ONE-LISTEN REVIEW: While it's nowhere as strikingly crass Buckcherry's new "Too Drunk To Fuck" — lines like "it's kind of cool, because she already pleased me" almost feel quaint in comparison — Hinder's upcoming single song rocks a lot more convincingly, sounding like a high-gloss, less shrieky AC/DC, which really couldn't be said for "Lips Of An Angel." If this cartoonish cock rock fails to reach a large audience, I'm sure they've got a ballad chock full of simpering regret waiting in the wings.

WHERE YOU CAN FIND IT: Hasn't shown up on YouTube yet, but Rest In Peace has it for download.

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: Hills star Heidi Montag may have aspirations toward the lucrative Christian-pop scene, but for now she's happy to sing about "getting lost in this liquid high," and being one drink away from losing her better judgment. Ethical questions about an MTV star promoting drunken hook-ups aside ("last call for alcohol/ I'm feeling clumsy, about to fall..."), the song is a big step-up from "Fashion," and recommended to fans of Britney Spears' Blackout (which would also be a good name for a sequel to this track). Really, all that's missing from this is an opening "...HEIDI!"

WHERE TO FIND IT: You can easily find streams on YouTube, and Ali's Blog has a download.

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: Girl, you're lonely and you think nobody understands your pain. But you're wrong. Akon understands. And Michael Jackson? He understands too. So just take their hands and let them fly you away from all this misery. For if there's one place you'll be happy, it's resting safely with Akon and Michael Jackson on the serene island paradise that is this sweet, forgettable "Don't Matter"-esque ballad. And once R. Kelly gets a whiff of the track, I'm sure he'll come diving into the hot tub on the remix. ("Hold my hand toooo!") Darius Rucker will probably have to wait for the mash-up.

WHERE TO FIND IT: All over YouTube.

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: This song has been on the tracklisting of Eve's Here I Am for ages, following label changes and aborted promotional activities. Vh1 published an interview with Eve about this specific collaboration almost exactly a year ago, so it's surprising the song has been able to remain any kind of secret. And while it's a solid track, with Robin Thicke aptly playing the role of Eve's seducer, it's hard to believe something this mellow is going to succeed the way the album's first single "Tambourine" did in early 2007 (sigh). Too assertive to be a sex kitten and too mature for her old gangsta persona, it's doubtful there's much of a market for Eve unless Swizz Beatz hands her a party.

WHERE YOU CAN FIND IT: Music Is The Heart Of Our Soul,

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: The album opens with Pharrell describing the origins of his synethesia before the band whispers "It's time for some action" over a beat that's thankfully more In Search Of... than Fly Or Die, while being In My Mind enough that folks who didn't enjoy Skateboard P's solo debut may not react positively. Despite tighter beats on songs like "Yeah You" and the discofied "You Know What," N*E*R*D is still the Neptunes' Ween-like rock reference move: "Windows" could be the Knack; the verse of "Happy" is like later Morrissey on helium. Sure, the vocals are reliably groan-worthy and the band still seems to think that bridges must stop the groove and transform a track entirely rather than build upon the verse, but if you can't handle these queasy qualities, you probably gave up on N*E*R*D a long time ago. It's hard to say which tracks will improve with time or wind up subsumed by the quirk, but the improved danceability compared to Fly Or Die is promising, and I can't think of a N*E*R*D album that had more immediately enjoyable music moments than this already has.

WHERE TO HEAR IT: Music Is The Heart Of Our Soul has it zipped.

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: Wow, Oasis are seriously changing up the game on our asses. You'd think this was the Dukes Of Stratosphear or something, the way they've suddenly started taking on Beatle-isms! "Nothing On Me" mixes brash guitars and snide, Lennon-esque vocals from Liam Gallagher that plead for "truth." "I Wanna Live A Dream" flows from wan acoustic strumming with Noel Gallagher's blank vocals into a stomping, psychedelic coda familiar to fans of homages to "I Am The Walrus." "Stomp The Clocks" also flows from wan acoustic strumming topped by Noel Gallagher's blank vocals into a stomping, but the volume takes a lot longer to rise, and when the drums suddenly crash in, followed by a loud guitar solo, it's really more of a classic Radiohead-type of thing. I guess that's progress?

NEW OASIS SONGS [MySpace via Independent Music]

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: Only months after American Gangster comes "Ain't I," apparently off the mysterious Blueprint 3 (forthcoming album? mixtape? USB stick?), a track where the recently emancipated CEO claims that he "took a pay cut to become an exec/so the next motherfucker can earn his paycheck" while giving the hairy eyeball to anyone claiming his lukewarm comeback attempts have knocked him from the position of being your favorite rapper's rapper, flashing a little of the haughty (but not terminally self-satisfied) snarl we last heard on The Black Album. You don't walk away quite buying his assertion, but it's also Jay's first reaffirmation of his godhood in some time where it doesn't sound like he's grinding through the cocky motions for a paycheck he last needed sometime in 1996. The Timbaland beat likewise ditches the big, blocky Euro synth riffs of his recent career renaissance for an intricate early '00s throwback that combines the thump of "Dirt Off Your Shoulder," the bubbling hand drums of This Is Not A Test-era Missy, an eerie keyboard peal, and a snatch of metal guitar. Possibly a rebuff aimed at rap critics who worry Tim's trend towards lady-friendly dance-pop means he's lost his way as a hip-hop producer, those bummed by his non-stop late-decade beatboxing will nonetheless frown about 2:40 in, when the track shifts to a muddy 30 second mouth-music breakdown that kills the momentum.

Jay-Z - "Ain't I" [Nah Right]

ONE-LISTEN VERDICT: As on Food And Liquor, and leaving aside conceptual decisions like rapping "from the perspective of a cheeseburger," Chi-town native Lupe's still best when flowing over beats that could have been scratched together in a Brooklyn basement or Queens bedroom when he was supposedly listening to Eightball and MJG in junior high, like the amber-colored electric pianos of "Paris, Tokyo," which sound lifted from the same '70s sample stack Tribe was rifling through on Midnight Marauders, or the stabby '90s underground dynamics and funk guitar lick of "Gold Watch."

But since he's a guy who's a vocal fan of Linkin Park and who has publicly rubbished his indebtedness to the Native Tongues in favor of hardcore southern rap, most of The Cool is filled with funk-free new-school beats laced with characterless R&B hooks and Fiasco attempting a double-time flow his voluble mouth can't handle. Or (worse), they're "experimental" tracks where an overly ambitious Fiasco mistakes by-the-numbers mainstream rock moves for bold departures from the urban radio norm. The politically tinged "Hello Goodbye" is a rock tune, right down to Lupe grunting "huh!" over the karaoke-band guitar solo on the outro, but while we're all for cross-genre fusions, aping the sound of late-'90s industrial/rap-rock is not a good look for such a clever dude.

THE BEST TRACK: After the aforementioned "Paris, Tokyo" and "Gold Watch," the downcast "The Coolest" has somber strings and a piano plunking between the beat that reminds me why I loved the wistful "Kick, Push" so much, even if he still can't resist rapping nonsense like "drink the tears from her eyes." We know "wipe" would have been too easy, but c'mon now.