It's been a week of bad timing for Rolling Stone: First, their new cover pin-up gets busted for drugs and gun possession just as the new issue goes to press, making the story instantly out-of-date; and today, their website has a story about how the members of Eagles Of Death Metal are all awesomely excited to be opening for Guns N' Roses—and we all know how that went.

We're a bit perplexed as to why they'd put such a stale story online without an update; it's not as if they don't know how to sneakily change things on their website. And frankly, we're worried about the staleness of the next issue, which a RS spy has sent our way. Among its cover headlines:

BRITNEY'S VAGINA: HAS ANYONE SEEN IT? DOES IT LOOK KIND OF LIKE A BELUGA WHALE?
ROBERT ALTMAN: EVERYTHING'S JUST DANDY WITH THIS GUY!
RISQUE RUSSKIE VLADIMIR PUTIN: DEFINITELY NOT HAVING PEOPLE KILLED WITH RADIATION

Smoking Section [RollingStone.com]