It's no secret that Friedman is buddy-buddy with the recently shoved-aside Sony BMG executive Clive Davis; Friedman has devoted many a pixel to praising the aging exec and his Grammy-party-hosting old-biz ways. (A recent example: Friday's news that Sony BMG had bumped Davis aside prompted Friedman to say "the record business is just about over... with Clive removed from the picture on a daily basis, the end is one step nearer.") While it's unclear whether or not Davis' new position as "chief creative officer" will result in him being as involved with Idol winners' albums as he's been in previous years, it's not too much of a stretch to think that Davis, whose most recent success has come with the blandly spooky Leona Lewis, would be unnerved by Cook's not-all-that-edgy "edginess," especially when a) he wasn't so into Kelly Clarkson's attempt to take a similar tack and b) the (perhaps delusional) promise of teenpop money from David Archuleta's screaming fans seems so close.

My guess is that this will all come to a head on the Idol season finale, when Cook is forced to mug his way through the treacly coronation song while Archuleta smiles and wets his lips throughout his performance—you know, sort of like what happened last year, only this time I'm pretty sure that David Cook will actually sell albums once all is said and done.

'Idol' Singer a Ringer? David Cook's Album Already Out [Fox 411]
David Cook — "Analog Heart" Pulled from Amazon.com! [rickey.org]
David Cook's Analog Heart Pulled From Amazon [MJ's Big Blog]

More conspiracizing after the jump!

So instead, they wait until tickets are already on sale to announce Zeppelin— but they also float the idea out there informally, as a "wink wink, nudge nudge" to the fans that follow live music closely. Even better, they book LEZ Zeppelin so that they can point to a specific point that's causing all the confusion.

I also think that if this is the case, it was genius to announce the lineup at midnight. The drama/confusion plays out overnight, rather than during the day when everyone is at work checking the internet. By the morning, they knew all this would be cleared up— and tickets will go on sale with a normal health demand.

Bonnaroo tickets will sell out regardless, like they have the past few years. They don't need to announce Zeppelin on day 1.

I know it's a long shot, I know it's a crazy complicated conspiracy theory. But it's also EXACTLY the way to work the situation if it's true.

Hmm. Hmmmm! It sounds crazy enough to be sorta... plausible?

Earlier: A Roach's comment
[Photo: AP]

Using The Mars Volta as a guinea pig for a new media experiment is potentially disastrous, too...seriously, why is UMI giving these guys such a long leash to confuse and obfuscate with their proven track record of being unable to release anything but middling concept records? Give me one more perfect song like "The Widow" and my faith will be restored. You probably thought it couldn't get any worse after Amputechture, right? Oh my.

Maybe I'm just a sucker for crazy drum rolls and falsetto ululations, but I don't find The Bedlam In Goliath as objectionable as the Decibel braintrust does. (In fact, I think it's the MV's best, least wankiest offering since De-Loused.) And I also do not share their worry that Universal's investment will be necessarily be unrecoupable. Unlike some of their labelmates, the Mars Volta's pop profile may still have them playing theaters, but they're selling out enough of those medium-sized venues that I was pwned myself when I tried to see them in Philly earlier this week. Relying on a cult act with committed fanbase in the tens or hundreds of thousands (hell, I don't even like leaving the house for cigarettes this time of year) is actually pretty sound strategy for a label of any size these days, even if said label still can't resist trying to fleece that fanbase with valueless add-ons. If Bedlam does tank, however, the quickest fix is clear: A T-Pain remix. The obviousness of which is perhaps the only explanation for why UMG overlooked it in the first place.

You Got Pwned [Deciblog]

instantlove: do we not think this was mtv's plan all along—for britney to fail?
mauraatidolator: you think?
instantlove: well everyone's talking about the mtv awards, certainly more than in years past i would say
mauraatidolator: hmmm
instantlove: CONSPIRACY
mauraatidolator: so it's like the sort of response to the tmzization of culture? i like where this is going
instantlove: i mean the woman prepped for like three days, she's clearly a wreck
mauraatidolator: yeah
instantlove: mtv was like, good or bad we want to see it happen
instantlove: i actually think there was a lot of bizarre/interesting stuff going on last night. the girls from the hills as big stars, and then justin timberlake slamming reality tv as he accepts the award from them. everything the foo fighters did, and fall out boy was trying to work it out so hard that i think they get extra bonus points.
instantlove: it was a fucking mess, but sometimes that's interesting
instantlove: but that's totally tmz
mauraatidolator: they tried to bring the incoherence of the internet to tv

If anything, the incessant Internetization of this year's Video Music Awards—the Twittering, the Second Life-ing, the "watch the full performances online!" exhortations—makes this hypothesis completely plausible; MTV has, after all, seemed nothing short of desperate for attention with this installment of the show, and coupling that desperation with the idea that all press is good press could have created quite the toxic stew, if you'll pardon the pun. (You need look no further than the pageview counts for all of our VMA-related stories in the past 24 hours to realize that people are, in fact, seeking out news on this show whether they watched it or not, and whether they're fans of Britney or not.) It seems pretty cruel, but that's also sort of why it seems plausible—after all, any network that actually put on the shitshow that was last night isn't really feeling altruistic towards its fellow media consumers, is it now.

Earlier: Idolator's 2007 Video Music Awards coverage: Gimme gimme more, gimme gimme more