Ashlee Simpson Wipes The Inkblots From Her Slate
After much giggling over its arcade-photo-booth inkblots and bad font, Ashlee Simpson and her label have decided to make the cover for her forthcoming album, Bittersweet World, a little less k-razy. The new cover (click to enlarge) removes all the Photoshopping gone wild and swaps in a typeface that seemingly has the word "worm" somewhere in its name. Something tells me that this lunge for restraint won't do much for sales of her single with the Plain White T's guy, but hey, weirder things have happened. [Backseat Cuddler]
you're no dick clark, quddus philippe
I spend most Saturday mornings watching the local UHF channel's presentation of the best of Soul Train—entire episodes, including the Scramble Board!—and occasionally I wonder what happened to the teen dance show? Club MTV is long gone and American Bandstand didn't make it into the 90's, but the reasonably-priced nature of throwing some teenagers on a soundstage somewhere in Studio City to dance to various pop and urban hits seems like a can't miss programming decision. Apparently, someone at Nickelodeon has discovered a way to remotely read my thoughts (this isn't the first time I've suspected this), as they've announced 12 original episodes of Dance on Sunset! Sure, Don Cornelius won't be there or the Soul Train line, but you have to take what you can get. Instead, there's some sort of Youtubeish element involved. Plus, we get to see the Akon and Colbie Calliat duet we've all been waiting for! And Menudo! And crossover promotion for other Nickelodeon programming!
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Attention Actual Teenagers and Old Creepy Dudes: The Teen Dance Show Is Back!
I spend most Saturday mornings watching the local UHF channel's presentation of the best of Soul Train—entire episodes, including the Scramble Board!—and occasionally I wonder what happened to the teen dance show? Club MTV is long gone and American Bandstand didn't make it into the 90's, but the reasonably-priced nature of throwing some teenagers on a soundstage somewhere in Studio City to dance to various pop and urban hits seems like a can't miss programming decision. Apparently, someone at Nickelodeon has discovered a way to remotely read my thoughts (this isn't the first time I've suspected this), as they've announced 12 original episodes of Dance on Sunset! Sure, Don Cornelius won't be there or the Soul Train line, but you have to take what you can get. Instead, there's some sort of Youtubeish element involved. Plus, we get to see the Akon and Colbie Calliat duet we've all been waiting for! And Menudo! And crossover promotion for other Nickelodeon programming!
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art?
Ashlee Simpson Takes The Worst Album Cover Of The Year Contest To That Sticker Booth At The Mall
wrestling matches
I have listened to "Rule Breaker," the latest song to emerge from Ashlee Simpson's forthcoming album Bittersweet World, about five times now, and much like when I was confronted with that other song by that other Ashley last year, I'm emerging from each listening session confused. The guitar lick—it sounds kind of sleaze-rockish! Would I enjoy it if someone who didn't sound all drunken-sorority-karaoke was on vocals? The beat—it's sort of reminding me of just-at-the-curdling-point Le Tigre! But am I being too hard on the song because the lyrics say things like "I just wanna color outside the lines / I've been reprimanded 'bout a thousand times"? This is definitely one of those tracks that needs an artist with less baggage to perform it, because the prospect of listening to it a bunch more just holds no appeal for me at all. Oh, overheated celebrity music world of today, you are so cruel to your listeners! [YouTube]
Ashlee Simpson Tries To Transform Herself Into Le Tigre, With Middling Results
I have listened to "Rule Breaker," the latest song to emerge from Ashlee Simpson's forthcoming album Bittersweet World, about five times now, and much like when I was confronted with that other song by that other Ashley last year, I'm emerging from each listening session confused. The guitar lick—it sounds kind of sleaze-rockish! Would I enjoy it if someone who didn't sound all drunken-sorority-karaoke was on vocals? The beat—it's sort of reminding me of just-at-the-curdling-point Le Tigre! But am I being too hard on the song because the lyrics say things like "I just wanna color outside the lines / I've been reprimanded 'bout a thousand times"? This is definitely one of those tracks that needs an artist with less baggage to perform it, because the prospect of listening to it a bunch more just holds no appeal for me at all. Oh, overheated celebrity music world of today, you are so cruel to your listeners! [YouTube]
delays
Is Pushing An Album Back Ever Good For Its Health?
Today Kelefa Sanneh wrote about All $tar, a Nashville rapper who's been the city's "next big thing" for three years now—excxept for the fact that his debut album, Street Ball, has been in limbo since 2005, thanks to his label, Cash Money/Universal, going over the preparation for the album with what seems to be the finest-tooth comb ever. (Sanneh: "...it's not uncommon for rappers to wait months or years while labels try to figure out the right single, the right track selection, the right marketing plan.") What struck me is that I've heard about so many delayed albums lately—from Amerie to All $tar to Nicole Scherzinger—that I can't help but wonder if the music industry is further shooting its sales hopes in the foot by stoking negative buzz around albums by somewhat established stars or high-profile up-and-comers. Especially in the current environment of music, where people seem to have many excuses for ignoring records at the ready. After the jump, a few arguments against pushing release dates, marketing-department-emanating objections be damned.
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counter-counterpoint/counterpoint
We've been following the exploits of the moshpitting, Jonas Brothers-hating YouTube sensation ADiehardFOBFan all week, but only Alex Goldberg—who likes to go by the name XxstrokesmegafanxX from time to time—was outraged enough by her profane, grouchy tirades to craft his own point-by-point response; to shield him from the kinda-dim YouTube commenting hordes, we've posted it here. Be warned: It contains even more 9/11 conspiracy theories and the day's second reference to Full House!
"A Real Mosh Pit Is When You're At A Spank Rock Show And He Throws His American Apparel Sunglasses In The Crowd"
We've been following the exploits of the moshpitting, Jonas Brothers-hating YouTube sensation ADiehardFOBFan all week, but only Alex Goldberg—who likes to go by the name XxstrokesmegafanxX from time to time—was outraged enough by her profane, grouchy tirades to craft his own point-by-point response; to shield him from the kinda-dim YouTube commenting hordes, we've posted it here. Be warned: It contains even more 9/11 conspiracy theories and the day's second reference to Full House!
counterpoint/counterpoint
Dear readers: I am so thrown off by this "East Coast blogging on Pacific Standard Time" thing that I can't tell if it's 1:30 or 4:30, if I should be eating brunch or dinner or afternoon tea! (So I decided to get some In & Out, which is really appropriate for any time of day.) I'm all off-kilter and the fact that I haven't showered yet is just adding to my general disarray. However, there is one thing I can count on: The ever-burning anger of our friend ADiehardFOBFan, who has brought along a (not as funny as her!) friend for her latest clip, an anti-Ashlee Simpson treatise that seems to stem entirely from the fact that they got shut out of a Fall Out Boy show in their hometown because of a high proportion of tickets being bought by Ashlee fans. It seems just absurd enough to work, right? And yet... More »
Jonas Brothers Hater Refocuses Her Ire, Brings A Friend Along
Dear readers: I am so thrown off by this "East Coast blogging on Pacific Standard Time" thing that I can't tell if it's 1:30 or 4:30, if I should be eating brunch or dinner or afternoon tea! (So I decided to get some In & Out, which is really appropriate for any time of day.) I'm all off-kilter and the fact that I haven't showered yet is just adding to my general disarray. However, there is one thing I can count on: The ever-burning anger of our friend ADiehardFOBFan, who has brought along a (not as funny as her!) friend for her latest clip, an anti-Ashlee Simpson treatise that seems to stem entirely from the fact that they got shut out of a Fall Out Boy show in their hometown because of a high proportion of tickets being bought by Ashlee fans. It seems just absurd enough to work, right? And yet... More »






