Idolator: Blind Item

Blind Item: Which Pop Star Was Afraid Of Getting Popped (For Charity) By Bono?

Maura Johnston — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 10:30:00 EDT

"Which pop superstar asked friends to hide them from Bono at an event as they were terrified of being roped into his Red scheme?" Well, it's definitely not Bob Dylan... [Popbitch]

Blind-Item Break: Which Rock Star Has A Contentious Relationship With His In-Laws?

Maura Johnston — Thu, 03 Jul 2008 11:30:00 EDT

"Which rock star's mother-in-law said about him this week? 'He looks like a rat but he's a good father to the kids... But he's a miserable, rat-faced man.' " [popbitch]

A Blind Item To Make You Shake Your Head And Sigh

Maura Johnston — Tue, 27 May 2008 16:30:00 EDT

"MOVING ON: Is one top-level music journalist about to leave a high-visibility post due to newsroom cutbacks? Inquiring minds want to know where said journo might be headed next." I'd ask "so, which news outlet is making cutbacks on the editorial side?" but the answer "uh, all of them?" isn't all that helpful toward the end of figuring out the item. (And remember, folks, you might want to temper any schadenfreude you might feel as you reel off a list of potential candidates, as the word "cutbacks" doesn't exactly imply that said old-guard member is going to be replaced.) (I know, I know, I'm a total fun-sucker. But it's true!) [Hits]

Blind Item! Which Indie Rocker Made The Mistake Of Screwing A Times Writer?

Anthony Miccio — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:30:00 EDT

The Sunday NYT features a gripping "Modern Love" column in which comedienne Julie Klausner has sex with an indie rocker who doesn't text back promptly. Even though found his stereotypical, passive shtick annoying, she thought he was cute and was mildly disappointed when it turned out he was only interested in casual sex. Aside from his having an illegitimate child, most of the details regarding this awkward singer are pretty damn universal. Universal enough that one might wonder what the hell she was expecting from the dalliance, and definitely universal enough that there's no guarantee that this guy is even famous. But we can dream.

What we know (assuming this isn't bullshit):

• He's cute.

• He hangs out at NYC karaoke nights.

• Karaoke nights where you can do "Christmas Wrapping" by the Waitresses.

• He doesn't use capital letters in e-mails.

• He has sharp cheekbones.

• "He's an indie rock dreamboat. His voice is transcendent and he writes lovely lyrics. He has a nice face, he has a kid and he tours a lot. He's a star in his world."

• His music is "typical emo stuff: droney, thick, exhausting, but obviously heartfelt."

• His babymama lives overseas.

Seeing as how the little boy has yellow hair, I want to assume it's Evan Dando. Sure, I don't know if Evan has a kid, and it's probable that Klausner would have known of him already, but still. Evan Dando. Mmmm.

Here's a clip of Julie Klausner singing "Honky Cat" with some cats.

She performs at Joe's Pub looking that good, and this is the first time a rock musician not looking for commitment tried to hit her up? Really?

Was I on a Date or Baby-Sitting? [NYT; HT Jami Attenberg]
Honky Cat by Julie Klasner [MySpace]

Blind-Item Bleh: How On Earth Did The Term "Booger Sugar" Get Past A Copyeditor?

Maura Johnston — Fri, 25 Apr 2008 10:30:00 EDT

"Which 'sensitive' heartthrob rocker does his best work with a snoot full of booger sugar? Girls who flock to his side at NYC clubs notice he can't go but five minutes between bathroom breaks." [Gatecrasher / Pic via swruler9284]

Blind-Item Break: Which Hip-Hop Mogul Was Cursing The Southern State Parkway's Lack Of Rest Stops?

Maura Johnston — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 10:45:00 EDT

"WHICH hip-hop mogul needed to make an emergency stop on the Southern State Parkway last Sunday at 6:30 p.m.? After being caught in a long rubbernecking delay, the very recognizable music/fashion entrepreneur had his chauffeur pull over his Bentley - or was it a Rolls? - so he could relieve himself." [NYP]

Blind-Item Bloat: Which Pop Star Is Begging To Be A Bond Girl?

Maura Johnston — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 09:45:25 EDT

"Which faded pop star is so desperate to resurrect her career, she is shamelessly touting her CV to James Bond producers and Hollywood bigwigs?" [Mirror]

Blind-Item Blues: The Saddest Singer On The Cross-Continental Flight

Maura Johnston — Fri, 07 Mar 2008 09:15:30 EST

"Which mournful solo artist is obsessed with his own level of fame? After convincing himself on a recent flight to Australia that he would be mobbed in the streets, the scrawny singer was nonplussed that most Aussies didn't recognize him." [Gatecrasher]

Who's Adding "Clothing Designer" To Her Slightly Tarnished Resume?

Maura Johnston — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 10:45:26 EST

"Which floundering pop star is hoping a unisex clothing line will rehab her nonexistent singing career?" I'm not sure, but I hope this isn't a coded warning that the parents of America's young men will have to worry about Avril Lavigne's splttle-flecked influence too! [Rush & Molloy]

Blind-Item Blitz: We're Aiken To Solve This One

Maura Johnston — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 14:34:00 EST

From today's installment of the always-pretty-easy Gatecrasher: "Which singer turned Broadway star is miserable along the Great White Way? Although he privately gripes that he hates the show he's in, he has to ride out his contract." [Gatecrasher]

Which Musical Metrosexual Can't Stop Getting His Nails Done?

Jess Harvell — Wed, 23 Jan 2008 16:45:41 EST

This is probably the silliest Idolator blind item poll in an illustrious history of silly-ass blind item polls, especially since male beautifying is no longer so verboten as to be shocking. (I'm even shaving more than once a month now. Up next: ironing my shirts.) Nonetheless we must scratch our heads as we wonder: "Which macho crooner secretly loves manicures and pedicures? The ladies' man pretends he's off to the gym whenever he's going to get pampered." Admittedly it was the "macho" part that initially threw us, as it 86's about 95 percent of the XY chromosomes currently clogging Billboard, but we think we've come up with a few distinct possibilities and a couple of outliers.

Daily Mirror Blind Item Poll [Crazy Days And Nights]

Presenting The Most Infuriating Musical Blind Item Of The Year (So Far)

jharv — Wed, 09 Jan 2008 10:35:31 EST

The Idolator braintrust has spent the last twenty minutes scratching our heads over this New York Daily News blind item, and frankly we were just about to give up: "Which distinctively named member of a chart-topping pop group swings both ways? He surprised his male talent escort at a recent Hollywood red-carpet event with an invitation back to his hotel room." Distinctively named? Like...with multiple umlauts? Or with a "y" in place of an "i"? (Also, what is a "male talent escort"? As Maura said, "I feel like this item is written in some like just-off-English dialect.") And "chart-topping pop group" does allow us to leave out, uh, Crocus Behemoth and Euronymous from Mayhem. But a chart-topping pop group from what decade? This was next to impossible, but please cast your vote for one of our shot-in-the-dark guesses (or write in one of your own).

Don't Shoot The Messenger [New York Daily News]

Blind Item Reveals That Some Musicians May Not Be Faithful To Their Spouses

mjohnston — Thu, 06 Dec 2007 08:54:30 EST

From today's Gatecrasher:

Which velvet-voiced crooner with a famous parent is using his new fame to stock his bed with young lovelies - every time his wife is out of town?

We'd have said "all of them" were it not for that "famous parent" caveat, but frankly, trying to figure this one out is making us feel a little... thick.

New York Minute [NYDN]

Can Someone Explain To Us What An "Unlikely Nose Job" Is?

mjohnston — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 14:30:55 EST

Because it would go a long way toward helping us figure out the subject of this blind item from today's New York Daily News:

Which female singer - who has had the same unlikely nose job as her brother - has a metal brace up her schnoz to keep it from collapsing? The device was noticed by a stylist who had bent down to lace her boots.

Now, the words "singer," "nose job," and "brother" automatically conjure up the name "Janet Jackson," but is there any universe in which rhinoplasty within that particular family is "unlikely"? Really now.

New York Minute [NYDN]

Which Alt-Country Act Was Discovered With A Coke-Covered Fingernail Up Its Nostril?

jharv — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 11:00:25 EST

Silly Daily News blind items can you teach much of practical use in your everyday life. For instance, this time we learned all sorts of new, MacGyver-esque uses for fake fingernails. Did you know they were strong enough that you can rock out with them? Or that they can also be used for snorting illegal narcotics with alt-country stars?

Which local singer who was opening for the national tour of a well-known alt-country act lost the fake nail she was using as a guitar pick? When she finally tracked it down, the headlining band was using it to cut up cocaine lines in the back of their tour bus.

Okay, so were thinking about doing a poll, but frankly if the answer isn't Ryan Adams, we'll eat a fake nail heaped with blow.

New York Minute [Daily News]

Which Country Group Spent The Day After The CMAs With Coke Nose?

jharv — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 14:00:31 EST

Country music is not known for odes to burying your face in a big pile of illegal stimulants. Hence, the following blind item piqued our interest: "At a CMA after party, this award winning group had a drinking contest. Kind of boring huh? Maybe this fact will change your mind. When they were playing quarters, if someone got the quarter in the glass, the other members of the group had to do a line of coke. Kind of surprising considering they aren't the slimmest bunch of people." Since when did country stars start having their after parties at MisShapes? So who's been hiding ten gallons of blow under their hat?

Taking "group" to mean "more than two people" here. Because Montgomery Gentry are clearly hopped up on something.

Today's Blind Items [Crazy Days And Nights]

Which Hip-Hop Family Man Is Knockin' Boots With Multiple Partners In Public?

jharv — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 09:10:38 EDT

We woke up this morning and thought, "You know what we haven't had for a while? A good blind item poll." And when we opened the Daily News, we found this: "Which famously un-single hip-hop powerhouse recently had a booty call with three women in a private third-floor room of that very trendy restaurant on Greenwich St.?" (Ah, from the Burger King bathroom to a private room in a trendy restaurant.) But who was this cocksman breaking multiple commandments?

Don't Shoot The Messenger [Daily News]

Which Hip-Hop Star Is Breaking Multiple Commandments?

jharv — Fri, 24 Aug 2007 08:52:23 EDT

If there's one attribute amongst rappers that's wholly overrated it's "realness"; at this point I'm really not going to be impressed if I find out that Yung Joc actually sold angel dust out of an ice cream van he painted black, clipping old ladies from the back window with poison darts as he drove by them. So when the New York Post asks "What rapper - and it's not Diddy - has exaggerated his hardscrabble childhood to help build his reputation?" my first instinct is to say "most of them." But no, there's one specifically this gossip page blind item has in mind, thanks to the mention that "his mom wasn't as bad as he rhymes." Wait, don't most rappers love their mamas in an overly maudlin fashion? Who could this be? Surely the identity of this fibbing mother-hater can only be solved by a patented Idolator TGIF/eight-hours-to-the-weekend poll:

Just Asking [New York Post]

Which Hip-Hop Lady Is Hiding A "Big" Secret?

jharv — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 15:45:26 EDT

A juicy if typically vague blind item at Concrete Loop casts doubt on the heterosexuality of yet another female rapper—or, excuse us, "hip-hop lesbian," which could mean anyone from a journalist to a label gofer, but we're gonna guess it's a rapper—who has some very specific requests in bed. This silly "mystery" looks like a job for our comments box pollsters: Which hip-hop honey wants to be your father figure? You can find out a little bit more about this lady and our guesses as to her identity (which, to be fair, include just about every female rapper who's released an album in the last two years) after the jump:

This hip-hop lesbian is down for her role as the "man" in her relationships. She tells her friends, "I put my mack down in and outta bed." This skirt chaser is also known to raid escort agencies for pretty girls. She brings the sex toys to use and is known to freak out if escorts suggest using the gadgets on her (fear of penetration).

The escorts add: You also have to call her "Big Daddy" throughout the encounter or she gets very angry, won't tip and won't request you again.

Another Hip-Hop Lesbian [Concrete Loop]

Which Pop Starlet Is Doubling As An Adderall Dispenser?

mjohnston — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 12:15:21 EDT

From today's Rush & Molloy: "What pint-size pop star likes to pop Adderall? She's even tried to foist the prescription zinger on female friends." Is the doubled-up use of the word "pop" a hint, or are Rush & Molloy on to another ADD-drug distributor? Take the poll:

Rush & Molloy [NY Daily News]

Hip-Hop Star's Entourage Growing By The Nine-Month Interval

mjohnston — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 09:45:56 EDT

From today's Page Six: "WHICH hip-hop legend is going to go broke paying child support? Besides his known baby mamas, seven months ago, a member of his entourage gave birth to another child of his, which was the last straw for his girlfriend." Considering that the most-emailed story in the item's sidebar is headlined "DIDDY BABY MAMA MOVES OUT," it's not too hard to hazard a guess—although this item is definitely worthy of some blind-item-writing kudos, since referring to the flow-challenged Diddy as a "legend" is a great way to throw readers off the scent.

JUST ASKING [Page Six]

Which Country Crooner Is Playing It Straight?

Brian Raftery — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 10:10:33 EDT

From today's "Gatecrasher" column in the New York Daily News:

Which rising country star who markets himself as straight and Southern actually has a boyfriend and is from a chilly corner of the Midwest?

Kenny possibly be talking about who we think he's talking about? Probably not. But we're eager to hear your guesses.

Gatecrasher

The Continuing Story Of A Quack Who's Gone To The Dogs

Brian Raftery — Mon, 07 May 2007 09:45:15 EDT

This anonymous entry from yesterday's Daily News has us stumped; without the usual not-so-hard-to-decipher hint, we couldn't narrow the list of suspects down beyond three dozen or so names:

Which rocker was reduced to snorting cocaine off the back of his dog after it jumped up on him, spilling a gram of the stuff over itself?

We know what you're thinking, but trust us: She doesn't count as a rocker.

Gatecrasher [Daily News]

Blind-Item Blitz: The Lost Art Of Keeping A Seacrest

Brian Raftery — Thu, 19 Apr 2007 12:10:09 EDT

From the always-pretty-easy-to-the-point-of-libelous Gatecrasher:

Which "American Idol" hottie was observed entering a bathroom stall with four guy friends at an L.A. nightspot Saturday night? Maybe they were having a meeting of the No Girls Allowed club.

We give up. Martina McBride? Sundance Head?

Don't Shoot The Messenger [NY Daily News]

Blind-Item Rave: Which DJ Duo Is Spinning Lies?

Brian Raftery — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 12:33:34 EDT

From the chemically bothered British gossip digest Popbitch:

Which superstar DJ combo only has one technologically competent member? One does all the knob-twiddling in the studio while the other just puts his feet up. And consequently only gets 33% of the duo's royalties.

Tee-hee. For some reason, "knob-twiddling" sounds much funnier when read with an imaginary British accent. Anyway, we know this is about concert DJs, not radio DJs, but we're still gonna go with those guys from WJKH's "Morning Nut Hut" show. Mr. Spanks really seems to be phoning it in lately.

A Sexed-Up Blind Item That Really Stings

Brian Raftery — Thu, 29 Mar 2007 11:30:22 EDT

This item from the weekly PopBitch email got our attention:

Which rock star is known for liking a lot of oral attention while away on a video shoot or tour? Groupies are looking to cop a good feel this year as he's back on tour.

Hmmm. A "cop" who's "back on tour"? We de do do do, da da da do not who that could be.

PopBitch

Blind-Item Bitchiness: Who's The Slimy Cokehead Dwarf With Bad Taste?

Brian Raftery — Tue, 13 Mar 2007 09:47:57 EDT

This post on the anonymous bitch-session website save the assistants got our attention:

I've worked in the music industry for about 8 or 9 years now...the breeding ground for some of the most base and morally reprehensible characters ever to walk the corporate halls. Currently, there is a president of a music label (who shall remain nameless) who embodies all that is evil and wrong. He is a cokehead dwarf of a human being who has the worst taste in music (for starters) and is so slimy, it's pathetic. If you're not part of his "in crowd" group of promo and A&R people (or a beautiful young woman willing to fuck her way up), he has little interest.

I work for someone who is much less evil but extremely difficult and the two absolutely hate each other. Because of this hatred, I am the bastard child who is shunned in every conceivable way. I'm not just talking about not being acknowledged in the hall, I'm talking about open hostility. It's upsetting. Regardless of how good I am at my job, I am ignored, not invited to company meetings, completely not included in any of the new projects that EVERYONE else gets to participate in... generally just not made a part of "the team."

Take today. The big boss, Satan (as we'll refer to him), was walking up and down the halls with a new artist on the label. He was talking as loudly as possible so everyone would pay attention, overusing the word "dawg" and phrases like "off the hook." I don't think I'm giving anything away when I say that Satan (in this case) is small, white and Jewish, so urban slang looks and sounds, well, retarded.

As I sat there, Satan introduced this person to everyone standing within my general vicinity... except for me. In fact, he looked right at me and then turned and walked away. How uncomfortable is that? Not because I've done anything wrong, not because I suck at my job. Just because I assist someone he doesn't like. It's not that I expect or feel that I should be singled out as a brilliant employee and coddled and told that I'm great. But to be singled out as the person who should be ignored in a happy little crowd of excited record company people is just mean and cruel. As if I the person I assist didn't make sure he wipes his feet on me at every chance that comes along.

When you're being kicked in the teeth everyday with insults and treated like your stupidity is a constant annoyance, having your boss's boss shit on you is an entirely new level to assistant abuse. Of course, in this business in particular I can tell you it isn't uncommon. Unfortunately, the frequency with which it occurs doesn't make it any less hurtful and disgusting.

Any guesses as to either of these execs' identities? We were going to go with Sir Dennis Eaton-Hogg, but we don't think he's still working.

behind the music executives [savetheassistants.com]

Blind Items Reveal That Small Segment Of Musicians May Occasionally Use Drugs

Brian Raftery — Tue, 20 Feb 2007 10:25:05 EST

We've no idea why the NYC gossips have been so music-obsessed lately, but we'll take what we can get. From today's Page Six:

WHICH leotard-loving pop icon won't be performing in Tokyo any time soon? Our tipster said she's been banned from entering Japan "because she got caught with drugs" there . . . WHICH funnyman musician wound down after his recent concert here by getting "stoned out of his mind" at his after-party?

We know that one entry is just screaming "John Mayer," but trust us: He hasn't played Japan in years.

Just Asking [NYPost.com]