Anono-Prick passed on assessing the March and April issues of Vibe. He recalls glancing at the former and thinking that it didn't look very interesting; as for the latter, he thought that it was kinda lame that the mag went with a Lil Wayne cover story less than six months after the guy led their November issue. AP wanted to be generous to Vibe this time around.

So the June 2008 Vibe, which is intended to herald the summer, appears with none other than the patron saint of all outerborough broads on the cover. Mariah Carey, make no mistake, still sells records—at a time in which expectations for sales of tangible recorded product dwindle down further and further, she commands something like a consensus. Fortyish hausfraus remember "Vision of Love" fondly, their younger, cougar-ish sisters and cousins still dance to "Fantasy" at the club, and their daughters either prize her influence on American Idol contestants or contemplate twisting around the pole to the strains of "Touch My Body." And all manner of dudes would not, shall we say, turn that shit down. (AP digs most of her singles a ton; "One Sweet Day" with Boyz II Men is his fave.)

Vibe can't go wrong, right? You'd think that the mag would send a scribe to follow Carey around for a bit and perhaps extract some clues that she was very serious about Nick Cannon, the actor/rapper described in the story as a "recent acquaintance" and whom she married a month after the events described in this issue took place?

No dice. There is no evidence in "Body Language," the piece accompanying the cover, that Ms. Carey consented to anything vaguely resembling an interview with the piece's writer, associate editor Shanel Odum. In her editor's letter, EIC Danyel Smith describes a delegation including herself, Odum, fashion editor Memsor Kamarake, and photo editor Robyn Forest traipsing off to Antigua, where Carey celebrated her birthday and where the reporting and the photo shoot for this story transpired.

Odum employs mucho purple prose in depicting the firestorm that ensues amongst Carey's handlers in the run-up to a photo shoot, how Carey comports herself during the shoot itself, and how much she, her nephew, Cannon and bunch of other folks enjoyed themselves during her lavish birthday celebration that evening. Odum records one solitary quote from Carey, during the shoot, in which she requests different lighting.

And that's it: the mag's readers are supposed to be satisfied with a few words regarding Odum's five hours in Carey's general, but very fabulous, vicinity.

It's hard to understand how Smith, an editor whose first time at the rodeo was many years ago (she alludes to her own audience with a more forthcoming Carey for a Vibe story a decade ago in her editor's letter), could possibly stand for her writer being denied significant access to the subject of her magazine's cover story. She had to have known this would be a dog of a story, notwithstanding what might have been a pleasant trip for her and her staffers.

If a celebrity is awarded the cover of a entertainment magazine, then that celebrity will consent to at least fifteen minutes of innocuous conversation with a reporter for the magazine. Perhaps the reporter will try to solicit an interesting quote, which a celebrity of Carey's caliber will do their level best to bat away. At least that's been the prevailing modus operandi for entertainment journalism for the past twenty years, but maybe Smith and her peers are adjusting to the following, emerging facts:

1. superstars will grant the access they feel like at a particular time;
2. vague access is better than no access;
3. superstars are not afraid of alienating particular music magazines, a double-fucked species of cultural commerce; and
4. editorial muckety-mucks can go jump in the lake if they don't like any of the above.

Indeed, it could be that Carey's surrogates dicked Smith and her retinue around, or it could be that Smith agreed to the Carey camp's contention that she would not speak directly to a Vibe writer—although this seems inconceivable to AP. It could also be that Smith knows that her group left Antigua with something much, much more important than a record of Carey's current state of mind. Namely, they left with photographs of Carey arching her back and frolicking in three expensive swimsuits while on the beach. This, more than evidence of a fleeting conversation, was Smith's primary quarry in Antigua, and the consequences would have been far more grave should she have returned without it.

Otherwise, the June issue includes a list of the top "summer bangers" (and runners-ups) of the past decade, of which AP can only say that from May to September 2006 he heard Chamillionaire's "Ridin' Dirty" a helluva lot more than he heard T.I.'s "What You Know" on the radio. And "It's Murder," an oral history regarding Irv Gotti's Murder Inc., the gangsta pop idiom Gotti proffered in the early '00s, and feuds with both federal government and with 50 Cent, is mildly interesting, if premised on the shaky notion that Gotti's hitmaking acumen is undimmed.

In Ms. Smith's editor's letter, she paraphrases ODB's fabled verse on Carey's "Fantasy": "Vibe and Mariah do go back like babies and pacifiers." AP supposes that's not far back enough to ensure that the writer of the cover story for her magazine was granted at least a brief conversation upon which a semi-credible profile could be constructed. Smith's editor's letters have alluded to at best the opacity and at worst the uncooperative attitudes of the people on her magazine's covers. Perhaps it would have been impolitic to candidly discuss what seems like a gratuitous insult from Camp Carey, but AP would have appreciated a bit of transparency from Smith on this matter.

But, like AP said above, Smith got the most important things she needed in Antigua: several photographs of Mariah Carey in a number of bathing suits.

What's interesting is that in the "sneak peak" (sigh) of the article given by Vibe editor-in-chief Danyel Smith, there isn't one mention of weight loss, unless the reference to Einstein's 1905 paper "Does The Inertia of a Body Depend Upon Its Energy Content?" is a sly way of mentioning the incisive look at Mimi's daily caloric intake-to-activity ratio that this story will supply. Ah, talk about missed opportunities! I for one would love to watch as yet another music magazine gets swallowed up by the public's lack of interest in music and increasing trainwrecky fascination with the celebrity-industrial complex in real time.

Me And Mariah [Vibe]

Biggest Debuts: Aside from the debuts in the 3, 4, and 5 slots, ivory-tickling country singer Phil Vassar's Prayer Of A Common Man entered the chart at No. 10, selling 27,000 copies; St. Louis punkers Story Of The Year came in at No. 18 with Black Swan (21,000); and the awfully named outfit the Weepies, who are apparently big with the Grey's Anatomy set, debuted at No. 31 with 14,000 sales of Hideaway—and 11,000 of those were digital, putting them at No. 4 on the Digital Albums chart. (That particular chart was topped by Flight Of The Conchords, which was downloaded 24,000 times.) See? TV!

Notable Jumps: Michael Buble's Call Me Irresponsible had a 65% sales gain and leapt from No. 46 to No. 19 (20,000 sold).

Dropping Off: She held on to the top spot in the face of not much competition, but Mariah Carey's E=MC² took a 61% week-to-week sales hit, which means that she'll probably be in at least the No. 2 position on next week's album charts.

Nickelback Award For Inexplicable Durability: I don't know about you, but if someone had told me that Rick Ross would be the only mainstream hip-hop artist hanging tough with a top 20 album right now? Sure, it's only been seven weeks since Trilla (No. 15, 23,000) came out, but Snoop Dogg's Ego Trippin' came out the same week and that album is all the way down at No. 35 (13,000).

The top 20, with sales totals in parentheses:
1. Mariah Carey, E=MC² (182,000)
2. Leona Lewis, Spirit (96,000).
3. Flight Of The Conchords (52,000)
4. Ashlee Simpson, Bittersweet World (47,000)
5. Atmosphere, When Life Gives You Lemons You Paint That Shit Gold (36,000)
6. Now 27 (32,000)
7. Juno soundtrack (31,000)
8. George Strait, Troubadour (29,000)
9. Taylor Swift (27,000)
10. Phil Vassar, Prayer Of A Common Man (27,000)
11. Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus, Best Of Both Worlds Concert (26,000)
12. Alvin & The Chipmunks soundtrack (25,000)
13. James Otto, Sunset Man (24,000)
14. Jack Johnson, Sleep Through The Static (24,000)
15. Rick Ross, Trilla (23,000)
16. Lady Antebellum (22,000)
17. R.E.M., Accelerate (21,000)
18. Story Of The Year, Black Swan (21,000)
19. Michael Buble, Call Me Irresponsible (20,000)
20. Jordin Sparks (19,000)

All who wish to attend this atrocious publicity stunt should be at the Empire State Building lobby tomorrow at 1:00 p.m. for the lighting ceremony, which is bound to be one of the most cringe-worthy things to occur in New York City since the great Taco Bell rat infestation of '07.

Empire State Building to Light Iconic Tower Lights for International Superstar Mariah Carey [PR Newswire]

Biggest Debuts: The new country band Lady Antebellum entered the big chart at No. 4 and the Country Albums chart at No. 1, with their self-titled debut selling 43,000 copies. Meanwhile, Thrice's Vol. 3-4: The Alchemy Index and Rush's Snakes & Arrows Live each sold 21,000 copies in their opening weeks, with Thrice coming in at No. 17 on the big board and Rush entering at No. 18.

Notable Jumps: Even though I found her completely irritating and smug when she was co-hosting last week's CMT Awards, Miley Cyrus' TV appearance spurred a big jump in sales of her live album (which she shares credit on with her alter ego, Hannah Montana). The Best Of Both Worlds Concert had a 162% sales leap and sold 47,000 copies, which was enough for it to land at No. 3 for the week. Other post-CMT Awards bumps were much more modest: Taylor Swift hopped 13% (26,000 sold, No. 10), Sugarland's Enjoy The Ride inched up 16% (12,000 sold, No. 47), and Leann Rimes' Family reappeared on the chart at No. 178 (4,000 sold, up 22%). And despite taking away three awards during the evening, Kellie Pickler's sales didn't jump enough to bring her back to the top 200 albums chart.

Dropping Off: Leona Lewis' Spirit was off 54%, but thanks to yet another weak sales week (seriously, I should get a macro for this), her 95,000-copy tally was enough for her to take the No. 2 spot.

Nickelback Award For Inexplicable Durability: Every week that the Alvin & The Chipmunks soundtrack is in the top 10 is yet another week that I shake my head and despair for the future of this world. (It's at No. 7 this week, having sold 32,000 copies—which means that it's sold only 623,000 so far. Why does it seem like it's been around so much longer?)

The top 20, with sales totals in parentheses:
1. Mariah Carey, E=MC² (463,000)
2. Leona Lewis, Spirit (95,000)
3. Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus, The Best Of Both Worlds Concert (47,000)
4. Lady Antebellum (43,000)
5. Now 27 (39,000)
6. George Strait, Troubadour (38,000)
7. Alvin & The Chipmunks soundtrack (32,000)
8. Juno soundtrack (31,000)
9. R.E.M., Accelerate (30,000)
10. Taylor Swift (30,000)
11. Rick Ross, Trilla (27,000)
12. James Otto, Sunset Man (26,000)
13. Jack Johnson, Sleep Through The Static (25,000)
14. Danity Kane, Welcome To The Dollhouse (23,000)
15. Daughtry (23,000)
16. Jordin Sparks (23,000)
17. Thrice, Vol. 3-4: The Alchemy Index (21,000)
18. Rush, Snakes & Arrows Live (21,000)
19. Sara Bareilles, Little Voice (20,000)
20. Gnarls Barkley, The Odd Couple (20,000)

• "And yet Carey remains a romantic at heart. With the ballads 'Love Story' and 'Last Kiss,' she reunites with Dupri to recapture the passionate splendor of 2005's 'We Belong Together.' It's unfortunate, then, that E=MC2 closes with its only missteps, the somber elegy 'Bye Bye'—an odd choice for the follow-up single to the cheeky hit 'Touch My Body'—and the preachy gospel hymn 'I Wish You Well' (this CD's version of Emancipation's 'Fly Like a Bird'). Still, for an artist whose career was all but dead four years ago, Carey is wise to play it safe by building on the finest elements of her last CD. Were it not for the final two tracks, she could've gotten away with calling this album Treasure. A-" [EW]
• "Verbose to the point of opulence, she crams syllables into the verses, races against her own emotions and perfectly conveys the song's claustrophobic intensity. When she sings elsewhere, 'Them other regularities, they can't compare with MC,' it is hard not to agree." [Guardian]
• "Much of the record sounds like urban-radio imitations, without the peculiarities and effective hooks of Mimi. Maybe emancipation isn't a continuing procedure; maybe it only comes once. " [NYT]
• "Throughout the 14 tracks Carey generally flattens whatever melodies peek out with her signature agitated little vocal fillips. This is terrific for fluttering, hand-gesture accompaniment but keeps the tunes from being truly infectious. E=MC2 feels like the subtly prettier identical twin of Emancipation of Mimi, as if for Carey freedom's just another word for doing the same thing again." [Boston Globe]
• "Indeed, Carey sounds less like a diva than ever on E-MC2. Instead, she's just another serviceable part on a factory-produced, state-of-the-art pop album." [Chicago Tribune]

For all their popularity the world over, songs by Radiohead haven't exactly set the charts alight. (Even in their homeland: they've never scored a U.K. No. 1.) In part that's due to their status as a top-tier album act; fans would sooner buy the full-length than an individual track.

But it's also a function of Radiohead's erratic approach to singles. Sometimes they pack singles with invaluable B-sides for collectors; sometimes songs are only serviced to radio—and that includes some of the band's catchiest tunes ("Let Down," "Bodysnatchers").

This week, we have evidence that Radiohead should release singles more often—or at least, release them in pieces. They score only the second U.S. Top 40 hit of their career, with one of the least catchy songs on the catchier-than-usual In Rainbows.

"Nude" debuts on the Billboard Hot 100 at No. 37, instantly becoming their biggest hit since "Creep" made No. 34 in 1993. Honestly, though, the two hits aren't remotely comparable in terms of popularity. "Nude" achieves this high chart placement thanks to Radiohead releasing the song as a remix project, and asking rabid fans to pay 99 cents for each piece of the mix. Which they dutifully did.

"Nude" was released to iTunes on April 1 in six parts: the full song, plus separate stem tracks for voice, guitars, bass, drums and "String FX Etc." Each piece sells separately—something of a departure from the band's "pay what you want" ethic. If you want to create your own remix of "Nude," you probably have to spend six bucks to acquire all the pieces. (Although there is some evidence that a few fans skipped one or more parts—can't wait to hear what a drumless mix sounds like!)

The results, in week one: the original song sold just under 13,000 copies, and each of the four stems sold between about 9,200 and 9,800 copies. (If you're curious: the vocal stem sold best, then guitars, strings/effects, drums; as in life, bass pulls up the rear.) Total sales for all six pieces combined were just shy of 60,000.

Billboard had to make a policy decision for "Nude." When the original iTunes sales were tallied by SoundScan, the original song plus each stem were logged and charted separately. But for Hot 100 purposes—in keeping with Billboard's tendency to treat it as a "songs" chart, not a "tracks" chart—"Nude" is charting in one cumulative position, which makes it look bigger than it is. If the original song, sans stems, were to chart by itself, it would have made No. 96 on the digital sales chart and likely would have missed the Hot 100 entirely.

As a chart fan, there's one way to look at this that's a bit cynical, and one that's more optimistic. You could look at this as chart pollution—since when is a bass loop a legitimate proxy for a hit single? It's as if Radiohead is propping up a minor hit by finding a loophole through U.S. chart policy, not unlike the 2004 Prince album that was allowed to include free copies handed out at concerts in its Billboard tally, and charted much higher than it should have.

On the other hand, it's pretty obvious this chart event wasn't the intention of Radiohead's multi-mix release strategy. And it's undeniable that, as usual, they're coming up with innovative ways to get fans excited about actually paying something for music.

I'll just say this: right now, I'll bet Mariah Carey's people are meeting to discuss how they can make this multiple-stems remix gimmick work to their chart advantage. Keep an eye out for "Bye Bye," the drum loop, coming to iTunes this summer.

Here's a rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• More seriously, Mariah's No. 1 for a second week with "Touch My Body," but you might not guess from glancing at the Top 10 below just how vicious the competition in the Top Five has been. After surrendering the No. 1 spot last week, Leona Lewis isn't retreating without a fight—"Bleeding Love" is back up two spaces to No. 2, thanks to a comeback in her digital sales (up 9% to 198,000) and a surge in airplay (top 10 most-played for the first time). More to the point, Carey's digital sales have cratered surprisingly quickly: she's down 42% from last week's record-setting download sum (163,000 copies, from 282,000 in the prior frame) and now ranked fourth in digital sales. Only Carey's massive airplay, second only to Usher's, helps her retain the No. 1 position overall.

• Here at Idolator, we may have decided that Madonna's single with the two Tims is gimmicky and barely worthy as background noise. But to the public, it's a hit: "4 Minutes" achieves the rare feat of maintaining its sales total one week after a massive debut, holding at a stunning 217,000 copies. As a result, "4 Minutes" by Madonna featuring Justin Timberlake is now the top-selling song in the country and bullets at No. 3 on the Hot 100. Its radio airplay, while growing, is still well out of range, but watch out—if Mariah's sales continue to collapse and Leona can't claw her way back to No. 1, Madge could slip into the No. 1 slot in another week or two. Unless Weezy gets there first...

• Lil Wayne's "Lollipop" is the final scrapper in the Top Five, up three more notches to No. 4. Billboard rewards it with the week's "Sales Gainer" prize, thanks to its surge to 173,000 copies. And Weezy has a much smaller radio handicap than Madge, as "Lollipop" swells in airplay to become the 11th most-played song in the country (he's helped by R&B/Hip-Hop airplay, as evidenced by his leap into the Top 10 on that mostly-airplay chart). Bottom line, the battle for No. 1 is about to get interesting.

• On the sleepy-ass Modern Rock chart, there's a new No. 1, the strange appeal of which our man Al discussed weeks ago. But the real action is below the Top 10, where two songs from returning bands make big leaps just outside the winners' circle. The Raconteurs surge 15 places to No. 11 with "Salute Your Solution," likely thanks to the band's erratically released album finally getting into most radio programmers' hands. Right behind them: "I Will Possess Your Heart," the preview single from Death Cab for Cutie's forthcoming album Narrow Stairs, which speeds 10 places to No. 12.

• I'm not supposed to discuss album charts here, but we didn't get to run a "Who Charted?" this week, and I can't resist: Van Morrison has his first Top 10 album. No, not in the SoundScan era—ever. His highest charter prior to this week's No. 10 debut by Keep It Simple was the No. 15 peak of 1972's St. Dominic's Preview. Boy, you know the sales bar is low when elderly rock gods begin to chart like pop stars...

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses:

Hot 100
1. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 1, 8 weeks)
2. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 4, 8 weeks)
3. Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake, "4 Minutes" (LW No. 3, 3 weeks)
4. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 7, 4 weeks)
5. Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club" (LW No. 2, 8 weeks)
6. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 6, 10 weeks)
7. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 5, 14 weeks)
8. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 8, 19 weeks)
9. Sara Bareilles, "Love Song" (LW No. 9, 23 weeks)
10. Flo Rida feat. T-Pain, "Low" (LW No. 10, 24 weeks)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club" (LW No. 1, 9 weeks)
2. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 3, 9 weeks)
3. Keyshia Cole, "I Remember" (LW No. 2, 23 weeks)
4. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 4, 13 weeks)
5. The-Dream, "Falsetto" (LW No. 5, 18 weeks)
6. J. Holiday, "Suffocate" (LW No. 8, 27 weeks)
7. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 15, 4 weeks)
8. Alicia Keys, "Like You'll Never See Me Again" (LW No. 6, 24 weeks)
9. Mario, "Crying Out for Me" (LW No. 7, 33 weeks)
10. Rick Ross feat. T-Pain, "The Boss" (LW No. 11, 13 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. Trace Adkins, "You're Gonna Miss This" (LW No. 1, 18 weeks)
2. George Strait, "I Saw God Today" (LW No. 2, 9 weeks)
3. Chris Cagle, "What Kinda Gone" (LW No. 3, 38 weeks)
4. James Otto, "Just Got Started Lovin' You" (LW No. 5, 25 weeks)
5. Taylor Swift, "Picture to Burn" (LW No. 7, 13 weeks)
6. Jason Aldean, "Laughed Until We Cried" (LW No. 6, 35 weeks)
7. Alan Jackson, "Small Town Southern Man" (LW No. 4, 22 weeks)
8. Phil Vassar, "Love Is A Beautiful Thing" (LW No. 10, 23 weeks)
9. Rascal Flatts, "Every Day" (LW No. 11, 7 weeks)
10. Brad Paisley, "I'm Still a Guy" (LW No. 12, 7 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Puddle of Mudd, "Psycho" (LW No. 2, 23 weeks)
2. Foo Fighters, "Long Road to Ruin" (LW No. 1, 24 weeks)
3. Seether, "Rise Above This" (LW No. 4, 7 weeks)
4. Atreyu, "Falling Down" (LW No. 3, 11 weeks)
5. The Bravery, "Believe" (LW No. 5, 27 weeks)
6. 3 Doors Down, "It's Not My Time" (LW No. 7, 7 weeks)
7. Foo Fighters, "The Pretender" (LW No. 8, 36 weeks)
8. Panic at the Disco, "Nine in the Afternoon" (LW No. 10, 10 weeks)
9. Linkin Park, "Shadow of the Day" (LW No. 6, 27 weeks)
10. Ashes Divide, "The Stone" (LW No. 13, 11 weeks)

"Love Takes Time," her second No. 1 in America, didn't really take off anywhere else, especially compared to "Vision Of Love." I was honestly surprised to see this was a No. 1 while "Make It Happen" only made it to No. 5.

I can't say I really forgot the 1997 No. 1 "Honey," the Tommy Mottola-esque mobsters, or Carey sitting on Ma$e's lap in the remix, while he rapped about making her scream into a pillow. I did forget that, at 1:15, two years before Episode One, Eddie Griffin did a pretty good Jar Jar Binks.

"Thank God I Found You," featuring Joe and 98 Degrees, her 15th No. 1. I swear to God I've never heard this song before. Probably because no one's played it ever since.

Her next single features T-Pain, so she's only an Akon and a Sean Kingston from knocking the Beatles off their perch. You can do it, Mimi!

Carey nudges the king to one side [The Press Assocation]

As we previewed yesterday, Leona "Limey Mariah" Lewis has fulfilled our prediction from last week and shot to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100 with her debut single, "Bleeding Love."

But she's not the only newsmaker in the winners' circle. After one of the most stagnant winters in pop-chart history—just last week, the top seven records were unchanged—music lovers welcome spring by throwing a grenade into the middle of the Top 10, where songs scatter everywhere. The results: Lil Wayne has his first Top 10 hit as a lead artist, Lil Mama has her second, and an exceedingly tacky Ray J song is hurtling toward the top.

He'll have to wait, however, if he expects to crown the chart. Lewis is going to be replaced at No. 1 next week, but not by him.

First, a word about Weezy. "Lollipop," Lil Wayne's attempt to cash in on the T-Pain vocoder sound and the 50 Cent-style single-entendre, previews his long-delayed Tha Carter III with an actual Top 10 hit. Just two months ago, Wayne's supporting performance on Wyclef's "Sweetest Girl (Dollar Bill)" made it to No. 12; his highest charter to date as a supporting act was on Destiny's Child's No. 3 hit "Soldier" (2005). Frankly, both of those are better songs than "Lollipop," which features the recently deceased Static Major and not so much of the flow that makes Weezy a demigod. But at least he reaches the upper tier in style: the song makes this year's biggest move on the Hot 100, shooting 76 spots to No. 9 thanks to a fat debut on iTunes.

Until this week, the biggest jump of the year was last week's 73-place vault by Lil Mama's "Shawty Get Loose." Bucking the recent trend of songs that make a big move thanks to iTunes sales and then recede, "Shawty" has another great week and moves up another nine spots to No. 10, placing Lil Mama one space behind Lil Wayne and matching the peak position of last summer's "Lip Gloss."

Finally, Ray J's "Sexy Can I," the stupidest Top Three U.S. hit since "My Humps," now matches that song's peak position. It's right behind Lewis and Usher at No. 3, thanks to ever-growing airplay and digital sales blowing up by more than 50%. With its novelty lyrics and insidious hook, "Sexy" smells like the kind of fad hit that tops the charts from time to time, but if that's going to happen, it won't be anytime soon.

That's because Leona Lewis's forbear, Mariah Carey, is expected to fulfill her destiny next week and hurtle to No. 1 with the wispy, Jack-the-Page-fueled "Touch My Body." She will do it despite sliding one notch to No. 15 this week (she maintains her bullet), because the song's sales on iTunes are already explosive.

It'll be the least surprising leap to No. 1 from outside the Top 10 in chart history. And it will make chart history by putting Carey all alone in second place among acts with the most No. 1 hits, pulling her out of a tie with Elvis Presley and placing her just two smashes shy of the Beatles' all-time record.

Here's a rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• Even though we kind of saw it shaping up last week, the seven-notch leap to No. 1 by Lewis's "Bleeding Love" was something of a jaw-dropper. Usher's "Love in This Club" has been on a tear both in terms of sales and airplay (even as he falls to No. 2 this week, the song maintains its bullet), and Lewis's fat week of Oprah-fueled downloads might not have been enough to give her the edge. But radio helped: while Usher picked up more than 600 spins on monitored Top 40 stations last week, Lewis picked up over 700; he still leads her in airplay, but she's narrowed the gap considerably. That airplay plus her 219,000 buck-a-song downloads propel her to the top.

• What was the song of winter '08? Arguably, it wasn't Flo Rida's No. 1-hogging "Low," but rather the radio-burnout smash "Apologize" by OneRepublic (credited to producer Timbaland), which never reached the top slot but spent a staggering 25 weeks in the Top 10. That's not a record, but as Billboard chart columnist Fred Bronson points out, that's the longest any song has spent in the Top 10 since Santana's "Smooth" in 1999, which polluted our brains with Rob Thomas's white-boy mambo for 30 weeks.

It's somehow poetic that "Apologize" finally exits the Top 10 in the first chart following the onset of spring. But over at OneRepublic headquarters, they're still popping the bubbly: lead singer/songwriter Ryan Tedder cowrote "Bleeding Love," Leona Lewis's new No. 1. (The other writer: fellow moonlighting singer Jesse "Beautiful Soul" McCartney, who's also a moonlighting actor.)

• The Hot 100's highest debut of the week is yet another track by Flo Rida: "Roll," which has Sean Kingston backing him up, enters at No. 61. Uncle Flo's official followup single, "Elevator" with Timbaland, is back up at No. 19 but still hasn't matched its peak of No. 16 from three weeks ago. Both tracks benefit from the release of Flo Rida's album Mail on Sunday, but America must finally be sick of his original hit, "Low," because it's down in both sales and airplay.

• Other Hot 100 debutantes include "4 Minutes" by Madonna featuring Justin Timberlake (No. 68)—you can expect that song to shoot into the Top 10 next week, thanks to big iTunes sales; Ferras' American Idol-fueled "Hollywood's Not America" (No. 84); the presumptive second single from Gnarls Barkley's new album, "Going On" (No. 88); and Ne-Yo's "Go On Girl" (No. 96).

• Sam Endicott is having the last laugh: the Bravery, once dismissed as a Killers-imitating flash in the pan, is emerging as a staple modern-rock radio act. "Believe" is their biggest hit yet, elbowing into the Top Five on the Hot Modern Rock list and bubbling under the Hot 100. That sound you just heard was Brandon Flowers's ego shrinking a little.

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses:

Hot 100
1. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 8, 6 weeks)
2. Usher Featuring Young Jeezy, "Love In This Club" (LW No. 1, 6 weeks)
3. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 7, 8 weeks)
4. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 2, 17 weeks)
5. Sara Bareilles, "Love Song" (LW No. 4, 21 weeks)
6. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 6, 12 weeks)
3. Flo Rida feat. T-Pain, "Low" (LW No. 7, 22 weeks)
8. Rihanna, "Don't Stop the Music" (LW No. 5, 18 weeks)
9. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 85, 2 weeks)
10. Lil Mama feat. Chris Brown & T-Pain, "Shawty Get Loose" (LW No. 19, 5 weeks)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Keyshia Cole, "I Remember" (LW No. 1, 21 weeks)
2. Usher Featuring Young Jeezy, "Love In This Club" (LW No. 6, 7 weeks)
3. The-Dream, "Falsetto" (LW No. 3, 16 weeks)
4. Alicia Keys, "Like You'll Never See Me Again" (LW No. 2, 22 weeks)
5. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 11, 11 weeks)
6. Mario, "Crying Out for Me" (LW No. 9, 30 weeks)
7. J. Holiday, "Suffocate" (LW No. 4, 25 weeks)
8. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 10, 7 weeks)
9. Mary J. Blige, "Just Fine" (LW No. 5, 26 weeks)
10. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 7, 17 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. Alan Jackson, "Small Town Southern Man" (LW No. 1, 20 weeks)
2. Trace Adkins, "You're Gonna Miss This" (LW No. 3, 16 weeks)
3. Chris Cagle, "What Kinda Gone" (LW No. 6, 36 weeks)
4. George Strait, "I Saw God Today" (LW No. 7, 7 weeks)
5. Carrie Underwood, "All-American Girl" (LW No. 2, 17 weeks)
6. James Otto, "Just Got Started Lovin' You" (LW No. 9, 23 weeks)
7. Rodney Atkins, "Cleaning This Gun (Come on in Boy)" (LW No. 4, 27 weeks)
8. Jason Aldean, "Laughed Until We Cried" (LW No. 10, 33 weeks)
9. Taylor Swift, "Picture to Burn" (LW No. 11, 11 weeks)
10. Phil Vassar, "Love Is A Beautiful Thing" (LW No. 13, 21 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Foo Fighters, "Long Road to Ruin" (LW No. 1, 22 weeks)
2. Puddle of Mudd, "Psycho" (LW No. 2, 21 weeks)
3. Linkin Park, "Shadow of the Day" (LW No. 3, 25 weeks)
4. The Bravery, "Believe" (LW No. 7, 25 weeks)
5. Atreyu, "Falling Down" (LW No. 9, 9 weeks)
6. Seether, "Rise Above This" (LW No. 11, 5 weeks)
7. Seether, "Fake It" (LW No. 4, 30 weeks)
8. Foo Fighters, "The Pretender" (LW No. 6, 34 weeks)
9. Paramore, "crushcrushcrush" (LW No. 5, 19 weeks)
10. 3 Doors Down, "It's Not My Time" (LW No. 14, 5 weeks)

You thought Beyonce vs. Rihanna was an old school-new school catfight? We've got a better one.

British belter Leona Lewis hurtles 13 spots to No. 8 on Billboard's Hot 100 with "Bleeding Love." Already dubbed "the next Mariah Carey" by multiple news outlets since winning British television's The X Factor last fall, Lewis is now clearly making a fast break for No. 1 in America. And she's doing it at the very moment her melismatic model is herself on the way up. Within two to three weeks, we could be witnessing an epic diva battle for the top slot.

Whitney and Mariah's late '80s-early '90s rise was a little unsettling because of their respective record labels' military efficiency in breaking them on the U.S. charts. Whitney endured just one single that fell short of No. 1 ("You Give Good Love," No. 3, 1985) before laying waste to the last half of the decade with a string of chart-toppers. Mariah didn't even have to suffer through one subpar hit, shooting to No. 1 with her debut "Vision of Love" in 1990 and never looking back.

Clive Davis' protégé and Tommy Mottola's discovery came to power in an era of easily bought-and-sold charts, thanks to radio programmers territorialized by "indie" payola and retailers who could be nudged by label pressure or enticed to sell 49-cent loss-leader cassingles. Two decades later, with payola less overt and retail rapidly dying, it's hard to imagine another mass-appeal diva enjoying such a swift, coordinated march to U.S. chart dominance. (Even Celine Dion took longer to break and enjoyed far fewer U.S. hits.)

Well, imagine this: it is happening again. The campaign to break Lewis in America, coming on the heels of the swift dominance of her homeland, would put D-Day to shame. Labels might not be able to buy off radio and retail the way they used to, but they know how to deploy other influences.

Like Oprah Winfrey, Dion's erstwhile secret weapon. In an appearance on Oprah earlier this week with her mentor Simon Cowell, Lewis received the queen of all media's blessing ("a star is born," saith The O). The March 17 appearance didn't even directly affect this week's charts, but the surrounding promotion no doubt goosed "Bleeding's" numbers in the week leading up to it—radio plays shot up, and its sales doubled at iTunes. The setup for her album, dropping in America on April 8, couldn't be better planned.

"Bleeding Love" has been on the Hot 100 for five weeks, exactly the same number as Carey's "Touch My Body." When the two singles materialized on the charts a month ago, Carey debuted at No. 57 and Lewis down at No. 85. Both have made impressive chart moves since, but in the last couple of weeks, Carey has reached a momentary ceiling while Lewis has been vaulting about 20 notches a week. This week, Carey crawls up two spots to No. 14; Lewis sneaks around her, moving from just outside the Top 20 to inside the Top 10 in a single week.

Of course, as we pointed out here a couple of weeks ago, Carey continues to chart with a major handicap: no iTunes sales. But that'll change next Tuesday, when "Touch My Body" hits iTunes. Because of Billboard reporting delays, these sales won't affect the Hot 100 for another two weeks, but you can expect Carey to storm instantly to No. 1 at Apple's store. Which gives Lewis' team a clear deadline: get "Bleeding Love" to No. 1 on the Hot 100 within two weeks, or get shut out by the original diva.

At the risk of reading too much industry drama into this imagined rivalry, there are some delicious ironies here. Carey, famously broken in the '90s by Mottola's Sony Music machine, is now on rival label Island Def Jam. And Lewis is on a version of Carey's old label—specifically, the now-merged Sony BMG. That merger is doubly ironic: in the '90s, Carey was Sony's answer to the Arista-bred Houston, but now those labels (Arista is part of BMG) are united in breaking Lewis and, one imagines, defeating Carey.

"Bleeding" is iTunes' top seller as we speak, and we can only imagine how well it's selling this week, post-Oprah. Lewis' performance on the next Hot 100 will likely be impressive. But the window to earn her very own "Vision of Love" is closing fast.

Here's a rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• If I seem a little overexcited to talk about the songs at Nos. 8 and 14, it's because the very top of the chart is stuck in quicksand: Nos. 1 through 7 are all the same as last week, starting with three-week No. 1 champ Usher. His digital sales are down about 16%, but his airplay is up by the same amount, so he's still on a roll and keeps his bullet. "Love in This Club" is now the third-most-played song in the country, after Chris Brown's "With You" and Flo Rida's "Low."

• I suspect Maura will be thrilled to hear that the much-loved, oft-delayed Lil Mama has made a comeback, with the biggest leap on the Hot 100 so far this year. It's just too bad she had to go to the same well every other charting R&B act is using to get a hit. "Shawty Get Loose" features support from Chris Brown (him again) and... no shit, T-Pain (him again). Thanks to a solid debut week on iTunes (72,000 downloads), the song shoots 73 spaces to No. 19. Last year, "Lip Gloss" (still her best hit) reached No. 10.

• Speaking of our favorite Lil's: the R&B/Hip-Hop chart continues to be a snooze-fest up top, but the top debut at No. 57 is the latest from Lil Wayne (featuring Static Major), "Lollipop." Amazingly, despite its heavily vocoder-like effects, it does not feature T-Pain.

• Following up our discussion earlier this week on Vampire Weekend post-Saturday Night Live, their hit "A-Punk" is catching on at rock radio, albeit gradually. It's up three notches to No. 30 on Modern Rock Tracks this week. Given how slowly everything on that chart moves, three spots is really not bad. But I wouldn't look for that album to go gold anytime soon.

• For you club-dwellers, Billboard chart columnist Fred Bronson offers an update on veteran Kristine W this week. She possesses one of the strongest hit streaks on any chart in history: all but one of her 12 hits on the Hot Club Play chart since 1994 have gone to No. 1 (the spoiler, 2006's "I'll Be Your Light," peaked at No. 2). She scores the 11th of those club hits this week, as her cover of Diana Ross' "The Boss" rises to No. 1.

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses:

Hot 100
1. Usher Featuring Young Jeezy, "Love In This Club" (LW No. 1, 5 weeks)
2. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 2, 16 weeks)
3. Flo Rida feat. T-Pain, "Low" (LW No. 3, 21 weeks)
4. Sara Bareilles, "Love Song" (LW No. 4, 20 weeks)
5. Rihanna, "Don't Stop the Music" (LW No. 5, 17 weeks)
6. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 6, 11 weeks)
7. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 7, 7 weeks)
8. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 21, 5 weeks)
9. Timbaland feat. OneRepublic, "Apologize" (LW No. 8, 33 weeks)
10. Lupe Fiasco feat. Matthew Santos, "Superstar" (LW No. 10, 14 weeks)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Keyshia Cole, "I Remember" (LW No. 1, 20 weeks)
2. Alicia Keys, "Like You'll Never See Me Again" (LW No. 2, 21 weeks)
3. The-Dream, "Falsetto" (LW No. 3, 15 weeks)
4. J. Holiday, "Suffocate" (LW No. 4, 24 weeks)
5. Mary J. Blige, "Just Fine" (LW No. 5, 25 weeks)
6. Usher Featuring Young Jeezy, "Love In This Club" (LW No. 9, 6 weeks)
7. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 6, 16 weeks)
8. Shawty Lo, "Dey Know" (LW No. 8, 24 weeks)
9. Mario, "Crying Out for Me" (LW No. 7, 29 weeks)
10. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 11, 6 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. Alan Jackson, "Small Town Southern Man" (LW No. 2, 19 weeks)
2. Carrie Underwood, "All-American Girl" (LW No. 1, 16 weeks)
3. Trace Adkins, "You're Gonna Miss This" (LW No. 5, 15 weeks)
4. Rodney Atkins, "Cleaning This Gun (Come on in Boy)" (LW No. 4, 26 weeks)
5. Kenny Chesney with George Strait, "Shiftwork" (LW No. 3, 22 weeks)
6. Chris Cagle, "What Kinda Gone" (LW No. 7, 35 weeks)
7. George Strait, "I Saw God Today" (LW No. 8, 6 weeks)
8. Chuck Wicks, "Stealing Cinderella" (LW No. 6, 30 weeks)
9. James Otto, "Just Got Started Lovin' You" (LW No. 10, 22 weeks)
10. Jason Aldean, "Laughed Until We Cried" (LW No. 9, 32 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Foo Fighters, "Long Road to Ruin" (LW No. 1, 21 weeks)
2. Puddle of Mudd, "Psycho" (LW No. 3, 20 weeks)
3. Linkin Park, "Shadow of the Day" (LW No. 2, 24 weeks)
4. Seether, "Fake It" (LW No. 4, 29 weeks)
5. Paramore, "crushcrushcrush" (LW No. 5, 18 weeks)
6. Foo Fighters, "The Pretender" (LW No. 6, 33 weeks)
7. The Bravery, "Believe" (LW No. 9, 24 weeks)
8. Jack Johnson, "If I Had Eyes" (LW No. 7, 15 weeks)
9. Atreyu, "Falling Down" (LW No. 11, 8 weeks)
10. Rise Against, "The Good Left Undone" (LW No. 8, 38 weeks)

If you're the editors of Parade, a Mariah Carey cover story seems like a slam-dunk. People know who she is, you can use some slightly creepy short-shorts pictures. It's a win/win. Little would you guess that Mariah's presence in the magazine would bring out the nutjobs on your Web site:

(as a disclaimer, all spelling, etc. within in the quote is the author's own)

Part 1 In referrance to the article about Mariah Carey sharing the record for most number one hits on the Billboard Top 100 with Elvis. If Billboard allows this to happen it will take the last bit of respect i and the public has for them. Everyone knows that Carey's former husband (Tommy Mattola) had huge influence with pop radio stations when he was president of Sony music corporation. This resulted in payola (the practice of paying off radio stations to play artists songs) which is supposed to be illegal. Now that she is at Island Def Jam her friend L.A. Reid is doing the same thing. A couple of years ago Sony along with other record labels were caught and fined for payola. This proves that when Carey was with the label she benefited from the actions of her label. Now Island Def Jam must be investigated. The government should go after these people just like they're going after athletes for steroid use. It is cheating, plain and simple and Miss Carey should be exposed for the fraud she and her record labels are perpetrating. Back in the 1990s she was sued in court three times for plagiarism (sampling other people's music without their permission) which she settled out of court for an undisclosed sums. This also proves she is dishonest and she most likely knew about her record labels practice of paying radio stations to play her music.

I guess there's an interesting point somewhere in there, although assuming that Mariah "likely knew" about anything seems like a false premise.

Part two is where the agenda comes in:

Part 2 If Billboard plans to go through with this farce they should do one of two things. 1. They should recognize the Elvis number ones on the Billboard Single Sales Chart (for the simple fact that you can't fake sales) "A LITTLE LESS CONVERSATION" 2002 , "RUBBERNECKING" 2003, "THAT'S ALRIGHT MAMA" 2004 and "HEARTBREAK HOTEL" 2006. or 2. They should put a disclaimer at the top of their weekly chart listings explaining that the resulting chart placings are a result of dishonest practices between the artists record labels and the radio stations that play their music. Tommy Mattola must be questioned as well as other Sony executives that were there during Carey's tenure. Elvis would've never gotten away with it if his label would've participated in payola. He was investigated along with **** Clark back in the late 1950s payola scandal which rocked the music world ,but he and Clark were found not guilty. If someone were to top Elvis (like the beatles did) without cheating we would have no problem accepting it ,but payola is music's version of the steroid scandal going on in baseball now. We must show our young and old people that taking short cuts to the top is wrong because it is lying and cheating.

He's actually upset that Mariah Carey is currently tied with Elvis for second place on the list of artists with the most No. 1 singles on the Billboard Hot 100. The Beatles are still solidly at the top with 20, but Mariah and Elvis have 17 a piece. Hence, just like the Mitchell Report rocked baseball, the 19 comments left by "Don" will be similarly thought-provoking for anyone who stumbles upon the comments section of a Mariah Carey article from Parade. At very least, we might know what Eliot Spitzer has been up to... cracking down on radio payola even while temporarily unemployed.

Comments: Interview With Mariah Carey [Parade]

A good tribute video should, above all, make you uncomfortable. Something about the subject matter and the song choice—either separately, or in combination—ought to turn your stomach a bit and make you nervous for humanity. It's like how you don't really believe a topical cream is working until it burns—you can't trust a tribute video until it makes you physically cringe. Today we'll go deep into the heart of darkness that is Luby (or Lubby, depending on which fan site you ask) videos. Oh, you're not familiar with Luby? Well, you know ER? You know that hot Croatian doctor named Luka? And the chick from NewsRadio who plays Abby? And how they're a couple on the show? Luka. Abby. Luby. There's nothing creepier than fanfic, except banal prime time doctor drama fanfic set to Bright Eyes... or Mariah Carey.

Song: "First Day of My Life" by Bright Eyes
Concept: Luka and Abby as two teens who met in the bathroom line at Coachella in 2005 and immediately fell in love.
So this is a pretty dialogue-heavy video, which is either a bold artistic choice or just very distracting. The talking at least drowns out Conor Oberst's unbearable treacle some of the time. There's really not all that much going on here; there are a few nice little artistic flourishes with the still shots, but in general it's just a good old fashioned bizarro concept video. As if the Luby factor—which I'm still trying to wrap my head around—weren't uncomfortable enough, the added quavering tenderness of Bright Eyes makes the whole thing practically unbearable. A fictional romance about two doctors in their mid-30s on a prime-time drama shouldn't be anywhere near a Bright Eyes song. If there's one thing for which YouTube will live in infamy, it'll be these cultural trainwrecks.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: I have to admit, I like the strange disappearing stained glass window effect at 1:17. It works well with the sound and tone of the song.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: This is more to do with ER than the video itself, but this bit of dialogue is just beyond the pale:

Abby: You watch me when we make love.
Luka: (Dramatic pause, sigh) You're beautiful.

Song: "Emotions" by Mariah Carey
Concept: Luka and Abby as characters in a particularly bad early-'90s chick flick.
The main problem here is aesthetic incongruity. Mariah Carey's bouncy ode to feelings is bursting with sunshine and different shades of pink, whereas ER is a decidedly gray and dull green affair. It is set in an emergency room, after all. And, strangely, in a lot of the clips Luka and Abby seem pretty pissed off. The whole thing is a bit of a mess, from the dissolve transition overkill to the poorly placed sex scenes. But perhaps the most heinous offense is that it's just plain boring. Once the novelty of watching ER fanfic set to Mariah Carey has worn off, you're left only with the mind-numbing reality of Windows Media Maker and its many limitations. This one delivers that initial feeling of uneasy dread essential for all truly worthy tribute videos, but lacks the character and execution to be a true classic.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: Nothing in particular stands out.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment : The placement of the sex scenes really creeps me out. It's a very weird, subtle thing, but I hate that they're synced up with Mariah Carey's mutant screeching. It's like some sort of distressing mind torture: "Here, listen to Mariah Carey's unbearably high-pitched squeal while you watch two characters from a show you don't care about have sweaty, softcore sex." YouTube ought to be held accountable for these sorts of cultural atrocities.

Verdict: Both contenders this week exemplify the creepiness inherent in all good tributes, though both are also unfortunately pretty tepid. Advantage goes to the Bright Eyes video for its creative use of still images. Now get me away from Luby, stat.

I'm an uncontrollable radio-flipper when I'm stuck in a car, and this weekend, during the approximately 30 hours that I spent being shuttled around Long Island's highways, the radio was playing an unrelenting mix of "No One," that Chris Brown/T-Pain song, "Apologize," and, for some reason, the entire Samantha Fox catalog. Not that the last selection wasn't a joy, but when you hear "Kiss Kiss" for the 5,875th time, you begin to want—nay, crave—the slightly different offerings served up by the all-Christmas stations on the dial. Anyway, it was somewhere between exits 58 and 59 on the LIE that I realized that I really, really liked one new holiday standard in particular: Mariah Carey's 1994 "All I Want For Christmas Is You," which, while full of longing, is not one of those "drinking myself to death at Christmas" songs that are so popular on these stations' playlists. (Seriously, WTF with that Dan Fogelberg track about people drinking beer in a car? Talk about giving people a reason to spike their egg nog with rubbing alcohol.) While I was looking for Mariah's "Christmas" video—which seems to have been filmed in and around the malls of my youth—I found the My Chemical Romance cover above, thus proving my suspicion that there was at least one emo band out there who'd realize that this track's mix of incessant boppiness and sad-sack lyrics was a perfect fit for its aesthetic.

All I Want For Christmas Is You - My Chemical Romance [YouTube]

Mariah Carey, Untitled
Old date: Dec. 4.
New date: February 2008.
Official reason: None given, although Roger Friedman sounds a bit too excited by the phrase "diva logjam." (Madonna and Janet Jackson's forthcoming albums are being released around the same time.)
Real reason: How do you top "We Belong Together"? Here's hoping that whatever Mariah and Jermaine Dupri come up with, it doesn't involve her using the "Genius Of Love" sample for the 8,485th time.

Mario, Go
Old date: Oct. 30.
New date: Nov. 27.
Official reason: Dude's label is really trying hard to set a record for longest pre-release-date delay.
Real reason: Re-re-re-retooling thanks to it leaking a week ago. Here's hoping one of Mario's "people" has T-Pain's number!

Ashlee Simpson, Untitled
Old date: November 2007.
New date: Q1 of 2008.
Rumored reason: She's scared of ... Blake Lewis? Seriously? Wasn't his album pushed back from November anyway? Does anyone fact-check anything anymore?
Real reason: She just figured ou