It's a risky move, because the Billboard Hot 100 is dominated by songs that scale the chart by amassing sales as well as airplay. But the song is so mindlessly catchy, the act's people figure it'll be a big chart hit anyway with radio alone.

I could be talking about M.C. Hammer's 1990 smash "U Can't Touch This," the "Superfreak"-sampling hit that made the Top 10, even as Capitol refused to issue it as a cassingle.

But I could also be talking about Kid Rock's "All Summer Long," a mashup of Warren Zevon's "Werewolves of London" and Lynyrd Skynrd's "Sweet Home Alabama" that debuts on the Hot 100 this week at No. 80 despite his lack of interest in releasing it digitally.

Can the erstwhile Robert Richie pull off in 2008 what one Stanley Kirk Burrell pulled 18 years ago?

A No. 80 debut might not seem all that impressive for the Kid's insanely catchy song, but it's appearing on the chart with one hand tied behind its back thanks to the lack of any digital single release. Just for comparison, in early May, Weezer's "Pork and Beans" debuted at No. 84, even with iTunes on its side—as well as radio, where the song has been massive, topping the all-airplay Modern Rock list for 10 weeks. (On the Hot 100, "Pork" never went much higher after its debut; it peaked at No. 64 a few weeks back.)

Right now, 99 songs on the Hot 100 are available at retail in some form, virtually all at iTunes. But "All Summer Long" is the only one with the Billboard footnote "PROMO ONLY," which is basically code for "radio can play this, but the consumer can't buy it." Atlantic has even provided a single-length "radio edit" of the song to programmers, but you can't buy that, either.

Kid's isn't the only song this year to make a splash without digital sales. You may recall that in February, Mariah Carey's album-leading single "Touch My Body" appeared on the chart on radio points alone, debuting way up at No. 57. That would seem to minimize Mr. Rock's achievement. But let's get some perspective: (a) Mariah is a massive pop artist who crosses multiple radio genres and treats the Hot 100 as her personal fiefdom; and (b) everyone knew ahead of time that the song would get a digital release eventually—which it did in April, shooting the song to No. 1 on the big chart.

Kid Rock is a different rock n' roll animal. He scores radio hits only every half-decade or so: massively in 1999, with a string of rock hits off his breakthrough Devil Without a Cause; briefly in 2003, with a country-pop crossover track, "Picture." And more important, he doesn't want to release any of his material—albums or singles—on iTunes. So, for radio program directors to play one of his songs, they've got to get great listener feedback; they're never going to have the kind of sales data that tells them when a song's connecting with the public.

So far, it looks like "Summer" isn't having trouble winning PDs' support. It's already more than halfway up the Hot 100 Airplay list and rising fast (No. 45 this week, up from No. 60). And it's got multiple radio formats providing it with a chart boost: Top 40, adult contemporary, mainstream and modern rock, and country stations are all playing it. Assuming it never goes on sale at iTunes or Amazon MP3, this Kid Rock single, more than Carey's "Touch," might prove to be a pure experiment in the reach, and limits, of an all-airplay single with huge listener appeal.

Kind of like "U Can't Touch This."

Beyond the gleeful pillaging of Rick James on Hammer's hit, and Zevon and the Van Zandt brothers on Kid Rock's, "U Can't Touch This" and "All Summer Long" would seem to have little in common. But for those of us who've watched the history of the retail single for the last 20 years, "U" is a pivotal record.

Tapped as the second single from 1990's Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em after the modest R&B hit "Help the Children," "U" was only issued as a 12" vinyl single, a clever tactical move. That allowed "U" to qualify for the Hot 100 (until 1998, all singles had to be released at retail in some form to be eligible for the big chart) but guaranteed that the overwhelming majority of consumers desiring the song would have to buy Hammer's album on cassette or CD. For all intents and purposes, "U" was a grand experiment on Capitol's part, a de facto airplay-only hit on a chart where every other record had a mainstream retail component—cassingle or maxi-cassette, CD-single—providing chart points. And they didn't do it with a low-priority song, either; they did it with a preordained rap-pop crossover smash with huge MTV play.

Long story short: the experiment worked like a charm. "U" made the Top 10 anyway, thanks to its blanketing of the Top 40 airwaves in the summer of 1990. If a cassingle had been released, the song indubitably would have gone to No. 1 and stayed there for months... but what did Capitol care? They made money hand over fist: Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em spent a staggering 21 weeks atop the Billboard album chart and went 10-times-platinum, the first hip-hop album of any kind to see that kind of success. Since 1990, no other album has spent that long on top of the chart (Billy Ray Cyrus, Whitney Houston, and Alanis Morissette have come closest).

In short, "U Can't Touch This" was the song that kicked off the record industry's decade-long campaign to bury the single as a retail medium. (Don't get me started—I could go into a long diatribe about all the other experiments, from deleting singles early to limited releases, the labels used to get out of releasing retail songs over the next 10 years.) By the start of the 2000s, virtually no song on the Hot 100 had a retail component. Billboard caved in '98 in allowing non-retail tracks to chart, and the first all-airplay song to top the chart was Aaliyah's "Try Again" in 2000.

Since the early 2000s, of course, the paradigm has shifted again, thanks to the inclusion of digital song sales on the Hot 100 starting in 2005. Consumer sales once again have a major impact on the chart. In fact, sales skew the Hot 100 more radically now than at any time in the chart's history. The tide has turned against radio: it's now virtually impossible to make the Top 10 without sales—as proved this spring by Carey's hit, which couldn't get higher than No. 15 on airplay alone before iTunes propelled it to the top.

I doubt that quite as much thinking has gone into Atlantic's withholding of "All Summer Long" from iTunes as went into keeping Hammer's hit off mall-shop shelves in 1990. (Mostly, it seems the Kid has a beef with his label's digital-release royalties, or Steve Jobs, or something.) Still, the effect has been the same: this week, Rock's nine-month-old Rock N Roll Jesus disc is back in the Top 10 for the first time since last fall.

Good for Kid Rock and Atlantic—but I think we can agree that this year's anti-single experiment will not prove a Hammer-sized success, even if Jesus does return to No. 1 on the album chart for a week or two, and even if "Summer" does manage to make the Hot 100's upper reaches. If the Kid, as he claims, doesn't care about people illegally downloading or torrenting his music, there's got to be a slew of people too cheap to buy a full-price CD and too savvy to do without his hit on their iPods.

Here's a rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• It's been eight weeks since Rihanna's "Take a Bow" topped the Hot 100, and it looks like she might claw her way back. The song, which never left the Top Five, moves up two spaces to No. 2 this week, right behind Katy Perry's three-week champ "I Kissed a Girl." In the modern, sales-skewed Hot 100, the chart pattern we've seen by "Bow" is becoming more typical: an explosion in sales, followed by a radio catch-up.

The iTunes release of the song sent Ri hurtling more than 50 spots to No. 1 in May; since then, her sales have cooled, but the song has risen in the airplay rankings to become the second most-played track in the country behind Lil Wayne's "Lollipop." (R&B programmers, in particular, have only recently caught on; "Bow" reaches the Top 10 for the first time this week on the airplay-centric Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs list.) Perry continues to have the top-selling digital song, but if Ri can keep her sales respectable—it's ranked seventh on the digital chart this week—and keep growing her airplay, we could see a coup.

If Ri were to pull off the repeat appearance in the penthouse, the nine-week gap between No. 1 stints would likely go down as the second-largest in Hot 100 history. It's unlikely that any song will ever top the all-time record-holder: Chubby Checker's "The Twist," which went to No. 1 in 1960 and then again, 16 months later, in 1962. (Reportedly, the kids got into the dance first, and then their parents caught on later.)

• I didn't realize this until Fred Bronson told me, but the new song on top of the Hot Country chart this week is actually a remake of a modern-schlock smash. "Home," originally written and recorded by the millennium's New Sinatra, Michael Buble, topped the Adult Contemporary chart in the summer of 2005. Covered by Blake Shelton for a fan-soaking rerelease of his 2007 album Pure BS (man, I'll say!), "Home" is now a Country chart-topper, as well.

Can't wait for the inevitable R&B revamp by Robin Thicke, or maybe Eric Benet... with special guest T.I., of course.

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses (Digital Songs chart includes total downloads/percentage change in parentheses):

Hot 100
1. Katy Perry, "I Kissed a Girl" (LW No. 1, 9 weeks)
2. Rihanna, "Take a Bow" (LW No. 4, 13 weeks)
3. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 2, 17 weeks)
4. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 3, 21 weeks)
5. Coldplay, "Viva la Vida" (LW No. 6, 9 weeks)
6. Chris Brown, "Forever" (LW No. 8, 11 weeks)
7. Natasha Bedingfield, "Pocketful of Sunshine" (LW No. 10, 21 weeks)
8. Jonas Brothers, "Burnin' Up" (LW No. 5, 2 weeks)
9. Plies feat. Ne-Yo, "Bust It Baby (Part 2)" (LW No. 7, 15 weeks)
10. Miley Cyrus, "7 Things" (LW No. 16, 5 weeks)

Hot Digital Songs
1. Katy Perry, "I Kissed a Girl" (LW No. 1)
2. Jonas Brothers, "Burnin' Up" (LW No. 2)
3. Miley Cyrus, "7 Things" (LW No. 6)
4. Coldplay, "Viva la Vida" (LW No. 4)
5. The Pussycat Dolls, "When I Grow Up" (LW No. 7)
6. Rihanna, "Disturbia" (LW No. 5)
7. Rihanna, "Take a Bow" (LW No. 10)
8. Metro Station, "Shake It" (LW No. 9)
9. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 8)
10. Chris Brown, "Forever" (LW No. 14)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Keyshia Cole, "Heaven Sent" (LW No. 1, 15 weeks)
2. Lil Wayne, "A Milli" (LW No. 2, 11 weeks)
3. The-Dream, "I Luv Your Girl" (LW No. 4, 19 weeks)
4. Plies feat. Ne-Yo, "Bust It Baby (Part 2)" (LW No. 3, 19 weeks)
5. Alicia Keys, "Teenage Love Affair" (LW No. 6, 21 weeks)
6. Chris Brown, "Take You Down" (LW No. 5, 15 weeks)
7. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 7, 17 weeks)
8. Rihanna, "Take a Bow" (LW No. 11, 11 weeks)
9. Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West, "Put On" (LW No. 10, 9 weeks)
10. Usher feat. Beyonce and Lil Wayne, "Love in This Club, Part II" (LW No. 8, 11 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. Blake Shelton, "Home" (LW No. 2, 24 weeks)
2. Alan Jackson, "Good Time" (LW No. 4, 13 weeks)
3. Montgomery Gentry, "Back When I Knew It All" (LW No. 1, 20 weeks)
4. Kenny Chesney, "Better as a Memory" (LW No. 3, 16 weeks)
5. Brooks & Dunn, "Put a Girl in It" (LW No. 6, 11 weeks)
6. Dierks Bentley, "Trying to Stop Your Leaving" (LW No. 5, 26 weeks)
7. Sugarland, "All I Want to Do" (LW No. 8, 7 weeks)
8. Keith Anderson, "I Still Miss You" (LW No. 10, 23 weeks)
9. Keith Urban, "You Look Good in My Shirt" (LW No. 12, 7 weeks)
10. Taylor Swift, "Should've Said No" (LW No. 13, 8 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Weezer, "Pork & Beans" (LW No. 1, 12 weeks)
2. The Offspring, "Hammerhead" (LW No. 2, 9 weeks)
3. Foo Fighters, "Let It Die" (LW No. 3, 14 weeks)
4. Linkin Park, "Given Up" (LW No. 4, 18 weeks)
5. Seether, "Rise Above This" (LW No. 5, 20 weeks)
6. Coldplay, "Viva la Vida" (LW No. 8, 5 weeks)
7. Disturbed, "Inside the Fire" (LW No. 7, 15 weeks)
8. Death Cab for Cutie, "I Will Possess Your Heart" (LW No. 6, 16 weeks)
9. Saving Abel, " Addicted" (LW No. 11, 16 weeks)
10. 3 Doors Down, "It's Not My Time" (LW No. 12, 20 weeks)

How to become a star, the Rihanna way!

1. Introduce yourself to the world by teaming with MySpace and Secret for a tour of malls. It's all about the children.

2. Do you have something novel in your past? If you're from Barbados, like Rihanna, try turning it into a shtick by doing ads promoting tourism for the country. It makes them look glamorous and gets you on the TV!

3. You don't want to become a novelty artist, though, so it'd probably a good idea to generalize yourself as an R & B star as soon as possible. Nike can help!

4. You've made some jams, so the next step would be the broaden your fan base and get more glamorous. You're not some kid in sneakers anymore—you're a Cover Girl.

5. Throw in deals with Nokia, Totes (they sell umbrellas, don't they?), JCPenney, Fuze and whoever else feels right at the correct points in your career. But remember, it's not about the money.

"We said no to so many deals," says Marc Jordan, one of her managers. "Either the fit wasn't right — it was more about a check than extending Rihanna's brand — or there was a disconnect between the brand and Rihanna."

See, it's all about the music. Sorry, extending your brand.

Nothing Sells Like Celebrity [NYT]
Rihanna's Video Diary! [YouTube]
Rihanna Barbados Commercial [YouTube]
SOS - Rihanna (Nike) [YouTube]
Rihanna - Cover Girl [YouTube]

In 1988, I was a high-school junior and dweeby pop fan (only half of that has changed) madly in love with Pet Shop Boys' cover of the Brenda Lee/Elvis Presley chestnut "Always on My Mind," which was flying up Billboard's Hot 100. The single was a happy accident for EMI, the result of the Boys agreeing to perform on a U.K. telly special commemorating the 10th anniversary of the King's death. PSB's sophomore album Actually had been out for months and already spun off two massive transatlantic hits, "It's a Sin" and "What Have I Done to Deserve This?"; "Always on My Mind" appeared too late to make the album.

Lucky me, I hadn't purchased the Actually CD yet, and that spring EMI gave me a great deal: they re-released the CD with the "Always" single bundled with it. In either a touching sign of fidelity to album integrity or total laziness, they didn't re-press Actually; instead they bundled an "Always" CD-single into the other side of the longbox. I pitied the fools who'd bought Actually in the first six months it was on shelves.

Exactly 20 years later, this haphazard approach to garnering hit singles late in an album's life cycle has become a viable strategy for an industry desperate to win the pop fan's dollar by any means necessary. And this week, it produces an eye-popping chart move by Rihanna, whose "Take a Bow" takes over the Hot 100's top slot.

First, let's talk about Ri-Ri's achievement. "Take a Bow"—which I like to think of as either a musical version of Eddie Murphy's Raw routine about men cheating, or a cleaner version of "Smell Yo Dick"—hurtles from No. 53 to No. 1. (It's also the second song to top the Hot 100 with that title, including Madonna's 1994 snoozy-ballad smash.)

This 52-place move is the second-largest leap to No. 1 ever, after Maroon 5's 63-space jump with "Makes Me Wonder" last May, and it's thanks entirely to "Bow's" release on iTunes last week. In its first week on Apple's virtual shelf, the song sells a phenomenal 267,000 buck-a-song downloads: one of the three biggest totals ever for a digital single in its debut week, after Mariah Carey's "Touch My Body" just six weeks ago (286,000 copies) and her own "Umbrella" last May (277,000 copies).

Depending on how big a stickler you are, "Take a Bow" is either the fifth Top 20 hit from Rihanna's year-old Good Girl Gone Bad album or a standalone hit in its own right. Island Def Jam would rather you think of it the former way, because they plan to rerelease the album in June as Good Girl Gone Bad: Reloaded with "Bow" tacked onto it.

As we've discussed here at Idolator many, many times before, this trend toward "special edition" re-releases of year-old albums is an insult to the hardcore fan and a shameless grab for more revenue on already-established hit albums. But it's really just a more overt manifestation of something the industry's been wrestling with the entire Rock Era: how best to profit from a hit single.

In the '60s, when singles were actually moneymakers in their own right and albums were an afterthought, the labels treated albums far more shabbily than they do today, reshuffling song lineups without artists' permission based on whatever was on the radio that month. After all, what is the U.S. album Meet the Beatles! but a revised version of the U.K. With the Beatles album with "I Want to Hold Your Hand" and "I Saw Her Standing There" tacked onto it? Often, Motown would even retitle an album after a hit when it emerged late in the album's life. Originally released as In the Groove, Marvin Gaye's 1968 LP was reissued as I Heard It Through the Grapevine!, complete with new cover art and superfluous exclamation point, once that immortal song became a smash; the track listing was the same, however.

Indeed, one of the most critically acclaimed albums of the '60s is now known largely in its hit-fortified reissued edition. The Zombies' Odessey and Oracle was first released in the spring of 1968, flopped, then re-released a year later with the hit single "Time of the Season" tacked onto it—a great but incongruous song appended to what had been a coherent suite of baroque pop tunes. [Redacted, as per comments below. Apologies—my memory and flimsy online research led me astray on this point.]

My Pet Shop Boys example from '88 arguably comes at the end of a two-decade period when the album was dominant and, by and large, untouchable—no label would dream of reissuing a big rock album from the '70s or early '80s with a single stripped onto it. Hell, even pop acts' albums in this period were largely untouched: if Madonna's Like a Virgin had been released in 2004 instead of 1984, Sire surely would have re-released it six months later with the non-album hits "Crazy for You" and "Into the Groove" tacked onto it. When XTC's classic 1987 album Skylarking was reissued with the fluke alternative-radio hit "Dear God" added to it, it was considered extraordinarily rare.

The mid-'80s creation of the compact disc and the growth of the cassette—each with longer running times than the LP—encouraged labels to add bonus tracks to CD and tape, but these were never pushed as singles. (Michael Jackson came closest in 1988, when the CD-only "Leave Me Alone" was promoted to MTV but not the radio.) Throughout the '90s, the labels reissued tons of classic LPs on CD with singles and other ephemera tacked on; but these were not current albums. That only began to change around 2000, starting with the likes of Christina Aguilera, reissued at its height with better radio mixes; and Jennifer Lopez, who fully rerecorded hits like "I'm Real" with rappers and then re-released 2001's J. Lo to include them.

The current "special edition" strategy came of age in 2004, when the already-hot Usher, already three No. 1 singles deep into Confessions, recorded "My Boo" with Alicia Keys and re-released the album with a fourth No. 1 single locked down. Since then, we've seen Mariah Carey, Shakira, Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, and a score of other hit acts reissue their albums with new, chart-bound singles on them.

What's unprecedented about the last half-decade of hits isn't just the addition of hits to still-charting albums but, to put it bluntly, the premeditation. These new hit songs aren't flukes or accidents, they're planned. It's the Hollywood strategy of multiple DVD releases of the same movie ("Special Edition," "Remastered Edition," "Too Hot For TV! Edition," "Double-Gold Elite Edition," "Just Pay For This Again, Please, Edition" etc.), adapted for the music industry.

Before the creation of iTunes, this would have been an especially offensive, fan-soaking way to score a new hit. But now, the labels can claim innocence to the complaining fan, because the hit-bound bonus tracks are available—often even before the re-released album comes out—for 99 cents. When an act is already hot, the digital sales bump for a new song is inevitably massive, sending it flying up the charts. In four of the last five years, one No. 1 single per year was an add-on to an already extant album: the aforementioned "My Boo," Carey's "Don't Forget About Us," Shakira's "Hips Don't Lie" and now "Take a Bow."

It's a neat trick, a way to storm the album chart and the singles charts at the same time: diehard fans have to have the new version of the album, if only for the new cover art; and more casual fans can download the new single inexpensively, producing a digital smash. In an era of ever-declining sales, you can expect the industry to keep "refreshing" hit albums—what few they have left—until the CD itself is a total nonentity.

Oh, and finally: We might see the next special-edition hit before the summer even starts. The same week she tops the chart, Rihanna debuts with Maroon 5 on a new version of their song "If I Never See Your Face Again," from a forthcoming special edition of Maroon 5's last CD. Expect it to shoot into the Top 40 in a week or two.

Here's a rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• Coldplay have the top two debuts on the chart this week, the result of the band's odd strategy of releasing two singles simultaneously through different channels. Both songs materialize within the Top 40.

"Violet Hill," the first single from Coldplay's new album, was first made available to fans as a free download in late April; those downloads were not formally tracked and, hence, had no effect on the Billboard charts. But a week later, the song was put on sale at iTunes, and the second single, "Viva la Vida," was released a day later.

The result: "Viva," which had never been available in any form prior to last week, makes the higher Hot 100 debut, all the way up at No. 15, with sales of more than 100,000 downloads. Meanwhile, "Violet," which the diehards had already scored for free, debuts at No. 40, with more modest sales of about 44,000.

The real shocker: who are the 44,000 people who paid for "Violet Hill" a week after it was offered for free?!

• The R&B/Hip-Hop Top 10 is juicier than usual this week, with three songs entering and a weird rebound by Mariah Carey. Her "Touch My Body" returns to No. 2, knocking back Ashanti's "The Way That I Love You," which seemed poised to hit No. 1. So much for that comeback! A bit lower down, Keyshia Cole replaces herself in the winners' circle, as her massive chart-topper "I Remember" falls out to make way for the followup, "Heaven Sent," up 10 big places to No. 8. She's going to have a hard time playing that wronged-woman card on future hits; Cole has become one of R&B's most reliable hitmakers.

• Alert Maura: New Kids are back on the charts! Well, not the Hot 100, but rather the Pop 100, a Top 40-centric chart Billboard uses to track a narrower slice of the radio audience. The erstwhile NKOTB debut on this less-heralded chart with "Summertime" at No. 81.

As Fred Bronson points out in his weekly Billboard column, the Kids will have to cross over to the actual Hot 100 to break a 14-year dry spell there; they last appeared on the big chart with 1994's (I wish I were kidding about this title) "Dirty Dawg."

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses (Digital Songs chart includes total downloads in parentheses):

Hot 100
1. Rihanna, "Take a Bow" (LW No. 53, 5 weeks)
2. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 1, 13 weeks)
3. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 2, 9 weeks)
4. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 3, 19 weeks)
5. Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club" (LW No. 4, 13 weeks)
6. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 5, 15 weeks)
7. Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake, "4 Minutes" (LW No. 6, 8 weeks)
8. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 7, 13 weeks)
9. Natasha Bedingfield, "Pocketful of Sunshine" (LW No. 8, 13 weeks)
10. Danity Kane, "Damaged" (LW No. 11, 9 weeks)

Hot Digital Songs
1. Rihanna, "Take a Bow" (CHART DEBUT, 267,000 downloads)
2. Leona Lewis, "Bleeding Love" (LW No. 1, 162,000 downloads)
3. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 2, 150,000 downloads)
4. Natasha Bedingfield, "Pocketful of Sunshine" (LW No. 4, 132,000 downloads)
5. Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake, "4 Minutes" (LW No. 3, 118,000 downloads)
6. Coldplay, "Viva La Vida" (CHART DEBUT, 101,000 downloads)
7. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 5, 93,000 downloads)
8. Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club" (LW No. 8, 87,000 downloads)
9. Ray J & Yung Berg, "Sexy Can I" (LW No. 6, 86,000 downloads)
10. Jesse McCartney, "Leavin'" (LW No. 7, 83,000 downloads)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Lil Wayne feat. Static Major, "Lollipop" (LW No. 1, 9 weeks)
2. Mariah Carey, "Touch My Body" (LW No. 4, 14 weeks)
3. Ashanti, "The Way That I Love You" (LW No. 2, 13 weeks)
4. Usher feat. Young Jeezy, "Love in This Club" (LW No. 3, 14 weeks)
5. Jordin Sparks with Chris Brown, "No Air" (LW No. 5, 10 weeks)
6. Plies feat. Ne-Yo, "Bust It Baby (Part 2)" (LW No. 7, 11 weeks)
7. Rick Ross feat. T-Pain, "The Boss" (LW No. 6, 18 weeks)
8. Keyshia Cole, "Heaven Sent" (LW No. 18, 7 weeks)
9. Trey Songz, "Last Time" (LW No. 12, 15 weeks)
10. Chris Brown, "Take You Down" (LW No. 16, 7 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. James Otto, "Just Got Started Lovin' You" (LW No. 1, 30 weeks)
2. Brad Paisley, "I'm Still a Guy" (LW No. 5, 12 weeks)
3. Phil Vassar, "Love Is A Beautiful Thing" (LW No. 6, 28 weeks)
4. Taylor Swift, "Picture to Burn" (LW No. 3, 18 weeks)
5. George Strait, "I Saw God Today" (LW No. 2, 14 weeks)
6. Rascal Flatts, "Every Day" (LW No. 7, 12 weeks)
7. Trace Adkins, "You're Gonna Miss This" (LW No. 4, 23 weeks)
8. Lady Antebellum, "Love Don't Live Here" (LW No. 8, 32 weeks)
9. Kenny Chesney, "Better as a Memory" (LW No. 9, 8 weeks)
10. Carrie Underwood, "Last Name" (LW No. 10, 9 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Weezer, "Pork & Beans" (LW No. 1, 4 weeks)
2. Seether, "Rise Above This" (LW No. 2, 12 weeks)
3. Flobots, "Handlebars" (LW No. 3, 6 weeks)
4. Atreyu, "Falling Down" (LW No. 5, 16 weeks)
5. The Offspring, "Hammerhead" (CHART DEBUT, 1 week)
6. The Raconteurs, "Salute Your Solution" (LW No. 6, 7 weeks)
7. Puddle of Mudd, "Psycho" (LW No. 4, 28 weeks)
8. Linkin Park, "Given Up" (LW No. 7, 10 weeks)
9. Death Cab for Cutie, "I Will Possess Your Heart" (LW No. 8, 8 weeks)
10. Nine Inch Nails, "Discipline" (LW No. 15, 3 weeks)

Rihanna & The Time [DailyMotion]
The Klaxons and Rihanna sing live at The Brits 2008 [YouTube]

• Jimmy Jam is reuniting with The Time for their performance with Rihanna on Sunday night. And the group has apparently mended fences with Prince, for those of you who want to taunt yourself with the possibility of the Purple One returning to the small screen.

• Kanye West is planning on paying tribute to his mom during his just-announced set.

• John Mayer is playing too! Please God I hope he's not going to dress up like Borat.

• There's a company out there that's trying to scam people by selling fake tickets to the Grammys. Wouldn't fake tickets to the Hannah Montana movie have been a more profitable enterprise?

• Sasha Frere-Jones thinks Soulja Boy was robbed when it came to Grammy nominations. Tell it to Mims, dude.

Imagine, for a moment, you're in promotions at Sony/BMG, and you're trying to stoke interest in the 25th-anniversary edition of Michael Jackson's Thriller. This isn't the first time you guys have rereleased the record, and with Michael coming up on his 50th birthday, you've got your work cut out to make him look relevant.

Sure, the obvious move is lining up some current acts to help Jacko remix those classic tracks—like bringing in Akon to rethink "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'." While you're at it, try convincing the Grammy people to let Michael perform on the show (what the hell, they need ratings and hey, you can't guarantee that Michael won't have a Britney-in-Vegas-style meltdown...). But then you think:

You know what would really seal it? If we could get a current act...somebody really hot...to sample something from Thriller and have a big, fat hit with it. Like, Justin biting "Billie Jean"...or Jigga rapping over "Thriller"...or something. I mean, Kanye sampling "P.Y.T." was helpful, but that record peaked months ago. We need something hot right now, just as we're dropping the disc...

And then, like a table-dancing angel from above, Rihanna answers your prayers.

Right at the start of February, and less than two weeks before the heavy sell for Thriller '08 begins, Rihanna's "Don't Stop the Music"—"Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'" sample and all—elbows into the Top Five on Billboard's Hot 100. And in the same week, the Sony-sanctioned remix of "Wanna," featuring Akon, pops onto the Hot 100 at No. 81.

You'd call this "synergy" if it weren't just an amazing coincidence. Rihanna is on Island/Def Jam, whose übermachers aren't exactly interested in assisting Sony-BMG with its promotional priorities. Jackson's label just got incredibly lucky.

Add to that the fact that "Don't" probably should've been a hit months ago. Originally slated as the third single from Good Girl Gone Bad—the video debuted on BET last July, and it topped charts across Europe last fall—"Don't" was bumped at the last minute in the U.S. for the Ne-Yo ballad "Hate That I Love You." Frankly, "Don't" is so mind-bogglingly catchy, it probably should've been the second single, following up the monster "Umbrella"; it has already out-charted both "Hate" (peak: No. 7) and second single "Shut Up and Drive" (peak: No. 15). Weirdly, it's as if the album's second-largest hit was held back to benefit Michael.

Which it wasn't. But if Mr. Jackson knows what's good for him, he'll pay a respectful visit to Rihanna's row at the Grammys and follow up with a crater-load of fruit baskets.

Here's a quick rundown of the rest of this week's charts:

• No, you're not imagining it—Flo Rida's "Low" really is following you everywhere. After six weeks at No. 1 and more than 2.2 million digital downloads, the song's had one small handicap: radio. Alicia Keys' "No One" wouldn't budge from the top of the Hot 100 Airplay chart, but after 14 weeks, her inescapable ballad finally cedes the top spot. Now, "Low" is officially the most-played song in America—like you didn't already suspect that.

• It took more than three months, but Britney Spears' "Piece of Me" is finally a Top 20 single: up three spots to No. 18. And that's based on sales and airplay that came before the latest law enforcement-assisted hospitalization. Next week: Top 10?

• Lupe Fiasco has his first Top 40 hit with "Superstar" (feat. Matthew Santos), up a whopping 24 spots to No. 36. First blogger to cry "sellout" wins...

• Foo Fighters kinda-sorta defeat Linkin Park on this week's Modern Rock chart. It looked like last week's No. 2, LP's U2 homage "Shadow of the Day," would be the song to evict Seether's "Fake It" from No. 1, but instead the Foos' "Long Road to Ruin" sneaks up to No. 2 and is poised to take the top rung. Seether has been No. 1 on Modern Rock for six weeks and on Mainstream Rock for (no joke) 13.

• Speaking of Modern Rock, in case you've got any remaining doubts about just how sleepy this format has become, last week Rise Against set a new record for slowest climb into the Top 10. "The Good Left Undone" reached the... um, winners' circle in its 30th chart week. It creamed the previous record-holder: 2006's "All the Same" by Sick Puppies took a mere 25 weeks to make the Top 10.

• On the R&B/Hip-Hop chart, there's a race of divas raring to evict Alicia Keys from No. 1, and Keyshia Cole has the edge, up one to No. 2. (You can tell both it and Mary J. Blige's "Just Fine" are hot on R&B radio, because they knock J. Holiday's "Suffocate" down to No. 4 from No. 2, even though the latter is gaining in strength and has a bullet.)

• The R&B/Hip-Hop song that won't die is Justin Timberlake's "Until the End of Time." It just fell out of the Top 10 last week after 20 weeks in there (it debuted last April and peaked at No. 3 back in October), and this week it's back up one notch to No. 13. Never underestimate urban radio programmers' love for an old-school slow jam.

• Finally, the top Ringtone is Henry Mancini's "Pink Panther Theme." It retakes No. 1 from Soulja Boy's "Crank That," after about five months of kids letting their phones Superman that ho.

Top 10s
Last week's position and total weeks charted in parentheses:

Hot 100
1. Flo Rida feat. T-Pain, "Low" (LW No. 1, 14 weeks)
2. Alicia Keys, "No One" (LW No. 2, 21 weeks)
3. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 4, 9 weeks)
4. Timbaland feat. OneRepublic, "Apologize" (LW No. 3, 26 weeks)
5. Rihanna, "Don't Stop the Music" (LW No. 7, 10 weeks)
6. Fergie, "Clumsy" (LW No. 5, 16 weeks)
7. Sean Kingston, "Take You There" (LW No. 8, 13 weeks)
8. Snoop Dogg, "Sensual Seduction" (LW No. 11, 9 weeks)
9. Sara Bareilles, "Love Song" (LW No. 10, 13 weeks)
10. Chris Brown feat. T-Pain, "Kiss Kiss" (LW No. 6, 20 weeks)

Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs
1. Alicia Keys, "Like You'll Never See Me Again" (LW No. 1, 14 weeks)
2. Keyshia Cole, "I Remember" (LW No. 3, 13 weeks)
3. Mary J. Blige, "Just Fine" (LW No. 4, 18 weeks)
4. J. Holiday, "Suffocate" (LW No. 2, 17 weeks)
5. Trey Songz, "Can't Help But Wait" (LW No. 6, 25 weeks)
6. Snoop Dogg, "Sensual Seduction" (LW No. 5, 12 weeks)
7. Webbie, Lil' Phat & Lil' Boosie, "Independent" (LW No. 7, 15 weeks)
8. Mario, "Cryin' Out for Me" (LW No. 11, 22 weeks)
9. Chris Brown, "With You" (LW No. 9, 9 weeks)
10. Flo Rida feat. T-Pain, "Low" (LW No. 10, 19 weeks)

Hot Country Songs
1. Brad Paisley, "Letter to Me" (LW No. 1, 16 weeks)
2. Rascal Flatts, "Winner at a Losing Game" (LW No. 2, 16 weeks)
3. Gary Allan, "Watching Airplanes" (LW No. 7, 28 weeks)
4. Billy Ray Cyrus with Miley Cyrus, "Ready, Set, Don't Go" (LW No. 8, 27 weeks)
5. Montgomery Gentry, "What Do Ya Think About That" (LW No. 3, 28 weeks)
6. Taylor Swift, "Our Song" (LW No. 5, 24 weeks)
7. Rodney Atkins, "Cleaning This Gun (Come on in Boy)" (LW No. 10, 19 weeks)
8. Keith Urban, "Everybody" (LW No. 6, 23 weeks)
9. Kenny Chesney with George Strait, "Shiftwork" (LW No. 9, 15 weeks)
10. Sugarland, "Stay" (LW No. 4, 20 weeks)

Hot Modern Rock Tracks
1. Seether, "Fake It" (LW No. 1, 22 weeks)
2. Foo Fighters, "Winner at a Losing Game" (LW No. 3, 14 weeks)
3. Linkin Park, "Shadow of the Day" (LW No. 2, 17 weeks)
4. Foo Fighters, "The Pretender" (LW No. 4, 26 weeks)
5. Paramore, "crushcrushcrush" (LW No. 8, 11 weeks)
6. Serj Tankian, "Empty Walls" (LW No. 5, 20 weeks)
7. Avenged Sevenfold, "Almost Easy" (LW No. 7, 17 weeks)
8. Chevelle, "I Get It" (LW No. 6, 28 weeks)
9. Finger Eleven, "Paralyzer" (LW No. 9, 50 [yes, 50!] weeks)
10. Rise Against, "The Good Left Undone" (LW No. 10, 31 weeks)

And in a special 50th anniversary moment, Rihanna will perform with the Time, which is reuniting for the occasion.

ZOMG. If this means a live version of "Don't Stop The Music," then it will totally make all of the agonizing pauses and flubbed transitions and cringeworthy ad libbing totally worth it. Okay, it won't at all, but still: the Time!

Beyonce, Rihanna, Underwood Performing At Grammys [Billboard]

The-Dream is cribbing a little from his own synth-riff fakebook here, but at least he's forced to drop the "6:15 I be kicking her out" shtick for something a little more wistful and human(e). Given my affection for Rihanna duets, I might be overrating it a little, but if not an "Umbrella"-grade smash, it would certainly light up the dreary first-quarter singles market with a proper video.

The-Dream feat. Rihanna - "Living A Lie" [YouTube]

By now you've seen the critics' lists of the year's best music. But what about the folks who really count—the people? In interest of fairness and balance, I've decided to take the critics' choices to some regular folks. That's right: it's time once again for this column to exploit my family.

This time around, I played the 2007 Idolator Pop Critics Poll's Top 10 Tracks for my mom, my sisters, and my sister's friend who always comes over on major holidays. The listening session took place at my sister Brittany's apartment in Bloomington, Minnesota, on Christmas Eve, shortly after dinner and gifts (opening everything the night before is a longstanding family tradition). Also around were my sisters' very tolerant significant others, Brittany's daughter Veronica, and plenty of delicious leftovers. As usual, I typed everyone's responses on the fly and occasionally paused the songs to fill in gaps.

Dramatis Personae:
Lorie, mother, age 47; listens to Christmas music
Michael, author, age 32; listens to the Marc Anthony best-of Brittany got him for Christmas
Alex, sister, age 22; kicks everyone's ass at Guitar Hero III
Brittany, sister, age 21; listens to the M.I.A. and Billie Holiday CDs Michael got her for Christmas
Cherrelle, Brittany's best friend, age 21; listens to her Kanye West ringtone

1. Rihanna ft. Jay-Z, "Umbrella" (Def Jam) [117 votes]
Alex: You know this song, Veronica?
Brittany: She sings it all the time. Is it this version that's No. 1?
Michael: This is the main version.
Lorie: Is there any versions without rap?
Michael: No.
Lorie: [frowns]
Brittany: Would you dance to it, Mom?
Lorie: I can't dance to anything.
Alex: She can probably dance better than she can sing.
Brittany: She could probably play rugby better than she sings.
Alex: She used to put on—what was it, Mom?
Lorie: A show?
Brittany: Wilson Phillips!
Alex: And she used to sing into her bedpost: "Hold on for one more day . . . "
Lorie: Are you sure I was singing and not screaming? I was pole dancing.
Brittany: I'll scream if you say anything like that again.
[The stereo we are listening on is connected to the TV, on which a commercial for itt-tech.edu is airing]
Lorie: Is this the video? People performing surgery? I thought maybe instead of the little drapes they put over you they were using umbrellas now.
Brittany: Are you retarded, Mom?

2. LCD Soundsystem, "All My Friends" (Capitol) [89 votes]
Brittany: This reminds me of Schroeder—it kind of sounds like the Snoopy theme.
Michael: This is a song by LCD Soundsystem called "All My Friends."
Brittany: I wish I had a song about all my friends.
Alex: It'd be over by now.
Brittany: Michael, can you pass me that wine so I can drink my pain away?
Lorie: Good music. You couldn't hardly dance to it, though, could you? I could tell you what you could do to it, but not too many people could.
Alex: Not with you.
Lorie: No, by yourself!
Brittany: I think she's talking about cross-stitching. At least I hope so.
Michael: I'm surprised you guys like this so much; I thought the piano might turn you off. The song is basically about getting too old to party.
Alex: [immediately] No such thing!
Brittany: This is Alex's theme song in 10 years.
Lorie: It was my theme song 10 years ago.
Brittany: Fifty.
Alex: I want people to get drunk and karaoke at my funeral.
Brittany: [after talking to her boyfriend, who is from Mexico] Miguel thinks it's nice, too, and he doesn't speak English. [Author's note: He does too.] You know the twins on Peanuts who just jump? They could dance to this.
Lorie: I hope they play this at midnight mass tonight.
Michael: Why?
Lorie: So I can stay awake.

3. M.I.A., "Paper Planes" (Interscope) [66 votes]
Brittany: I've heard this. It's familiar. [The vocal comes in. Brittany holds up her just-unwrapped copy of Kala] It's her.
Lorie: I've heard this before.
Brittany: Where have you heard this?
Lorie: I've been listening to the radio. [chorus comes in] I wanna go to a bar!
Brittany: Is that what this reminds you of? The gunfire reminds you of the bars you go to? [turns attention back to music] I really like this. But it's so much different than, like, "Bucky Done Gun." You say you like this album more? But the last album was really different. She's more singing than shouting. Is she trying to be more mainstream? I think I could listen to this for longer periods of time if it's all like this. Miguel, how do you like this? The gunshot [in the chorus] reminds you of the border, doesn't it?

4. Amy Winehouse, "Rehab" (Republic) [60 votes]
Lorie: All right, hey! This is the suicidal one [Veronica] sings!
Brittany: No, that's Sean Kingston.
Lorie: Oh, I remember this song now. What happened to her?
Brittany: She's fucked up beyond words. This is kind of Christmassy. All the dysfunctional families can relate to this one at Christmas. [after the line, "I don't ever want to drink again"] You know, if drinking makes her sing like this, she should go ahead. I feel sorry for her, though. She has a lot of underlying issues, and it's so evident.

5. Justice, " D.A.N.C.E." (Vice) [54 votes]
Lorie: This sounds like the beginning of Romper Stomper Romper Room. You ever heard of that?
Michael: Sort of. Romper Room was the kids' show, and Romper Stomper is a movie about racist skinheads in Australia.
Brittany: I thought it sounded like schoolchildren but you brought that into a whole other light, didn't you, Mom? It's like "Rock with You," in the beat. They should put this on Dance Dance Revolution. That would be fun times.
Cherrelle: Romper Room sounds like a porno. This reminds me of the Jackson 5. I could listen to this, definitely.
Brittany: This would be fun to dance to . . .
Cherrelle: . . . If I was drunk.
Brittany: And you're drunk all the time!
Cherrelle: I should just start dancing.

6. Peter Bjorn & John, "Young Folks" (Almost Gold) [50 votes]
Lorie: Oh, I love this! [whistles along]
Brittany: How do you know this and I don't?
Michael: Where have you heard this?
Lorie: I heard it at work. I love that whistle part. It just grabs you right away.
Michael: This came out last year internationally, and did well on last year's poll, but it was released in America this year, which is why it placed again. It was a big crossover hit—Kanye West rhymed over it on a mixtape.
Cherrelle: Now, why do you wanna ruin a perfectly fine piece of music like this? He's been stepping out of his realm with that Daft Punk stuff.
Brittany: He's been taking a flying leap out of his realm with that.
Alex: I've heard this song before.
Brittany: Where did you hear it?
Alex: I don't remember.
Michael: It's a group called Peter Bjorn & John. They're Swedish.
Cherrelle: [to Alex] Well then, maybe you heard it at Ikea.

6. Battles, "Atlas" (Warp) [50 votes]
Brittany and Alex: [immediately] "The beautiful people, the beautiful people."
Brittany: It is! It totally is.
Michael: It's not.
Brittany: I hate to disagree with you, Michael. I didn't know Marilyn Manson was still making records. [vocals come in] They're singing it backwards; they're putting in subliminal satanic messages. We could do a ouija board to this.
Cherrelle: I couldn't listen to this alone. I'd need to turn all the lights in the house on. Let's have a séance. This is what Marilyn Manson makes love to.
Brittany: These are probably his kids. Hey, Alex, come over here and let me carve a pentagram into your arm.
[Lorie, in kitchen, drops a cake on her foot]
Brittany: See? This music fucked her up so bad she dropped a cake on the floor.
Alex: [growling] "Red rum. Red rum."
Brittany: Did you just say you were going to spin your head in a circle?
Michael: So, do you guys like this?
Brittany: I like it on Halloween.
Lorie: [calling in from kitchen] I'm scared to fucking death of this song!

8. UGK ft. OutKast, "Int'l Players Anthem (I Choose You)" (Jive) [49 votes]
[Michael restarts the song a couple times so the group can hear the first verse]
Cherrelle: He sounds like he's trying to be a pimp.
Michael: Sort of—-it's called "Int'l Players Anthem." But Andre 3000's verse is about getting married.
Brittany: Is he going to marry me? That's all I care about.
Cherrelle: I don't love that old crap in the background. It's like '60s gospel that my mother would listen to.
Brittany: I think that's your mother singing in the background.
[Second verse begins]
Cherrelle: I like how he's talking about marrying someone and saying "bitch" and "pussy."
Brittany: They're gonna get "bitch" and "pussy" engraved on their wedding rings.
Cherrelle: I like this guy's voice.
Michael: This is Pimp C, who recently died.
Cherrelle: Well, how you gonna hate on a dead man?
Michael: OK, this is Big Boi now.
Cherrelle: They're both tiny men.
Michael: Big Boi is much smaller than Andre.
Cherrelle: [to Brittany] Andre could wear your clothes.
Brittany: I'd let him. He can wear my clothes anytime.
Cherrelle: This is all starting to sound alike to me.
Brittany: [to Cherrelle, who's black] Racist.

9. Feist, "1234" (Cherrytree) [48 votes]
Brittany: [immediately, to opening strums] "The beautiful people . . . "
Alex: This is the video with all the kids all skipping rope. [imitates choreography]
Brittany: [after the line, "Teenage hopes arrive at your door"] "Teenage hoes"?
Cherrelle: She keeps saying "ho."
Brittany: Very Christmassy.
Cherrelle: [sings] "1-2-3-4, you a ho."
Brittany: [sings] "5-6-7-8, your momma's a ho too/9-10-11-12, your grandma's a ho, too."
Cherrelle: If we weren't so mean, this would probably be a nice song.
Brittany: If we weren't so fucking cynical, we could enjoy this. If we hadn't just listened to Marilyn Manson . . .

10. Kanye West, "Stronger" (Roc-a-Fella/Def Jam) [35 votes]
Brittany and Cherrelle: [immediately] "Intergalactic, planetary, planetary, intergalactic . . . "
Cherrelle: I love this song.
Michael: Based on what you said earlier, I thought you didn't like it.
Brittany: No, I said I thought he took a flying leap out of his realm.
Michael: I misunderstood, then.
Cherrelle: Yeah, this is my ringtone.
Brittany: [deadpan] And that says a lot. You've really got to be a hardcore fan to have someone's song for a ringtone. And everybody turns around and says, "Hey, 'Stronger'! Let me holla at you!" [to Cherrelle] Does this ringtone make you stronger?
Cherrelle: [sardonically] I feel empowered. [song continues for awhile] I felt bad when his mom died.
Lorie: You know recently I just took a day off when my father's wife died.
Brittany: You know what's a big factor of why I don't like this song? Those awful fucking sunglasses with the blinds. They look retarded.
Cherrelle: You look like you have Down's Syndrome when you have them.
Brittany: Camp Courage sunglasses. [to Michael] Don't put that in there.
Michael: Can I please?
Brittany: If I get shanked for this, Michael, it's your fault.
Lorie: If you get shanked for this, I get a day off!

"Hate That I Love You" popped up like a tender mercy or urban radio this year, sandwiched between skeezy/silly-ass/sad sensitivity like "Soulja Girl" and "Shawty Is A Ten," but I also found myself daydreaming about a chart-hungry emo band or a conservative Nashville act playing the song straight for a hit of their own, their producers not even needing to musically fiddle with the master tapes. That programming malleability may not fly with the snobs, and to be honest, the Sugarland clusterfuck cover of Beyonce's similarly strummy genre-trasher "Irreplaceable" on this year's American Music Awards and pop emo's general pass-agg ickiness probably prove that the divas should be the ones who stick to sticking it to scrubs/admitting to clinginess. Still, forget figuring out what to tag the backing, because what makes "Hate" great is far less difficult to nail down, i.e. it gets cars (or bars) full of heads swaying as they pretend to be the biggest P.Y.T.'s in contemporary pop serenading each other. (Killer karakoke tune as well, though you need to have a pretty... interesting relationship with your duet partner.) This became a late '07 sing-along anthem for me after a few heartbreak knocks and spending most of the year as an infamous "Umbrella" agnostic, and the sad way I still melt at that telegraphed high note after the breakdown makes me wonder if "mid-tempo R&B with the kind of cheddary acoustic guitars I'd never put up with in a rock tune" is a musical soft spot I just never knew about until 2006.

Rihanna feat. Ne-Yo - "Hate That I Love You" [YouTube]
Idolator's 2007 Top 40 List Of Awesomeness

I loved "Umbrella" from pretty much the first time I heard it on my MacBook's tinny speakers, the way its minor-key bluster and I'll-stand-by-you lyrics were propped up by some deeply buried synths that sounded like they'd been coated in mud that had been collecting for weeks. Little did I know then that "Umbrella" would become a pop cultural juggernaut, with the "ella, ella, ella, ay, ay, ay"; the seemingly lazy Jay-Z intro that proved itself to be crucial (the Jay-free AC mix of the song sounded unfinished, naked even); the not-half-bad but superfluous Chris Brown remix; and the weird parallels that my brain drew between the track and "Rock Me Amadeus." (No, really.) But even though it's been hated on by some, and even though 2007 was a year that was chiefly marked by my patience being worn thin by everyone—blog bands, bloggers, bands with bloggers in them, OneRepublic, Timbaland, Nicole Scherzinger's endless attempts to come out with a "first single" from her perpetually delayed album—"Umbrella" was my always-one-dial-flip-away security blanket, a song that I could rely on whether I was spending my days staring into a monitor or staring out a car window. The one irony of it being so omnipresent is that I'd probably have placed it higher on my personal end-of-year list if it'd, say, stalled out at No. 20 on the pop charts and faded from the radio around mid-July. But I guess that also ties into a larger thread about music in 2007, and how the fact that it was within arm's reach—not to mention free!—at all times led to it being slightly devalued. So maybe the fact that it's No. 20 on our list does mean that it's song of the year, although I suspect that my saying so will inspire howls of protest from my cohort. [No doubt. — Sen. Ed.]

Rihanna - Umbrella [YouTube]
Rihanna [MySpace]
Idolator's 2007 Top 40 List Of Awesomeness

I'm probably going to get stoned by the peanut gallery for saying that ubiquity has led me to really dislike this song, so I can imagine how the besieged people of drizzly Great Britain must feel. But even confirmed haters have to be pulling for "Umbrella" to take out Bryan Adams' "(Everything I Do) I Do It For You," which blighted the planet for a small eternity in 1991, spending 16 weeks at No. 1 in the U.K. (The all-time champ, jazz crooner Frankie "Old Leather Lungs" Laine's "I Believe," squatted the top of the pops for 18 weeks in 1953. And I got no problems with a guy named "Old Leather Lungs.")

Rihanna Achieves U.K. Chart Landmark [NME]

Rihanna, Good Girl Gone Bad
The artist: Barbados cover girl with a seemingly tireless album-release schedule.
The sound: Crunchy, futuristic radio-pop.
The first in line: Chart followers looking for another track to add to their "Summer Jams Of '07" playlist.

Big & Rich, Between Raising Hell And Amazing Grace
The artist: Country duo that's just finding out about this hot trend called "crunk."
The sound: A ride around Nashville that picks up AC/DC and Wyclef along the way.
The first in line: Good old boys, the bad girls who love to ride 'em, and curious John Legend aficionados.

Paul McCartney, Memory Almost Full
The artist: Former Beatle plunging into the digital/Starbucks era.
The sound: One of the songs is titled "Ever Present Past"; that sort of sums up the feel of the album, 21st-century distribution methods aside.
The first in line: A harried vice-president with a latte jones.

Poison, Poison'd
The artist: Hard rock stalwarts who somehow managed to survive the Capitol-Virgin merger.
The sound: Lipstick-kissed covers of Bowie, Kiss, and The Cars.
The first in line: Rocklahoma road-trippers.

T-Pain, Epiphany
The artist: Drank-buyin', stripper-lovin' flirt.
The sound: Vocodered, airy R & B.
The first in line: VIP-room DJs looking for post-last-call fodder.

On The CD Front [Pause & Play]

Rihanna - Shut Up And Drive [MP3, link expired]
Rihanna - Say It [MP3, link expired]

Rihanna - Umbrella [YouTube, via Popjustice]
Rihanna [MySpace]

Ne-Yo - Make It Work [MP3, link removed; via Kevipod Music]
Rihanna featuring Ne-Yo - Hate That I Love You [MP3, link removed; via Concreteloop]

Rihanna feat. Jay-Z - Umbrella [MP3, link removed]
Rihanna [MySpace]