Audio: "Landslide" cover by the Smashing Pumpkins
What better song for this movie than "Landslide"? It's sad, introspective, and distinctly western-sounding—the perfect soundtrack for images of wide, desolate plains, vast skies, and tragic lovers. And the editing in this video is nicely attuned to the tempo and overall tone—slow-motion longing glances, wistful dissolves. And the part where he hugs the shirt during the lyric "I've been afraid of changing because I built my life around you"! It's pure, evil genius! But wait a second... Billy Corgan's voice... is drilling holes into my eyeballs! Whhyyyy couldn't this have used the original version of the song? I absolutely cannot watch this without cringing every time Corgan's scratchy, nasally growl hits a high note. It's unbearable, and completely voids any value this video might have. It came so close to being a masterpiece of the genre.

Another video in this girl's repertoire falls much squarely on the fail side of the brilliance/idiocy line. I almost didn't even want to write about it, so ghastly were its effects on my senses, but in the end I decided it was too absurd and possibly offensive to not mention, just for anthropology's sake. Behold:

Audio: "Blue (Da Ba Dee)" by Eiffel 65
Aside from the fact that combining Eurotrash dance music with Ang Lee's beautiful, stark images of the American West is a complete sacrilege, the whole execution of this video is in poor taste. The horrible text frames ("Oh, the drama!" "I'm in need of a guy!" "...Yikes!"), the awful techno editing, the implied conclusion that after a lifetime of repression and self-loathing Ennis is "blue"... it's extremely sophomoric. Honestly, I'm the last person to pull the culturally sensitive card, and usually the first person to make fun of serious things, but this video is really pretty crass. And isn't Eiffel 65 supposed to be contained to torture facilities and designated areas of Belgium at this point? How did they escape back into the general public again?

Audio: "Do You Believe in Love" by Huey Lewis and the News
Visual: Clips from Night Court

While so many tribute videos shine by virtue of their incongruities, this one succeeds because the audio/visual combination makes absolute sense. What better accompaniment to a goofy '80s sitcom than the master of goofy '80s pop hits? Maybe goofy isn't the word I'm looking for.

I think this tribute video demonstrates an important principle: sometimes a particular media item can only be described and defined in terms of another, very specific piece of media. In this case, for instance, we see that the tone, pace, and general atmosphere of Night Court cannot be expressed in words, but rather only through the equally dated music of Huey Lewis and the News. That's why you feel so complete when you watch this video; a noun and its unique modifier are united in a single multimedia experience that brings together Harry Anderson and a red-hot sax solo. What more could you possibly want?

Night Court - Do You Believe In Love? [YouTube]

Robin Hood is without a doubt one of Disney's finest productions. Between the chill minstrel rooster and the bad-ass soundtrack, it comes damn near perfection, but it's often forgotten among the showier films in Disney's catalog. If ever there were a place for such an overlooked gem to shine, it would be the tribute video community. Yes, our old friends have done things with this movie so fantastic—and fantastically bizarre—that after about seven months away, I'm resurrecting Objects of Affection just for a pair of particularly strange Robin Hood videos. These clips prove two very important points: 1, "Bitter Sweet Symphony" can and will be used to make any sequence of visuals melancholy and/or poignant; and 2, Bryan Adams isn't just for live-action versions of Robin Hood anymore.

Song: "Bitter Sweet Symphony" by The Verve
Concept: Robin Hood as love story between two medieval heroin addicts.
This is definitely one of the artsier tributes I've come across. The obligatory sepia segment—from :45 to 2:00—is deliberate and refined, and the editing is swift and smart. I would say the clips are well chosen, but whether or not you think a shot of a baby cartoon turtle wearing big round glasses meshes well with "Bitter Sweet Symphony" is just too subjective for that kind of statement.
Overall, though, it makes for a highly enjoyable viewing experience. The Disney/British alt-rock pairing may be a bit distractingly incongruous, but it's a deftly produced and aesthetically pleasing clip. Plus, if you think about it long enough you might start to see a connection between the two elements. After all, what was Robin Hood doing if not "trying to make ends meet, trying to make some money?"
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The capture-of-Robin Hood sequence, starting at about 4:40, nicely captures the sadder tones of the song, especially the closeup of Maid Marian shedding a single tear.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: At 5:25, when Maid Marian is dancing with the handicapped hound dog. It's just extra absurd for some reason.

Song: "(Everything I Do) I Do It for You" by Bryan Adams
Concept: Robin Hood as tender tale of two foxes in their mid-40s looking to give love a second chance.
Considering the nature of the song, this video spends way too much time on clips from the movie that have nothing to do with the Robin/Maid Marian romance. For instance, the minute-long sequence of the hen lady-in-waiting sword fighting with the baby rabbit is just way off in context. That and the random acts of sepia make for a disorienting and rather boring video, though the novelty of the combination carries enough weight to compel the viewer to watch at least once all the way through just by sheer force of curiosity. Originally written for the 1991 Kevin Costner vehicle Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, the logic—if you can call it that—behind pairing this song with this movie exists in theory, but that doesn't make it any less bizarre.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The last two and a half minutes—during the schmaltzy jam session at the end of the song—feature the romantic moonlit walk sequence of the movie, and it's about the only portion of the video that makes any sort of sense (insofar as this kind of thing can make sense).
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Starting at 1:58 there's a slow motion sepia clip of Maid Marian frolicking with her matronly lady-in-waiting and it appears for a moment as if they're the subject of the song.

Verdict : No contest, really. While the Bryan Adams clip is respectably strange, the "Bitter Sweet Symphony" video is weird and entertaining, making the winner of this special edition of Objects of Affection and the most morally upstanding bandit in all of Sherwood Forest.

"Kate's Tribute to Rad Stuff"

I couldn't pick just one subject, so I culled some of the best images floating around my various Internet depositories and decided that the common thread was that all the pictures were rad. The song has nothing to do with any of the images, but is also very rad, and thus the perfect soundtrack.

The Good: Little to no serious effort involved on my part aside from a few Google image searches and grouping the pictures into one album on Photobucket (and deciding what was rad enough, of course). It's not a half-bad looking video, either. I especially enjoy the part where the poster for Almodóvar's ¿Qué he hecho yo para merecer esto!! and the picture of the Oklahoma noodling champion with giant catfish are side-by-side. It really captures the spirit of tribute video incongruity quite well.

The Bad: You can produce as many 30-second clips as you want for free, but Animoto has the gall to charge you $3 for a full-length video. I hate to admit this, but I went ahead and paid the charge (for the sake of making my rad tribute as rad as possible), and it's still not technically full-length, clocking in at just 1:14. Last time I checked, "Save It For Later" was 3:36. This is nothing short of a gyp and a travesty, and I hope Animoto realizes that they will never be truly popular until they provide free full-length videos, as is befitting the web 2.0 way of life. What decade do they think they're operating in anyway?

All in all, despite its flaws, it's not a bad idea for a service. At the very least it should spice up countless high school graduation assemblies that have been plagued by PowerPoint for over 10 years now. Its artistic merit, however, is far more dubious. I for one certainly hope that this program, or ones like it, do not begin to replace actual editing by the tribute video community, which is perpetually teetering on the edge of artistic bankruptcy. It's just that it's so often the extremely good or extremely bad editing that truly defines a tribute video, and if people are tempted by the almost absurd simplicity of these programs we may soon see the decline of a community that may be the Incas of the Internet world.

The one last thing that bothers me about Animoto—and I shudder to even bring this up—is that it could be an early signpost for the ultimate demise of truly creative and artistically valid music videos. The form is already so beleaguered by its banishment from television that it's vulnerable to such programs, which make montage editing a non-skill. Why bother dropping money on a professionally produced video when you can just take some pictures of a band and shake-and-bake them with the single until golden brown and ready for YouTube upload?

Obviously, that's somewhat of an exaggeration. But only somewhat.

This one definitely makes the best use of the preexisting footage, adding animation to most of the images and screwing around with the colors. The iridescent sheep standing amid a swarm of fireflies provide a particularly striking image.

Someone's an art student! Luckily stop-motion couldn't be a more perfect fit for Sigur Ròs' jerky, yet peculiarly fluid sound. I think this one might be my favorite. Not only is the stop-motion well done and very appropriate for for the song, a few of the Heima clips in there have been put through the experimental cycle on an editing program and come out all backwards and color-confused. It's out-there without being pretentious, much like Sigur Ròs (though I assume some would beg to differ on that one).

This video, like the worst of Sigur Ròs, is just plain boring. The concept appears to be that the footage is some sort of old photograph, as it's drenched in sepia tones and framed to look like a very old photo. It just comes off looking like a page of the most oblique scrapbook in the world. But on the plus side, at the very end the horses run backwards just like in Enigma's "Return to Innocence" video.

The rest of the videos, which are up on YouTube's front page, tread along similar lines: lots of Icelandic landscapes altered with experimental editing and varying levels of pretentiousness. But despite the clips' (somewhat inevitable) artsy earnestness, it's comforting to know that YouTube will cater to a slightly higher-brow sensibility every once in a while; with any luck the site will make this 24-hour-takeover concept a regular feature. My only complaint is that this guy didn't submit.

YouTube [Official site]

Audio: "Texas Has a Whorehouse in It," performed by Dom DeLuise from the movie version of the musical The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.
Visual : Scenes from Cowboy Bebop.

Where to start? At the very least there does seem to be some sort of hooker storyline in Cowboy Bebop, and it does have the word "cowboy" in the title, but other than that it's anyone's guess as to how this marvel of modern culture came to be, or why it's so lovingly edited. It's fast-paced and punchy, and there's even some impressive lip-sync action! But the cultural discrepancy between Dom DeLuise's show-stopping number and the cryptic, violence-drenched world of anime is so gaping that viewing the video in its entirety creates a feeling of profound uneasiness that no amount of clever editing can surmount.

What's next? Sweeney Todd and Veggie Tales? My Fair Lady and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? This video has desensitized me to any and all future combinations.

Videos consisting solely of live performance and publicity clips are on thin ice to begin with, as they basically have only editing to save them from total banality. And unfortunately, it seems that nobody at KC Express HQ read the Windows Media Maker help guide. There are a few meek dissolves toward the beginning of the video, but other than that the clip is an uninspired series of nondescript clips (Kelly posing for a photo shoot, doing a touchdown dance, etc.), most of which are inexplicably in black and white. Not even the classic tribute video sepia treatment! It's disheartening, to say the least.

All that being said, this is not by any means an assault on the Kelly Clarkson Express, who obviously have their hearts in the right place, but simply lack the resources to edit together a decent video. The real culprit in this tragedy is Clive Davis and his refusal to promote a song with as much potential as "How I Feel." While My December may not have been the hit machine that Davis was hoping for, he could have, at the very least, given this song a try on the radio. It's not stop-you-dead-in-your-tracks pop gold like "Since U Been Gone"—so few things are, really—but it's a better-than-decent song, and it's got something that so many other songs of its ilk lack: lyrics.

Obviously, most pop songs have articulations that form words, but "How I Feel" is like a good old-fashioned song where the singer actually says something of personal importance to him or her. I like that grating Colbie Caillat song as much as the next sucker, but the lyrics—despite their ostensibly very personal nature—are still high-sheen and empty. Not that Kelly Clarkson is all of a sudden Joni Mitchell these days, but there's certainly a heftier element to "How I Feel," and that comes in part from its less conventional, more specific lyrics. It's a solid pop song with just the slightest hint of integrity, and it's a real shame that its marketing has been left to enthusiastic but ultimately powerless fan clubs.

Maybe the solution here is a call to the tribute-video community, who tend to be unfailingly strange, yet occasionally successful in their music video adventures. After all, look what they did for "Breakaway."

Despite its evident intentional humor and self-awareness, this video still manages to fall in with the all-time classic tributes. There's just something about it that's wonderfully unironic. Formally speaking, it's kind of a wreck: The scenes are haphazard and too-long, and the overuse of the diagonal wipe transition screams first-timer. But this person has tapped into something, and the song really works with the images. Think about it. All anyone in a period drama is ever thinking about is the precise moment at which the corset will be torn asunder, even if we never actually see it happen. If these characters could have, they probably would have owned a copy of Let's Get It On for those special evenings when, after having tried to hold back the feeling for so long, and the proper courtesies having been extended, and the social protocol for sexual relations having been thoroughly exercised, they could get it on like sensitive people with so much to give.

let's get it on - period drama style [YouTube]

The very left-hand side of the picture is cut off, but other than that this is of sufficient quality. The sound is good, and the camera is steady. There are a few faint and cryptic reflections in the screen—the one to the left of the picture that looks kind of like a robot face is particularly distracting—but it's a small price to pay for such clear and audible footage of Stump emoting sans hat.
Would I buy it for $5 in the subway? Yes, but I'd try to bargain it down to $3.

While this one's got the framing down better, it fails in almost every other way. The buzzing high-frequency sound overpowers the dialogue, and the picture quality is grainy and high-contrast. What's a Law & Order bootleg if we can't see Jeremy Sisto's beautiful face?! Then again, this person did go to the trouble of adding a text intro and fancy transitions with Windows Media Maker. This either somewhat redeems the video or puts the final nail in its coffin, depending on your perspective.
Would I buy it for $5 in the subway? No.

Shaky camera, off-kilter framing, and too short. But the picture quality is excellent. Is it better to see Patrick Stump's sideburns clearly for thirty-eight seconds, or view them at a lower resolution for two-and-a-half minutes? Tough call!
Would I buy it for $5 in the subway? No, but only because it's too short.

This one's really got that authentic bootleg feel: the volume being adjusted, the annoying light reflection in the middle of the screen, the tinny sound quality. It's just a tad too bunko for comfort. Plus, it doesn't include the courtroom scene.
Would I buy it for $5 in the subway? Absolutely not.

Best for last! Not only is this one poorly framed, and completely inaudible, there's actually a running commentary from the videographer, complete with weird sneeze-like sound at the very beginning. She takes issue with the detectives picking on Patrick Stump, telling them to "Shut up! Don't say that to him!" She also can't contain her general Stump love, exclaiming, "Oh my God, he's adorable." The crazed whispery voice is downright creepy, and for all practical purposes this video is useless.
Would I buy it for $5 in the subway? You couldn't pay me to take a copy.

So now you have a representative sampling of your Law & Order bootleg options. I hope it's helpful, though if you cared enough about seeing Patrick Stump without a hat, you probably would have just watched the episode on TV last night. You're probably just a stupid prep who doesn't really care about Fall Out Boy anyway.

Here's the video (embedding unfortunately disabled).

If you're any kind of pop fan worth your weight in gold records, you're aware that Alicia Keys' "No One" was a gleaming gem on the somewhat bleak Top 40 radio landscape this year, and if you're a film fan you've hopefully already seen Sweeney Todd. The two are both vaguely about love and longing, and comparable in their heft of quality, though not exactly aesthetically similar, which is why their union is so oddly compelling.

The fact that this video is actually watchable is a testament to how inherently pleasing the combination really is, because the editing is minimalist at best. Towards the end there's a tepid attempt at a quick-cut sequence and a hilarious sepia moment, but for the most part it's just clips of Helena Bonham Carter silently pining after Sweeney Todd. But this works because it's easy to imagine the endearingly delusional Mrs. Lovett character listening to "No One" and daydreaming about love. The video is so spot-on in sentiment that I kind of wish the concept could somehow be incorporated into the movie, maybe to replace one of Sondheim's bloated and melodically deficient numbers. In any case, it's weird, but somehow totally appropriate, which is essentially the ultimate summary of all great tribute videos.

Here's how I think this video came to be: Amy Winehouse was supposed to show up for a day of shooting, but she couldn't be bothered to drag her hair out of bed, so the shoot was rescheduled for the following Wednesday. Though she had assured her manager that she'd definitely make it to that shoot, she suddenly had the urge to claw at her husband's neck and could not be disturbed long enough to make the video. Under pressure from the label to hand in a product, Winehouse's manager had no choice but to assemble the video himself. The result? A series of banal Amy Winehouse images dissolved into one another and—rookie tribute video mistake No. 1!—way, way too much slow motion. This video is basically the equivalent of eating ice cream for dinner in your pajamas; the Winehouse camp has now officially given up.

If you're curious as to how this song might look in other, not-so-official tribute videos, here's an example (embedding disabled, sorry) from the wide world of Lost fandom. Just about as boring, but with 100% more sepia!

A good tribute video should, above all, make you uncomfortable. Something about the subject matter and the song choice—either separately, or in combination—ought to turn your stomach a bit and make you nervous for humanity. It's like how you don't really believe a topical cream is working until it burns—you can't trust a tribute video until it makes you physically cringe. Today we'll go deep into the heart of darkness that is Luby (or Lubby, depending on which fan site you ask) videos. Oh, you're not familiar with Luby? Well, you know ER? You know that hot Croatian doctor named Luka? And the chick from NewsRadio who plays Abby? And how they're a couple on the show? Luka. Abby. Luby. There's nothing creepier than fanfic, except banal prime time doctor drama fanfic set to Bright Eyes... or Mariah Carey.

Song: "First Day of My Life" by Bright Eyes
Concept: Luka and Abby as two teens who met in the bathroom line at Coachella in 2005 and immediately fell in love.
So this is a pretty dialogue-heavy video, which is either a bold artistic choice or just very distracting. The talking at least drowns out Conor Oberst's unbearable treacle some of the time. There's really not all that much going on here; there are a few nice little artistic flourishes with the still shots, but in general it's just a good old fashioned bizarro concept video. As if the Luby factor—which I'm still trying to wrap my head around—weren't uncomfortable enough, the added quavering tenderness of Bright Eyes makes the whole thing practically unbearable. A fictional romance about two doctors in their mid-30s on a prime-time drama shouldn't be anywhere near a Bright Eyes song. If there's one thing for which YouTube will live in infamy, it'll be these cultural trainwrecks.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: I have to admit, I like the strange disappearing stained glass window effect at 1:17. It works well with the sound and tone of the song.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: This is more to do with ER than the video itself, but this bit of dialogue is just beyond the pale:

Abby: You watch me when we make love.
Luka: (Dramatic pause, sigh) You're beautiful.

Song: "Emotions" by Mariah Carey
Concept: Luka and Abby as characters in a particularly bad early-'90s chick flick.
The main problem here is aesthetic incongruity. Mariah Carey's bouncy ode to feelings is bursting with sunshine and different shades of pink, whereas ER is a decidedly gray and dull green affair. It is set in an emergency room, after all. And, strangely, in a lot of the clips Luka and Abby seem pretty pissed off. The whole thing is a bit of a mess, from the dissolve transition overkill to the poorly placed sex scenes. But perhaps the most heinous offense is that it's just plain boring. Once the novelty of watching ER fanfic set to Mariah Carey has worn off, you're left only with the mind-numbing reality of Windows Media Maker and its many limitations. This one delivers that initial feeling of uneasy dread essential for all truly worthy tribute videos, but lacks the character and execution to be a true classic.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: Nothing in particular stands out.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment : The placement of the sex scenes really creeps me out. It's a very weird, subtle thing, but I hate that they're synced up with Mariah Carey's mutant screeching. It's like some sort of distressing mind torture: "Here, listen to Mariah Carey's unbearably high-pitched squeal while you watch two characters from a show you don't care about have sweaty, softcore sex." YouTube ought to be held accountable for these sorts of cultural atrocities.

Verdict: Both contenders this week exemplify the creepiness inherent in all good tributes, though both are also unfortunately pretty tepid. Advantage goes to the Bright Eyes video for its creative use of still images. Now get me away from Luby, stat.

For all my apocalyptic talk, I must say that this might be one of my favorite tribute videos of all time. It's aesthetically competent and thematically ingenious. After all, what's creepier than exploiting, romanticizing, and entirely fictionalizing the tragic love life of a widely- dmired author to profit off the romance-starved pseudo-literary adolescents (and adolescent-minded adults) of the world? But all that aside, really absorb this video. It raises some interesting questions: How did we get to this point in our culture? Does this mean Christ is coming again? Was Jane Austen a creep? (Probably.)

From a purely audio/visual perspective, it's kind of brilliant. This person has found the perfect visual accompaniment for "Creep." Look closely: There's a lot of sad gray in the color palette, and the intermittent shaky, Alfonso Cuarón-esque camera work is dead on for the quavery vocals and guitars. This is especially prominent in the culminating carriage scene at the end of the video, which might be the single greatest image/music match-up I've ever seen.

Perhaps the most interesting thing about this video, though, is how it captures the spirit of Jane Austen herself, rather than the overwrought, blatantly fictionalized movie adaptation of her life to which it is paying tribute. Because you know Jane Austen would have been a Radiohead fan. Side note: How much do you think she would have paid for In Rainbows?

Think of all the old English novels you've ever been forced to read. Is Wuthering Heights your favorite? Then you've got more in common with the tribute-video community than you probably thought! Congratulations? Sorry? In any case, there is no want for love of the Brontë sisters on YouTube, and it appears as if the Heights camp of videomakers is a lot more literature-centric than the vapid movie and miniseries-obsessed Jane Austen fans, who've been spoiled by entertaining, fun-to-watch adaptations. Every Wuthering Heights movie I've seen has been as dank and plodding as the novel itself, but this week's videos prove that even boring BBC fare can sparkle with a little hard work and some help from Pat Benatar.

Song: "We Belong" by Pat Benatar.
Concept : Wuthering Heights as rousing, triumphant story of two lovers who belong to the light, who belong to the thunder, who belong to the sound of the words they've both fallen under.
This is for those who like passionate love stories, but hate it when they don't end happily. Pat's stirring, percussive declaration of eternal love is a bit too optimistic to for Emily Brontë's totally bummer story of abuse, revenge, and doomed passion. Scenes of Catherine's death and Heathcliff's tyrannical return are conspicuously absent. There is one one really out of place scene of Heathcliff slapping the mess out of Catherine, but overall the video is decidedly roll-in-the-hay-centric. A whole lot more could have been done here editing-wise in conjunction with the song's heavy percussion, which is practically begging for some sharp on-beat cuts, but there is at least a somewhat unique use of superimposition that saves the video from total banality. By and large, despite its many flaws, it's a lot more entertaining than the movie itself, and there's certainly something to be said for that.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: At 1:32 separate slow motion images of Heathcliff and Catherine climbing around the misty moors are superimposed over each other during the dramatic chorus of the song, by far the most effective moment of the video.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: The relatively innocuous shot of Catherine and Heathcliff embracing in a field about 56 seconds in seems really odd. I think it's Timothy Dalton's bizarre haircut and weird pensive expression in combination with the chorus of the song; something is seriously off with that sound/image combination.

Song: "Where Is My Love?" by Cat Power
Concept: Wuthering Heights as plotless, slow-motion love story on horseback.
Rarely have I seen a tribute video so accurately capture the essence of its subject. While watching this I found myself slightly bored, vaguely intrigued, and, above all, hoping it would end soon. If that's not the experience of reading Wuthering Heights, I don't know what is. The sparse sadness of the song works perfectly for the gray, brooding images and excessive use of slow motion, and, on a more literal level, the lyrcs "Horses galloping bring him to me," and "Horses running free, carrying you and me" ensure that every single shot featuring a horse has been included in this video. The end result is a conceptually interesting (Cat Power? Really?), though essentially boring piece of fandom that seems like it should be sitting in a corner of the MoMA basement as some sort of rejected video art installment.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The last 43 seconds are just a still shot of Heathcliff (I think) peering out over the moors watching two figures move towards each other in the distance. In slow motion, of course. It's an odd visual, and paired with the music it's almost artful, or at least strangely soothing.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Every clip of someone riding a horse. Serious overkill.

Verdict: While the Cat Power video earns credit for its thoughtful, tone-appropriate approach, the Pat Benatar clip is vastly more entertaining, and, on some levels, even a little bit weirder, making it the most bitter resident of Wuthering Heights, and the winner of this week's match-up.

Bonus:

Showtime's Dexter is kind of like the anti-Lost. The cast is fairly modest, there are usually no more than about two and a half plot lines running at one time, and the entire reality of the story universe is rarely, if ever, brought into question. The writing is refined and relatively restrained, though not afraid to veer off into high drama when necessary. So I'm unsure of whether it should be surprising or entirely expected that it's so wildly popular on YouTube. Lost is, of course, the reigning heavyweight champion of tributes, but Dexter's showing is not shabby in the least, especially for a show on a second-tier premium channel about a morally ambiguous serial killer played by Michael C. Hall—who is, I admit way hotter than he was on Six Feet Under, though still not exactly a Matthew Fox-league heartthrob. It's damn peculiar, but as we should all know by now, the YouTube tribute community is a vast, gaping chasm of infinite, indecipherable perplexities, the least of which being these light-hearted Dexter videos set to monumentally innocuous pop rock.

Spoiler alert: Lots of spoiler clips, just in case anyone is currently watching the series on DVD or is planning to watch it in the future.

Song: "Move Along" by The All-American Rejects
Concept: Dexter as inspirational emo hero. Who kills people.
This one starts off strong with a really nice grasp on the sound/image relationship, but quickly devolves into the poorly edited clip reel it was destined to be. This video, like the vast majority of tributes on YouTube, largely fails to surrender itself to the song. There's way too little thought about how the clips fit rhythmically and content-wise with the music, and it's always a real shame to witness. The razzle-dazzle usually comes from the fact that you're watching clips from something like Dexter—what with the duct tape, and the throat slitting—set to music from bands like The All-American Rejects—what with the silly teen melodrama aesthetic. And that's all fine and good, but eventually either the combinations will have to get even weirder, or people will actually have to figure out a way to put something decent together using Windows Media Maker.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The first forty-five seconds. The surreal slow-motion sequence from last season's finale, ripply underwater images, and credit clips work remarkably well with the hooky opening guitar/bass riff and drum-heavy first verse of the song. If only the rest of the video was as compelling.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: "Silly" this week means inappropriate, and that would be 2:38, at which point a close-up of a person being bled dry from the throat is set to the lyric "Even when your hope is gone/Move along, move along just to make it through." I don't know if the apparent lack of conscious irony makes it better or worse.

Song: "Bittersweet Symphony" by The Verve
Concept: Dexter as made-for-music-video TV show.
There were many, many Dexter tributes to choose from, but I picked this one for two reasons: 1) It is the exact opposite of "Move Along" video, and 2) I find "Bittersweet Symphony" oddly similar to "Iris" in its unyielding ubiquity. But this video is probably the closest thing to an actual music video I've seen in all my months of writing this feature. While most tributes suffer from lackadaisical editing, this one is almost too eager in its pacing and rhythm, making it a little frenetic, but fun to watch, at least. The song is, again, irritatingly worn out, and yet entirely appropriate for Dexter, a very, yes, bittersweet character. Furthermore, the clips and images are sharp and visually congruous with the tone of the song. Come to think of it, perhaps too many things have gone right in this video to qualify it for Objects of Affection. Next week I'll return to the 100% train wreck 100% of the time format.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: It's all pretty good, but I especially like everything between :40 and 1:04. Lots of clips with interesting camera work, and even a little bit of slow-mo.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: None.

Verdict: With superior editing and a strong music video sensibility, the "Bittersweet Symphony" video slices through the competition to win this week's match-up.

Bonus: A generous tipster sent several videos to me last week, one of which—a Fern Gully tribute, of all things—caught my attention with its use of Loreena McKennitt's "The Mummer's Dance."

You should absolutely watch this as soon as possible, if only so that you can say you ventured into the weirdest corner of YouTube and came out alive.

This in turn inspired me to search for McKennitt's rendition of "The Highwayman"—a favorite around the Richardson household years ago. YouTube of course did not disappoint:

Gerard Butler. Juliette Binoche. Slide show.

I sent this video to my mom, and this is what she said: "I found it appealing in kind of a pathetic low tech way (a slide show???)."

Upon my assertion last week that Homeward Bound is the best live-action animal-themed kids' movie, Maura turned to YouTube in search of tributes to her favorite film of this genre, The Adventures of Milo and Otis. She found nothing less than a treasure trove of truly inspired, stoner-approved masterpieces. But before we get started, I feel compelled to mention that some believe the filmmaker to be guilty of animal cruelty, and judging from the clips in some of these videos, it seems unfortunately likely. But this is a feature about aesthetics, not ethics or morality, so we'll set that aside for now. Plus, one time my middle-aged house cat, who'd never once expressed an interest in the outdoors, ran out into the back yard and climbed all the way to the top of a huge pine tree. He was really freaked out and wouldn't come down for a couple of hours, and I always took this as a sign that domesticated animals yearn for adventure at least sometimes. Not that they should be thrown from cliffs and made to fight bears, but still... perhaps it wasn't all bad. At the very least, the sacrifices of these animals benefited humanity by looking awesome when synced up with freaky Icelandic music.

Song: "Runaway Train" by Soul Asylum
Concept: Milo as missing child.
For whatever reason, this movie seems to have inspired mostly post-rock/experimental death metal aficionados, but, lo and behold, a single fan of Caucasian-dreadlocked rockers is holding it down for the verse-chorus-verse side. And it's not bad, really. The song is sort of cutely appropriate for this tale of friendship in times of trial, and despite the vague unnaturalness of pairing a maudlin early-'90s track with a timeless children's movie, the road-weary, faintly sentimental tone of the video is just about right. The staid editing could definitely be a lot more engaging, but I guess "Runaway Train" isn't exactly the kind of toe-tapper that inspires quick cuts and fancy transition effects.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The epic slo-mo sequence starting at 2:53. Milo and Otis running in a field during the dramatic "Like a mad man laughin' at the rain" verse.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: This is subtly silly, and also kind of distressing, but the sequence where Milo floats down a river in a box and Otis bravely attempts to fight a black bear (starting at about 1:12) is synced up with the lyrics "Can you help me remember how to smile/Make it somehow all seem worthwhile/How on earth did I get so jaded?/Life's mystery seems so faded/I can go where no one else can go/I know what no one else knows/Here I am just drownin' in the rain/With a ticket for a runaway train." So much in these lyrics seems weirdly applicable to Milo and Otis' situation: Milo needs Otis to help him remember how to smile because he's been in a box rapidly approaching a waterfall while being harassed by a bear for so long, and he's not even sure it's worth his while. He got so jaded because of shit like this in-a-box-on-the-river scenario, not to mention the seagull attack. As for Otis, he can go where no other pug can go: into a river to save a cat. And he definitely knows what no other pug knows: how to throw a right hook at an enormous bear. Finally, he's got this ticket to the runaway train that is Milo. Makes perfect sense.

Song: "Hoppípolla" by Sigur Rós
Concept: Milo and Otis as extraterrestrial facsimiles of a cat and a dog sent to this planet for the express purpose of visually interpreting Sigur Rós.
This is part two in a four-part series that tells the story of Milo and Otis through the music of Sigur Rós, much to the delight of high people everywhere. Part one is actually my favorite, but this one is a bit shorter and less abstract, and therefore easier to write about. It seems as if most of the clips are presented directly as it appears in the movie, instead of being edited together like a clip reel, which would usually indicate a lack of ambition and creativity; in this case, it simply goes to show that whoever made this has a keen sense of what kinds of visuals work best with Sigur Rós. This isn't even the most compelling video in the series, and it's still more riveting than almost anything else on YouTube. The inherent profundity of nature photography seems to be the inadvertent theme, so it's no surprise that the basic scenery works for this song, but the animal drama is also key. Milo's rapid approach to the waterfall is punctuated perfectly by the building drum beat, and Otis' feeble attempts to fight off the bear are made even more heartbreaking by the soaring chorus of violins. The whole thing is almost suspiciously perfect.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: At 3:17, a long shot of Otis running through the woods to save Milo. Epic!
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: None.

Verdict: In almost any other match-up the Soul Asylum video might be a strong candidate, but this week's tour de force Sigur Rós series definitely takes the prize, and should be shown at midnight movie screenings across the world starting immediately.

Honorable mention: Here's another strong effort in the more experimental vein of Milo and Otis tributes, set to Opeth's "To Bid You Farewell":

Announcements: Don't forget, I'm still accepting entries for the "Kiss Me" video contest! You know you're just dying to edit together some clips from Quantum Leap—or something equally bizarre!—to that song. Also, my friend and favorite music video director, Adena Rice, and I have started a blog about movie trailers. It's similar to this feature, but with fewer scary YouTube people.

The tribute-video well seems to have run dry this week (send tips! please!), but I've got a few miscellaneous oddities haunting my bookmarks, so I figured I'd go unorthodox and set two videos about completely different subjects against each other. The result is something of a Frankenstein's monster of fandom, modern gothic literature, dogs, cats, and Russian lipstick lesbians. Next week I hope to return to single-subject coherence, but for now the sheer novelty of this combination will have to do.

Song: "All About Us" by t.A.T.u.
Concept: Interview with the Vampire as gothic adaptation of Finding t.A.T.u..
What better song for vaguely creepy man-child Vampire love than an industrial pop tune from Russia's most famous, yet vaguely creepy, fake lesbian duo? Unlike many featured tribute videos, this one kind of makes sense: melodramatic pop goth movie paired with tone-appropriate song. But I'm starting to think that anything involving the disturbingly infectious music of t.A.T.u. is going to seem sort of odd, or even unseemly, simply by virtue of their general weirdness. In any case, the editing is mercifully quick-paced, and the dark cobblestone alleys and candlelit coffin rooms look like the sets for a t.A.T.u. time-travel movie in which the girls pose seductively at different locations all across 19th-century Europe. Basically the look of the movie—overwrought costume design, bad hair, and all—matches the feel of a t.A.T.u. song, making the video a coherent, if somewhat bizarre, experience.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: There isn't really a standout moment in this one. The opening sequence of cuts between Brad Pitt dramatically walking down a street and Kirsten Dunst twirling set to the song's percussive intro is pretty dramatic, though.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Again, nothing particularly stands out since it's sort of a disappointingly tasteful video. Pitt's ugly Fabio hair is pretty silly, though.

Song: "Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne
Concept: Homeward Bound as transition from pop-punk image to Kelly Clarkson phase.
Homeward Bound: best live-action animal-centric kids movie ever. "Keep Holding On": Avril's most painfully generic, yet inexplicably epic single. A good combination? Maybe. In theory this video should be pretty shameful—especially for someone like me, who has seen Homeward Bound upwards of two hundred times (because I was six when it came out, not because I'm a big Sally Field fan). Avril's offensive foray into string-heavy ballads probably shouldn't be used in association with anything, especially not a beloved children's movie, but for some reason it really works here. Maybe it's the bland "never give up" message of the movie that makes it so apropos for Avril's equally banal perseverance ballad, or maybe it's just that putting the song in context of animal friendship/teamwork makes it ten times more appealing than it actually is. Whatever the reason, this video is admirably—and unexpectedly—effective.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: Full disclosure: I'm almost annoyingly fond of cats and dogs, so most of this video seemed awesome to me. To name a few: Shadow jumps in the river to rescue Sassy as Avril sings "So far away, I wish you were here. Before it's too late, this could all disappear" at 1:05; Shadow, Chance, and Sassy reunite by running towards each other in a large valley during the swelling chorus of the song; Shadow's tragic accident during the solemn bridge of the song, and subsequent triumph during the chorus, starting at 2:36.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment : None. 100% heart-warming 100% of the time.

Verdict Both of these wayward tributes are worthy competitors, but the Homeward Bound video more triumphantly employs its bland pop song, making it the winner of this week's unusual match-up.

Bonus: This Edward Scissorhands/Tupac tribute cannot go without mention:

And don't forget the contest I announced last week!

Of the current big-name English actress Dames, Helen Mirren is by far the most likely to knock back a few cocktails and say something amusingly inappropriate at a party. She's presumably friends with Dames Maggie and Judi, but she prefers to hang out with an edgier, less establishment crowd on a regular basis, and she probably thinks that anti-smoking campaigns are stupid. In short, Helen Mirren is the cool Dame. And yet she's still a classy middle-aged British woman, seemingly impervious to the trappings of modern youth culture. But as usual, the tribute-video community knows nothing of perceived social boundaries.

Song: "You Know I'm No Good" by Amy Winehouse
Concept: Helen Mirren as sultry and vaguely nefarious seductress.
If there's one thing that Amy Winehouse's hooky, gimmicky music is good for, it's establishing a mood. This video, thanks in equal parts to the song and the well-chosen sex bomb clips, is successfully sensual (well, as sensual as a tribute video can be) while retaining the essential dorky earnestness necessary for all truly amusing fan videos. Of course, it doesn't hurt that Mirren has played many no-good women, so there's plenty of material from which to cultivate Winehouse-level dirtiness. The editing is uninspired, but not distractingly bad, which makes it great by tribute video standards, and the final product is a solid piece of benevolently creepy fan art. To sum up, I'll quote the video's creator: "Enjoy the naughty dame! God knows I do!!"
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: 2:39; Mirren as Marat in David's La Mort de Marat as Amy Winehouse sings "I'm in the tub, you on the seat/Lick your lips as I soak my feet." That intersection of culture is truly mind-blowing.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Occasionally this category switch-hits as "Most disturbing music-to-image sync-up moment." In this case, that would be 1:16, at which point Cuba Gooding Jr. sensually thrusts his torso as Mirren bops her way down onto her knees to unbutton his pants. I'm all for cougar sex, but the Dame reminds me just a little too much of my own mom for this to be an acceptable image.

Song: "I Am the Body Beautiful" by Salt-N-Pepa
Concept: Mirren as "the house (a whole mansion) of elegance."
Yes. A million times yes. This is perhaps the most underrated Salt-N-Pepa song, and I'm glad it was put to such a bizarre use; Mirren has played enough in-charge ladies to provide ample footage for its themes. I'm especially amused by the use of clips from HBO's Elizabeth I (which is superior to the Cate Blanchett movies, especially the dreadful one out now); perhaps not Mirren's most overtly sexual role, but there's something to be said for reading Elizabeth I as a Salt-N-Pepa-style modern queen. In addition to these thematic strong points, the editing of still shots in a sequence during "Get with the b-e-a-u-t-y, beauty" is particularly entertaining, if a little shoddily executed.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The short dance sequence at 2:06; Mirren's moves and ornate garb are perfect for the song.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Again with the disturbing Cuba Gooding Jr. sex scene. But also 1:16, where Salt-N-Pepa sing "I'm sensual/I am body beautiful" during a clip where Queen Elizabeth, decked out in battle-ready armor, rallies the English troops. Not exactly her most sensual moment.

Verdict: Both videos share an almost uncomfortable, yet inoffensive tone of general luridness, and both are essentially pretty entertaining, so it's hard to pick. I'll give the advantage to the Salt-N-Pepa video if only for its attempt at creative editing.

Special announcement: While stumbling upon the many Helen Mirren videos on YouTube this week, I came across this fun-to-watch Helen tribute set to Sixpence None the Richer's "Kiss Me."

This reminded me of how much I loved the X-Files tribute set to that song from a few months back. Maybe it's just because I'm a really pathetic sucker for "Kiss Me," but I truly think that it is the ultimate song for tribute-video background music. And with that in mind, I am now officially accepting your homemade music videos set to "Kiss Me." As in a contest, yes. I realize that you people lead busy lives, but if you can find a little time in your schedule for a modicum of silliness, I would be thrilled. The requirements are pretty wide open: take as much time as you want, put it together however you please (still images from Google, clips from movies, etc.), and once I've accumulated enough videos (assuming I accumulate any at all), I'll declare a winner. The prize is yet to be determined. It may or may not be a tacky e-card.

Send all submissions to kate AT idolator dot com. (Standard contest rules apply.)

To be fair, "Until the Day is Done" really isn't terrible enough to inspire voluntary extinction, but it is boring. It kind of sounds like Anderson Cooper called up Michael Stipe and said, "Hey, I'm going to put on a tight T-shirt and hit the rain forest with Jeff and Sanjay. Could you have an innocuous background song for our documentary trailer ready by the end of the week?" And Michael Stipe was like, "Sure thing. I can have it to you right now, actually. Just last night I wrote and recorded three boring, completely nondescript songs while I was asleep." But the song's listless melody and droning vocals somehow work for this particular subject matter. That grating sadness in Stipe's voice is the perfect tone for environmental catastrophes. It's saying "This is baaaadd. And I'm moooooping. Why don't you dooo sooomething abooout it? I'm going to whine until the daaay is dooone." I found myself irritated into awareness.

Technically the video is nothing special; anyone with a little editing software experience could have put it together. But content-wise it is both very sad and vaguely homoerotic. Maybe this is just me, but Jeff Corwin is incredibly appealing. He knows everything about animals, cares about the environment, and has a cool snake tat. Plus he's eccentric enough to put out some ambiguous gay vibes, which only fuels the Corwin/Cooper slashfic scenario. Throw in hot, youngish doctor Sanjay Gupta and it's a veritable consortium of strapping men who care about the environment and want to help. It's like the set-up for a very earnest, socially conscious gay porn. Not that I would be into that kind of thing. Anyway, the clips themselves, though rather unceremoniously spliced together, are powerful and well-chosen. Here's the breakdown:

Very sad
-Cancer water
-Clear cut rainforest
-The body of water formerly known as Lake Chad
-Elephant with injured foot
-Melted ice caps

Very awesome
-Jeff holding a baby polar bear
-Jeff and Anderson handling a python (too easy!)
-The sloth poignantly extending his arm, one of the only visuals that achieves a truly successful moment in conjunction with the song

But overall the video is pretty mediocre, due largely to the blah song. R.E.M. usually sounds pretty sleepy to me, but I was expecting a little more gusto than this. It's admirable to contribute something to environmental awareness, but just because you're trying to save the sloths doesn't mean you have to sing like one.

Homicidal preteen mob mentality might not inspire you, but that doesn't mean others can't enjoy it enough to synthesize images of it with music and crappy editing software. Maybe that's a cliché, but I run this feature on principles, dammit . Anyway, apparently there's a surprisingly large contingent of Lord of the Flies fanatics on YouTube, and I think they've been underrepresented for far too long. This week's videos boldly celebrate man's descent into savagery with second-rate prog rock and the rarely-seen intersection of Boy George and William Golding.

Song: "Heat of the Moment" by Asia
Concept: Lord of the Flies as teenage ambitions remembered well.
You know what's weird? Back when I was in eighth grade reading Lord of the Flies for English class we had to make a video project, too. Except we actually had to go down to the creek and act out some scenes ourselves—none of this hiding behind Windows Media Maker and cheesy soft rock. Anyway, despite the general C-minus effort, this video does have a certain charm. It only uses still images, which is usually a major disadvantage, but in this case the strange tempo of the song and cadence of the verses are perfect for dramatic closeups skillfully edited together with zig-zag wipes and slow fade-outs. Plus, this song really couldn't be attached to something too slick; it wouldn't seem right.
Conceptually, though, this video is a little confused. While it claims to be "In Memory of the Most Supersonic Character, Simon," when paired with the song it comes off as a justification of his murder ("It was the heat of the moment!"). But aside from this ambiguous intent—and perhaps the hilariously over-simplified summary text—there is little to truly complain about here. The images are well-chosen, it's reasonably well-edited, and the dialogue inserted at 1:43 is appropriately proggy. (Thanks to Bailey Triggs for the link.)
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: This is kind of obvious, but I genuinely like the artsy still of the boys dancing during the lyric "Do you remember when we used to dance?" at :32.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: There's a shot of Simon pensively sniffing a flower as Asia sings, "And now you find yourself in '82/The disco hotspots hold no charm for you," as if to imply that Simon is an aging party girl rather than a young boy stranded on an island with his murderous peers. There's also an extremely silly alternating close-up sequence between Simon and the decapitated pig's head at 2:17.

Song: "Karma Chameleon" by Culture Club
Concept: Lord of the Flies as the story of a boy, his lizard, and their red, gold, and green dreams.
There's something vaguely inappropriate about this video (probably due to the lyric "You're my lover, not my rival"), but I'm choosing to ignore those (hopefully unintentional!) undertones in the interest of keeping it light. This is really more like a truly dreadful experimental film than anything else. The repeated use of the chameleon scene is crushingly literal and way too frequent. There's also a general lack of narrative focus that makes it pretty hard to sit through, and don't get me started on the editing (shots are way too long, no sense of tempo or rhythm, etc.). I do appreciate the attempt at matching the color-rich images with the color motif of the song, but in the end it's just not enough to make up for the draggy pace and repetition.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: At 2:46, the song builds up to the chorus and there's a shot of a tree with some birds in it. Right as the chorus hits the birds scatter and and the shot cuts, almost on beat, to the chameleon scene. It's the only semi-successful moment.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Even though it's entirely inappropriate to say this about 12-year-old boys, and even though I said I wouldn't bring it up, the implied love between Ralph and Jack from 1:14 to 1:28 is pretty funny, if only because it's a consequence of "Karma Chameleon."

Verdict: Despite its unimpressive production and general simplicity, the Asia video is by far more charming and even slightly more compelling, making it the winner of this week's match-up and chief steward of the rotting pig head.

Honorable mention: This My Chemical Romance/LOTF video. Shabbily edited, but definitely worth a mention.

In a July article about Jane Austen's enduring cultural popularity, the Times actually skimmed the surface of the deep, dark well of Pride and Prejudice tribute videos:

But the best and most timely are music videos that reflect the primal, Adam-and-Eve attraction that Austen so discreetly cloaked. A clever montage of Austen movie heroines is set to Nelly Furtado's "Maneater," and clips of Regency-era men set to Justin Timberlake's "SexyBack."

These kids and their hard-ons for Regency-era men! Aren't the young people today just a scream and a half?

But that was really just a testing of the waters, something kind of genteel to ease them into Monday's exploration of "Crank That"/Disney mash-up videos. The article's main focus is, wisely, the business end of the issue, namely: why do entities like Disney and Nickelodeon tolerate this desecration of their personified animals and cleaning implements?

Nickelodeon, part of Viacom, sees the humorous videos as fair use of its copyrighted content. "Our audiences can creatively mash video from our content as much and as often as they like," said Dan Martinsen, a Nickelodeon spokesman. "By the way," he added, "that was a very nice edit job by whoever did the SpongeBob mash." (That laissez-faire reaction, it should be noted, comes from a company whose corporate parent has a $1 billion piracy lawsuit pending against Google, the owner of YouTube.)

Disney's view is starkly different: any unauthorized use of Disney property is stealing. Still, the company picks its battles carefully. While it closely monitors the Web for infractions, Disney will not discuss how it evaluates potential cases of copyright infringement and declined to comment on the "Crank That" videos.

The fact that the postings have not been removed — YouTube regularly yanks videos that media companies identify as pirated material — highlights the situation mash-ups pose for media companies: are these videos parodies of cultural icons and thus protected under copyright law, or do they trample on intellectual property?

Anthony Falzone, a copyright expert at Stanford, said, "media companies have been fairly tolerant of Internet mash-ups and parodies so far. Wholesale piracy is a much bigger issue, so that is where they are focusing most of their efforts."

Translation: Nickelodeon is, as usual, desperately trying to convey an edgier, down-with-the-kids vibe, while Disney retains its monolithic evil empire silence, allegedly fighting greater evils. But is this a sufficient explanation of Disney's tolerance of these mash-ups? Not for me, which is why I've made my own assumption: Disney secretly gets a kick out of the videos. "Crank That" is obscene, but just innocuous enough to turn a blind eye. Plus, and it pains me to admit this, the videos are generally pretty entertaining. It's like, if your little brother made you watch them you'd probably be like, "Yeah, whatever," but just taken at face value for investigative purposes, they're refreshingly bouncy and fun. Except for maybe the SpongeBob video, which is just inherently grating.

I asked my film school friend Matt Porter to apply his gimlet eye to a few of these videos and give me some of his opinions, as a Final Cut Pro...pro. I've also taken the liberty of noting the means by which each video visually represents the lyric "super soak that ho."

Winnie the Pooh

Matt says: Ok, so, "Soulja Boy" Pooh I approve of. The editing took attention to detail, and while it may not be quite on par with videos like The Electric Six's "Gay Bar" when it comes to syncing mismatched video with audio, it still works, and creates a very enjoyable uncomfortable vibe.
Super soak that ho: A heffalump squirting Roo with water from its trunk.

The Lion King

Matt says: I like the fact that this one chooses to use different clips for "yoooooo" each time it comes up instead of the same series of clips. Again, the lining up of audio and video isn't perfect, but in terms of the general action matching the song, this one might be better than Pooh. This is more like a music video.
Super soak that ho: Simba playfully pulling Nala into the water.

Bambi II

Matt says: Good use of Bambi's facial expressions, even though the lip syncing is pretty far off. Various good character positions; the attitude in their stance matches the mood (of the song). I like the final shot of the two just looking at each other.
Super soak that ho: Bambi stumbling around in a puddle with a turtle on his nose (kind of disappointing).

Matt's verdict: I think Bambi is my favorite, actually. It gets the pace right more than the others. Lion King is good, but lets some moments go too long, and cuts oddly offbeat.

During its nine-year reign of terror, Everybody Loves Raymond was a pox on the bloated corpus of prime time, senselessly propelling Brad Garrett and his insidious antics to national fame while constantly overshadowing more creative, and, you know, funnier shows (such as, ahem, Arrested Development) at the Emmys (seriously, how did Doris Roberts win over the brilliant Jessica Walter so many times? It was rigged!). It was just determined to hang around and sit in network TV's proverbial recliner year after year, eating chips and wiping grease stains on the armrests. Simply put, it was lazy and generally humorless, which makes it perfect fodder for tribute videos. So get out your Jive dictionary and prepare to release your inhibitions/feel the rain on your skin:

Song: "Jive Talkin" by the Bee Gees
Concept: Everybody Loves Raymond as a boring dance at a community rec center that's deejayed by your least-favorite uncle.
What an appropriately bland song choice! In fact, if Everybody Loves Raymond were a song, it would probably be "Jive Talkin'." Both emit an aggressive banality usually reserved for daytime TV commercials, and for this reason it is perhaps dangerous to combine them into one product. And yet, as usual, YouTube has tragically little regard for common courtesy. Where this video really succeeds is in approximating the experience of actually sitting through an episode of ELR. The editing is extremely sub-par, which makes the video kind of listless and boring, and the still shots are just plain lazy. It really is just as much of a failure as the show itself.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: The dance sequence midway through is about the only thing that's actually matched up with the music.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up-moment: At about 1:18 a funeral scene is matched to the swirly keyboard solo. Of all the sitcom antics one could pair with this part of the song...a funeral?

Song: "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield
Concept: Everybody Loves Raymond as The Hills.
I've avoided directly addressing the tribute video creators, but I'm going to go ahead and go there now because both of these videos were made by the same person, and both are horribly edited. So, tvgirlonline, please, please step up your game. This video is even worse than the last. You need to grasp the concept of the quick cut, because your videos are like watching paint dry in slow motion. Seriously! You're obsessed with a terrible TV show, I can deal with that, but, please, don't bring these dreadfully assembled tributes into the universe. Anyway, the vaguely entertaining concept of the "Unwritten"/ELR combo is outweighed by the utter boringness of actually watching the video, and that's about all I can say, really, except maybe that more pop songs should be this tolerable. If Natasha and Kelly C. did a small club tour I'd totally be there.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment : The cut at 3:02 is actually synced up to the big break in the song, making it the most compelling moment of the entire video.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Any time Peter Boyle and Doris Roberts are onscreen, because you can pretend that you're actually watching the opening credits to The Hills and that they've been added as cast members.

Verdict: The winner of this week's match-up is...neither! They both suck, so instead I'm giving the victory to this ELR tribute set to "Semi-Charmed Life."

I want to preface this week's post by saying that I have never seen Battlestar Galactica, and am therefore at a severe disadvantage when it comes to making making jokes and references. If you are a big fan, feel free to write some for me and leave them in the comments. It's this new interactive concept for the lazy and uninformed that I am piloting. Anyway, from what I ascertain, BSG is set in space. It's like Star Trek, but less popular? Something like that. There's a doomed romance and lots of serious intergalactic warfare. Serious enough to bust out the Goo Goo Dolls? You bet! Also, Simon & Garfunkel.

Song: "Iris" by The Goo Goo Dolls
Concept: Battlestar Galactica as City of Angels.
When the world finally implodes on itself, due in large part to the Hannah Montana tour and extinction of polar bears, the only remaining vestiges of life will be a TV and a radio playing a VH1 "Celebreality" program and "Iris," respectively. Seriously, this song will never die. Someone will always find it apropos for something, even if, as in this case, it's space planes. Apparently this is a tribute to "Vipers and Viper pilots." There's nary a love story in sight, which is sort of endearing, really, and makes the concept somewhat novel. But despite this glimmer of hope, it's still a horribly boring song and the Vipers, however bad-ass they might be, are about as equally boring to look at for almost four minutes. I sincerely hope this video isn't indicative of the entire color scheme of BSG. It's like staring into a bag of machine parts.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: None.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: I really can't find one.

Song: "I Am a Rock" by Simon & Garfunkel
Concept: Battlestar Galactica as surreal nightmare.
Now this is a horse of a different color. Seriously, what inspired this epic act of audio/visual incongruity? According to the video description, Commander Adama is "like the 'rock' or foundation that holds the fleet together." Bingo! It's all clear now! Cue the Simon & Garfunkel! Their delicate harmonies and folksy sensibility are perfect for that bloody fight scene. Everything about this video is severely disorienting and vaguely—if not explicitly—disturbing. It's very violence-oriented, which makes the Simon & Garfunkel soundtrack all the more bewildering. But at least it's entertaining in its aggressive insanity.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: One minute in, as Adama beats the living shit out of some guy while Simon & Garfunkel sing "I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain. It's laughter and it's loving I disdain."
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Almost anything, really. I'll go with the shooting scene halfway in.

Verdict: It's no contest: the Simon & Garfunkel video is by far more entertaining, and just about as weird as any tribute video can strive to be, making it the (insert Battlestar Galactica reference here) winner of this week's match-up.

I like to think that, in a way, Objects of Affection pays tribute to the tributes, especially when the videos are about movies. In working with a medium where soundtracks are a given, it must be tempting for tribute-video creators to use a song already associated with the movie, creating a continuity of tone between one's video and the film to which it pays tribute. It's just plain logical. But today's feature is dedicated to the individuals who can see beyond the walls of the soundtrack, who gaze into the horizon of possibility and boldly reject "Circle of Life" in favor of something just a little bit sexier. This week, CGI dinosaurs get in touch with their piano goth side and learn to ska dance.

Song: "Bring Me to Life" by Evanescence
Concept: Jurassic Park as story of one T-Rex's struggle with, and eventual triumph over, clinical depression.
From the first shot to the very last , this video just screams "delightfully misguided." Pretty much the only congruity here is the tone of the song in combination with the dark and stormy setting. One can imagine Amy Lee at a grand piano, bellowing about some kind of heartache or sadness and getting rained on out by the Raptor pen. So in that aspect this video is a total success; the last half hour of Jurassic Park does, in fact, look like an Evanescence video. But the logic stops there. Perhaps the most amusing aspect is that the clip choices and the way they're edited suggest that we should be experiencing this song from T-Rex's point of view. For instance, the slo-mo sequence starting at around 30 seconds is very dramatic and surprisingly emotional—it's as if T-Rex is asking Sam Neill to find his spirit and "lead it back home." Overall it's definitely fun to watch, though almost uncomfortably absurd. (Thanks to commenter RickSlick for the link.)
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: Something about the those Raptor claws creeping along to the tinkling piano is just so perfect. That moment is both amusingly ridiculous and (probably unintentionally) masterful. There's a sort of dual foreboding in motion; the twitchy movement of the claws indicates that we should brace ourselves for the impending Raptor attack, while at the same time the morose piano warns us: Evanescence song! Straight ahead! That's a lot of panic packed into five seconds.
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: Take your pick, really. I'll go with the decision to sync up the dramatic ending of the song with the lawyer-gets-eaten-while-on-the-toilet scene. Classy!

Song: "Sell Out" by Reel Big Fish
Concept: Jurassic Park as fast-paced romp through a rockin' party at T-Rex's mom's house.
Raise your hand if you were totally into Reel Big Fish in like ninth grade. Woo! Ska phase! In the spirit of the genre at hand, I will try to keep this short and exhaustingly snappy. Everything about this video rules! Conceptually it's a fucking masterpiece, and the execution is flawed, but determined, much like every single high school ska band to ever play a marching band's casino night. And that's really all I have to say. This one pretty much speaks for itself.
Best music-to-image sync-up moment: Music ends, Sam Neill says, "We probably won't get off this island alive."
Silliest music-to-image sync-up moment: At 2:10, when Sam Neill and Téa Leoni realize they're probably about to get eaten by Raptors as that maniacally upbeat horn riff blares in the background.

Verdict: Both contenders this week really go above and beyond in all categories of tribute video inexplicableness, so I won't exactly declare a winner, but I will say that if they were both dinosaurs in Jurassic Park, the Evanescence video would be a Raptor, while the Reel Big Fish clip would be T-Rex.