To begin: Fuck Digg and those 100% tiresome Human Giant guys.
Apparently this particular tirade was finally, belatedly set off by Kanye finding a link to this FunnyOrDie video starring Paul Scheer on the nerd circle-jerk Digg. And honestly, if I found that particular combination of Internet peanut galleries mocking me with comments like "I missed Ghostland Observatory for his sorry ass"? I'd probably go off on an Internet tirade, too. (Although I'd just write it in all-lowercase.)

Apparently Kanye has never been this mad before in his entire life, even when he got jobbed at the European VMAs or when he got snubbed at the VMAs or etc., etc. But see, that's what happens when you let anger fester for nearly 240 hours!
"But this Bonnaroo thing is the worst insult I've ever had in my life. This is the most offended I've ever been... this is the maddest I ever will be. I'm typing so fucking hard I might break my fucking Mac book Air!!!!!!!! Call me any name you want.... arrogant, conceited, narcissistic, racist, metro, fag whatever you can think of.... BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL! NEVER SAY I DIDN'T GIVE MY ALL! THIS SHOWS NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY TO BE GOOD AT SOMETHING THERE WILL BE PEOPLE THERE TO LIE ABOUT YOU AND BRING YOU DOWN!"

Bonnaroo did not have Kanye's back.
"BONNAROO SHOULD HAVE RELEASED A STATEMENT IN MY DEFENSE BUT SINCE THEY HAVEN'T LET'S BREAK DOWN THE WALLS ON THIS TRUMAN SHOW AND LET YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY OCCURRED!!! FOR OVER A MONTH WE WENT BACK AND FORTH ON WETHER OR NOT WE COULD EVEN FIT MY STAGE AT THE FESTIVAL. ONE DAY THEY WOULD SAY YES... WE'D SEND THEM OUR SPECS THEN THEY THEY'D SAY OK... THEN THEY WOULD SEND SPECS BACK THAT DIDN'T FIT THE STAGE. WE WERE OBVIOUSLY DEALING WITH FUCKING IDIOTS WHO DIDN'T REALLY HAVE THE CAPACITY TO REALLY PUT ON THIS SHOW PROPERLY. THEY TRIED 2 GIVE ME A TIME SLOT WERE IT WAS STILL LIGHT OUTSIDE ... I HAVE A FUCKING LIGHT SHOW DUMB ASS, IT'S NOT CALLED GLOW IN THE DARK FOR NO REASON SQUID BRAINS!"

This mess is also Pearl Jam's fault. With exclamation points. Not that you Ghostland Observatory-fellating kiddies would care.
"MY PRODUCTION MANAGER TRIED TO LOAD IN FOR 24 HOURS BEFORE I WENT ON STAGE BUT THE FESTIVAL WOULDN'T ALLOW US TO DO ANYTHING UNTILL PEARL JAM LEFT THE STAGE. PEARL JAM ENDED ONE HOUR
LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT THAT POINT WE'RE RACING AGAINST THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT 4:20AM DON COMES BACK 2 THE BUS AND TELLS ME, " IT WOULD TAKE 45 MORE MINUTES TO PUT ALL YOUR PYRO IN!" I SAY I HAVE TO GET OUT THERE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE . I"

He was really upset about "Stronger" being performed in less-than-optimal conditions, given that he's so fussy about it. (OK, so he's fussy about everything.)
"I CUT A FEW SONGS FROM THE SET BECAUSE I WANTED PEOPLE 2 EXPERIENCE STRONGER WHILE THERE WAS STILL SOME DARKNESS TO PERFORM IT IN. I'VE STRUGGLED WITH STRONGER FROM IT'S CONCEPTION. REMEMBER LAST SUMMER WHEN I CANCELED SOME TV APPEARANCES. IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO PERFORM STRONGER IN THE DAYTIME. ANYONE WHO CAME TO THE GLOW TOUR CAN UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED PEOPLE TO SEE IT PROPERLY. IT BROKE MY HEART THAT I COULDN'T GIVE THESE FANS STRONGER IN IT'S GREATEST FORM... BY THE TIME I GOT TO STRONGER IT WAS DAYTIME AND IT BROKE MY HEART."

He is achy and broke. Can't you have a heart?
"WHEN I GOT 2 "THROUGH THE WIRE" I STEPPED ON THE FRONT PART OF MY STAGE AND THERE WAS SO MUCH LIQUID ON THE STAGE I COULDN'T MOVE WITHOUT SLIPPING. I HAD TO ADJUST MY WHOLE PERFORMANCE STYLE BECAUSE OF IT." ...
"I'M SORRY TO EVERYONE THAT I DIDN'T HAVE THE ABILITY 2 GIVE THE PERFORMANCE I WANTED TO. I'M SORRY... SOMETIMES I GO 2, 3 DAYS W/O SLEEP WORKING ON MY PERFORMANCE... I HAVE TO ICE MY KNEES AFTER EVERY SHOW AND THEY HURT WHEN I WALK THROUGH THE AIRPORT... HAVING AN EXPENSIVE STAGE CUTS MY PAYDAY IN HALF... "

Aw. Although maybe he should hold back on posting any more $650,000 watches until this whole thing has blown over a bit? (Just trying to help!)

UNTITLED [kanYe West: Blog]
Earlier: Bonnaroo: Kanye West Gets Up With The Sun

After all the build-up and hype, including the shifting of his set from 8:15 p.m. Saturday to 2:45 a.m. Sunday so that festivalgoers could behold "the full experience," Kanye didn't simply not deliver—he insulted the people who waited for him until 4:25 a.m. by failing to even address them in any way. No "Hello, Bonnaroo," no "I'm sorry for the delay," nothing besides a few pyrotechnics, some grandiose CGI, and boorish interactions with his spaceship's computer. Named Jane, the HAL 9000ish foil to Kanye's presumptive David Bowman, the communication between Kanye and computer proved to be nothing more than a great reason for him to ignore the crowd. He seemed oblivious to his surroundings, choosing to focus on his own machinations while the sleepless masses stared on in pseudo-disbelief.

I'll be curious to see what Kanye has to say about this in his blog; but for now, the "glow-in-the-dark" set was more like "glow-in-the-dawn," as thousands watched the sun come up while wondering what got Kanye so discombobulated that he managed to forget the feelings of the very people he convinced to wait on him.

[Photo: File, since Kanye's no-picture policy was still in effect. Well, officially, anyway.]

Forbes is nice enough to detail how its readers can soak up the festival experience without experiencing the actual festival itself.

To get the most out of any festival, consider purchasing a VIP pass. Though they cost as much as three-times the regular admission, a VIP pass will guarantee a higher level of service. At Bonnaroo, where VIP admission is $1,169.50 for a pair, the special treatment includes preferred parking, seats closer to the concert stage, nicer shower and restroom facilities and VIP-only events. Regularly priced passes start at $209.50.

At other festivals, VIP treatment comes for a smaller price. Fans of '80s hair-band acts like Bret Michaels (lead singer of Poison), Warrant and Tesla can get VIP passes to the Rocklahoma festival (July 9-13) in Pryor, Okla., for $400. The pass entitles ticket-holders to up-close seats and meals and beverages.

With or without a VIP pass, many of these festivals offer cool extras. At Rocklahoma, $2,000 will get you an hours-long session with a festival musician. The evening ends with a 10-minute set before a roaring rock 'n' roll crowd. Mark Nuessle, president and general manager of Catch the Fever Music Festivals, which organizes the event, says the sessions haven't been advertised, but half of the slots are already sold.

All Points West organizer Ken Tessler says he may add additional components once the event date nears but is currently planning an interactive art exhibit and will host an eco-village where audience members can learn about environmental issues. At Pemberton, local outdoors companies will take concert-goers horseback riding, whitewater rafting and hiking for an additional price.

How can you pass up those bargains? Besides the fact that you might be the only person at Bonnaroo who takes a shower, those entry-level portable toilets are a drag, and the price difference is barely more than $800 a person. All Points West will likely not have the same celebrity be-seen quotient as its sister festival Coachella, but that eco-village sounds promising.

It's easy to understand the economics behind offering the V.I.P. ticket, since most are likely sold to corporate outfits who want to impress their clients and higher-ups, but it certainly gives people within that bubble a vastly different experience than one might get hanging out with the riff raff. Then again, can you really put a prize on a one-on-one experience with one of the members of Trixter?

Sensational Summertime Music Festivals [Forbes]

More conspiracizing after the jump!

So instead, they wait until tickets are already on sale to announce Zeppelin— but they also float the idea out there informally, as a "wink wink, nudge nudge" to the fans that follow live music closely. Even better, they book LEZ Zeppelin so that they can point to a specific point that's causing all the confusion.

I also think that if this is the case, it was genius to announce the lineup at midnight. The drama/confusion plays out overnight, rather than during the day when everyone is at work checking the internet. By the morning, they knew all this would be cleared up— and tickets will go on sale with a normal health demand.

Bonnaroo tickets will sell out regardless, like they have the past few years. They don't need to announce Zeppelin on day 1.

I know it's a long shot, I know it's a crazy complicated conspiracy theory. But it's also EXACTLY the way to work the situation if it's true.

Hmm. Hmmmm! It sounds crazy enough to be sorta... plausible?

Earlier: A Roach's comment
[Photo: AP]

Led (sic!!!!) Zeppelin Heads Bonnaroo Lineup [AP]

Pearl Jam
Metallica
Jack Johnson
Kanye West
Robert Plant & Alison Krauss
Phil Lesh & Friends
My Morning Jacket
The Allman Brothers Band
The Raconteurs
Willie Nelson
Death Cab for Cutie
B.B. King
Sigur Ros
Levon Helm and the Ramble on the Road
Ben Folds
O.A.R.
The Bluegrass Allstars ft. Luke Bulla, Sam Bush, Jerry Douglas, Bela Fleck, Edgar Meyer and Bryan Sutton
M.I.A.
Umphrey's McGee
Iron & Wine
Yonder Mountain String Band
Swell Season
Talib Kweli
Derek Trucks & Susan Tedeschi's Soul Stew Revival
Gogol Bordello
Broken Social Scene
Robert Randolph's Revival
Rilo Kiley
Mastodon
Lupe Fiasco
Against Me!
Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings
Pat Green
Ozomatli
Tegan & Sara
Solomon Burke
Drive-By Truckers
!!!
The Avett Brothers
Israel Vibration
Abigail Washburn & the Sparrow Quartet featuring Bela Fleck
Phil Lesh / Larry Campbell / Jackie Greene
Aimee Mann
Ladytron
The Fiery Furnaces
Orchestra Baobab
Ghostland Observatory
Jose Gonzalez
Dark Star Orchestra
Minus the Bear
Donavon Frankenreiter
Lez Zeppelin
State Radio
Battles
Jakob Dylan
Two Gallants
The Sword
Vampire Weekend
Little Feat
Nicole Atkins
The Felice Brothers
Mason Jennings
MGMT
The Lee Boys
Black Kids
Serena Ryder
Steel Train
Grupo Fantasma
Back Door Slam

Bonnaroo Comedy:
Bonnaroo Late Night Chat About with David Cross
Janeane Garofalo
Zach Galifianakis
Jim Norton
Brian Posehn
Mike Birbiglia
John Mulaney
Michelle Buteau

1. "There is more than one Manchester"

2. "Memphis isn't Albany"

3. "Clouds taste this way"

4. "Some Herrings are red, Jimmy"

5. "Hard Substance, Soft Substance"

6. "Janis Joplin's reserves will be preserved"

7. "Rumors are just rumors, but twist them sideways, grow your humor hair and they become a more yen reality. No, this is not about Fleetwood Mac"

8. "It's not sour, what is sowed in the earth"

9. "Three certain birds, add one"

10. "Look to the center of Europe to get the sound, but the band comes form all around."

11. "Here is another clue for you message board people. Open up the church and you will see the steeple. Some of your guesses have been way off but correct for the wrong clues. Now I must cough."

Oh my God, what music blogger wrote that last one? Anyway, feel free to post your guesses in comments. I'm guessing that No. 1 is a reference to Morrissey and No. 4 means that one day will be punctuated by a live-action revival of Clue: The Movie, but if No. 6 winds up being about Joss Stone I'm going to flip out.

Bonnaroo [Official site via Stereogum]

Dave Grohl is reportedly waiting on a very important phone call, an invitation to go drum on the rumoured Led Zeppelin reunion tour.

Apparently the Foo Fighters man is desperate to take control of the skins for anymore shows the band might play despite the fact that he praised Jason Bonham's performance at the O2 Arena show.

According to one of those people that seem to know everything - the insider - Grohl was also in the running to take Bonham's role at the London gig.

Gigwise's rumor was reprinted from the Daily Star, which we've covered in this space before and which has since then actually put its stories online in non-PDF form. To welcome the fine folks over there to 1997, let's see what their original piece said:

SPOTTED a certain Dave Grohl at the recent Led Zeppelin reunion gig at the 02.

That's the same Dave Grohl who sports a series of tattoos in honour of Zep's late drummer John Bonham.

This got me thinking that should the Zep reform for the tour that's being talked about in 2008, they should give Uncle Dave a call. It seems that Grohl would jump at the chance to play with his heroes.

My man in the know says: "Dave flew in especially for the shows and played air guitar and air drums throughout the gig.

"He was in the running to take over from John Bonham a few years ago and he's still gagging to get on stage with the Zep.

"While he loves playing with Foo Fighters, Dave would drop anything to be part of Zep's shows."

So get on the phone Mr Page, as your campaign begins here. The Zep need him I reckon.

See? From a Livejournaly ramble about Dave Grohl being totally awesome to a picture of him waiting by the phone, desperate for contact from his heroes, all because of a few words being rearranged and misinterpreted. This, my friends, is how your sausage bangers get made!

Led Zep for festival [Mirror]
Grohl will add zip to the Zep [Daily Star]
Dave Grohl To Drum On Led Zeppelin Reunion Tour? [Gigwise]
[Photo: Getty]

"The rumors that are out there about the Bonnaroo 2008 headliners are inaccurate," Superfly Presents and A.C. Entertainment said in a statement released to Billboard.com. "We're very excited about the lineup that we're putting together for this year's festival. We'll be announcing the confirmed lineup toward the end of January/beginning of February."

Hmm... but that doesn't say flat-out "Led Zeppelin is not playing," now, does it! Oh, I hate denials that are more confusing than the rumors inspired by them.

Bonnaroo Promoters Quash Lineup Rumors [Billboard]

Zeppelin just confirmed for Bonnaroo. They can't officially announce until after the London gig so pass it on! Also Metallica is confirmed on the bill too!

Of all the venues in all the nifty 50... Bonnaroo? Really? Guess it is shaping up to be the closet thing we have to a classic rock festival in this country, unless the band was going to start hitting state fairs. So get those camping supplies in order now, kids! Led Zeppelin takes America and its hippies! And so does Metallica, if you can still manage to care.

well today's update is that hot chip in a complete non-shocker are hogging EVERY FREE IPOD.

there was a sign up sheet for them and you had to write what band you were in beside your name and it was like

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

HOT CHIP

as if they need a fucking ipod, let alone all of the ipods. So they had me sign up anyway and were like "we'll email one to you." ?????

also,

?uestlove whining and having a baby fit over the free beer selection (puhLEEZE)

john paul jones scoring free $250 sunglasses

lewis black NEVER LEAVES THE ARTISTS HOSPITALITY BAR

david cross hanging out with the black keys drummer, apparently bffs

el-p hugs each sound man and crew member after a performance, very cute

aes-rizzle is actually extremely hot in pers, and like 9 feet tall (and hangs out at the Garnier Fructis stand?!?!)

dj shadow is mysterious! he disappears and then suddenly appears onstage! maybe it's just that no one knows what he actually looks like

tortoise are OLD. nonshocker. they have the guy from 90 Day Men playing with them now. i recognized him from this, and asked "where you in 90 day men?" and all the torti loled.

asked ziggy marley where he got his cigarettes and his entourage gasped

t00l were RIDICULOUS (in the best poss way), Maynard G. Krebs just made hippie jabs between every song, and bragged about being able to use soap in his air conditioned trailer. everyone cheered anyway, 90,000 people. why do hippies like t00l? it's such sinister sounding stuff. my friend chris says they just call that kind of thing "deep" or "heavy", and like to prove that they "can get into 'deep' stuff too."

More grumpy goodness ensues, including Lily Allen's non-surprising drunkenness, and the immortal words "Wolfmother? talk about pricks."

anyone up in this piece go to bonnaroo? [ilxor.com]
[Photo by Getty Images]

- First, the band news: Ornette Coleman collapsed from heat stroke during his set on Sunday, but he appears to be OK. [Billboard]
- The Police: Awesome! [NYTimes]
- The Police: Awful! [LATimes Buzz Bands]
- David Cross, Lily Allen and Gov't Mule's Warren Haynes got into a possibly spirited back-and-forth about hippies. [Spinner.com]
- The guy from the Long Winteres stuck it to that Ben Harper dude! [MSNBC]
- By day two, things got smelly. But at least Wayne Coyne pulled out the Page-style double-necker. [EW]
- ?uestlove will gladly pose for a photo, but he damn sure isn't going to give it more than a half-smile. [Loudersoft]

[Photo: Getty Images]

I'm going to Bonnaroo you should not and get my tea ready - 24

guess I'm a little out there...maybe geeky but i think I'm sexy. I'm a musician with a keen sense for the insane but am grounded with a good job and career and crazy laughs and spontaneous times will be had..i prefer P.R or latina girls who listen to ill rock..punk or otherwise..I'm spanish but look irish...race doesn't matter but curves help...try something diffrent trust me I'm no cheap date...love the old booze cruise

Wait—a booze cruise-loving, lady-chasing, "insane but grounded" musician? Is Kid Rock looking for a rideshare?

I'm going to Bonnaroo you should not and get my tea ready - 24 [Craigslist]

The full lineup—which includes the already-announced Police, as well as Tool, Widespread Panic, Wilco, the White Stripes, and a bunch of jam bands—after the jump.

The Police
Tool
Widespread Panic
The White Stripes
Ben Harper & the Innocent Criminals
Flaming Lips
Wilco
Manu Chao
The String Cheese Incident
Franz Ferdinand
Bob Weir & Ratdog
Damien Rice
Ween
The Roots
Gov't Mule
Ziggy Marley & the Melody Makers
The Decemberists
Kings of Leon
Spearhead
Wolfmother
Regina Spektor
The Black Keys
DJ Shadow
Gillian Welch & David Rawlings
Spoon
Keller Williams
Sasha & Digweed
STS9
Old Crow Medicine Show
The Hold Steady
Galactic
Lily Allen
North Mississippi Allstars
Fountains Of Wayne
Hot Tuna
Feist
Hot Chip
John Butler Trio
Ralph Stanley & the Clinch Mountain Boys
Aesop Rock
The Richard Thompson Band
Xavier Rudd
Tortoise
T-Bone Burnett
Mavis Staples
Clutch
Cold War Kids
Paolo Nutini
Brazilian Girls
RX Bandits
The Slip
Girl Talk
Railroad Earth
Martha Wainright
Rodrigo y Gabriela
Annuals
Tea Leaf Green
Sam Roberts Band
Elvis Perkins in Dearland
Charlie Louven
Sonya Kitchell
Apollo Sunshine
Ryan Shaw
Uncle Earl
The National
The Little Ones

Bonnaroo 2007 | Lineup Leaked [Live Music Blog]
Bonnaroo | Music & Arts Festival | 2007 [Official site]