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Posts Tagged “Wtf”

stay classy

Justin Timberlake Wants You To Use That Hole In That Box For Something Else


It's been almost two years since Justin Timberlake donned a pair of Color Me Badd pants and sang about giving his ladyfriend a Very Special Christmas Box, which I guess means that enough time has passed for "Dick In A Box" to become source material for a song about Very Important Things. Above, Timberlake (with girlfriend Jessica Biel) turns his ode to giving the best present of all into... a song about sticking your ballot into that hole in that box. Unfortunately, pretty Christmas wrapping, Andy Samberg, and the concept of "being funny through something besides extreme awkwardness on Timberlake's part" are nowhere to be seen, so why not clear your brain out with the original, which we've placed after the jump. More »

Authorities were called in after the body of Ola Brunkert, drummer for pop giants Abba, was discovered in his Spanish garden over the weekend, but rather than uncovering foul play, they learned that Brunckert had merely "hit his head against a glass door in his dining room, shattering the glass and cutting himself in the neck. He managed to wrap a towel around his neck and left the house to seek help, but collapsed in the garden." He was 62. [AP/Photo: AP]

Attention fans of outdoor summertime concerts/the global overpopulation epidemic: "Passes to a festival of their choice will be offered to any donors in Europe who contribute to Ireland's sperm reserves." Alas, virile young Bonnaroo attendees, the offer extends to overseas fests only, but a few more donated pints, a choice Travelocity deal, and you're on your way to a muddy field somewhere in the EU. [NME/HT: Camilo Muñoz]

As it turns out, the spate of leak-blog deletions that I reported yesterday isn't the result of Mariah Carey's people coming down hard—it's the fallout from a leak-blog war where, as Crazy World Of Music's Vicki describes it, "The blog gets hacked and I had to change my password for 4 hours yesterday... [Some dude named Kevin is] coming back on March 10 but his blog sucks and won't be #1 since he's the one who's behind hacking this blog and shutting other blog down so he can be #1 in the blog world. Well, get a clue you won't be #1 BUT you ruin a lot of good sites on the way cause you are jealous of them. No, he's NOT Kevi-ipods, its a 12 year old Kevin who's immature.... mine got hacked but the other ones got reported by Kevin and his "friends" for no reason. Yea its stupid but his blog won't be #1 at all." And now Vicki is coming back on March 17! Whew. This all sounds like the plot to a movie that would culminate in a dance war—of course, that dance war would have to be in Second Life, but at least it would have a bleeding-edge-of-pop soundtrack to make up for that awkwardness. [Crazy World Of Music]

wtf

Britney Spears Drops New Single, Falls Even Further Into Post-Post-Postmodern Hell

A new Britney Spears song just premiered on Ryan Seacrest's soon-to-be-nationwide radio show, and for some reason Britney, who still has a whole album's worth of good dance-pop tunes to release to radio, is now lowering herself to duet with that chick from The Hills who made the really crummy music video a few weeks back. The song, "Dramatic," doesn't sound like a "duet" as much as it sounds like "Heidi Montag singing over a half-finished Britney song that someone left behind at the studio," which lends some credence to Dan's theory that it could a leaked track from Jive Records' forthcoming Britney Spears - Duets collaboration. But I think it's just Britney trying to hitch her wagon to that of a fellow tabloid star, thus proving that she's the ultimate 21st-century fameball, someone who knows that the only way her Google News hits will go up is by forming some sort of silicone-and-spray-tan Wondertwin alliance with her counterparts from Us' table of contents. [KIISFM.com]

wtf

Lil Jon's Winery: Really?

A few gossip blogs are claiming that Little Jonathan Winery is actually the brainchild of one Lil Jon, so get out your pimp cups, etc., etc. Now, it's nothing new for musicians to head into the grape fields in search of new revenue streams (especially given all the problems Jon's label, TVT, has been having lately), but I have a nagging suspicion that this "discovery" is actually the result of some reading-comprehension-challenged blogger in need of an easy joke for the purpose of propping up pageviews. (OK, OK, it's the whole easiness of the "LOL he spelled out Little and his name!! LOL" joke that's really doing it for me.) Feel free to speculate as to whether or not this wine is actually legit, but I'm personally going to hold out until noted vintner Maynard James Keenan weighs in before I go making any orders for cases. [Official site via ONTD]


A sign that the "celebrity" DJ trend is not only scraping the bottom of the barrel, it's oozing through the barrel's slats and onto the gum-studded pavement surrounding it reached my inbox this morning: "Amy Fisher is back and will be hitting the turntables as a guest DJ, Friday January 4, 2008 at 10pm at 513 W28th Street in Manhattan. Ms Fisher will be joined by NYC Club Guru 'JE' Englebert. The controversial sex video which Amy Fisher is featured will be displayed their [SIC FOR THE LOVE OF GOD]." As I said to the tipster who passed along this news: I wonder if any of the actresses who portrayed the former newspaper columist in those TV movies will show up? Surely Noelle Parker isn't up to much these days.

Speaking of Alvin & The Chipmunks, did you know that, I guess thanks to that movie being out, there is a whole cottage YouTube industry devoted to posting "Chipmunk versions" of popular songs? And that people out there are so bored, someone actually requested that the Chipmunk treatment be given to "I Love U" by the newly minted "bisexual" "celebrity" Tila Tequila? It's things like this that make me hope for a very large upswing in manufacturing jobs, because clearly a lot of people out there have way too much time. Or too-high marketing budgets. Or both! [YouTube]

wtf

This Whole B2K Thing Is Getting Weirder And Weirder

Earlier this afternoon, our post about Raz B's half-hearted denial of his earlier allegations that his former manager, Chris Stokes, forced him and his bandmates in B2K (shown here in, uh, "happier" times) into orgies and other sex games—and the possibility that said denial could in fact serve as the denoument to this sordid affair—garnered this comment from a reader:

This story is sooo not over. Now Raz B's brother is saying that the LA Crips gang forced his brother to say those things at gunpoint and Raz B has been missing for 2 days. The whole thing is wild, just wild.

I thought that the commenter was joking, but both stories actually came straight from Raz B's brother, a.k.a. Ricky Romance, via the gossip site Bossip, which is apparently doing further legwork on that side of the story. Meanwhile, people claiming to be Raz B and his management have taken to their MySpace bulletins, as a reader of Oh No They Didn't found out:

More »

"Video tapes of an international rap contest with a $50,000 grand prize were stolen this weekend, and are now being held ransom, according to the organizer of the two-year-old contest who sold his home in London to raise the prize money. ... [contest founder Harold] Anthony added, 'This has kind of taught us that maybe $50,000 is too much money for a rap battle. Maybe we should just keep the prize money on the same kind of level as normal rap battles, which is two grand, or three grand.'" [New York Observer]



wtf

Who Knew That You Could Tango To Fall Out Boy?

I'll admit that I'm pretty much unaware of Dancing With The Stars beyond the fact that it pulls in boatloads of viewers, although this clip—in which Jennie Garth and Derek Hough do, indeed, engage in a rigorous tango to the strains of "The Take Over, The Break's Over"—is making me think that it's for the best. More »

fools and their foolishness

Man Lays His Hands On Hannah's Hardbody ... For Six Days

Do you have 144 hours to spare and an unquenchable desire to see Miley Cyrus in person? If you were in Tampa, Fla., you could have taken on 35-year-old Jody Powell in yet another contest designed to give away tickets to a Hannah Montana concert to the person most willing to take a lot of time off of work for unexplained "personal reasons": More »

videodrone

The t.A.T.u. Movie: It May Actually Not Be As Good As "Can't Stop The Music"


Some clips from Finding t.A.T.u., the upcoming "music, Internet chatrooms and hedonistic Russian nightlife"-filled flick about two fans of the Russian duo who meet via the Internet, leaked online today, and from the looks of things this film isn't quite going to reach the heights of the "All About Us" video: Not only do we get to see Mischa Barton working in a slaughterhouse and a scene where a bunch of seedy guys catcall Barton as she sits on the side of the road, the axiom "Fuck everything but t.A.T.u. They're nihilists. Beautiful nihilists." is both uttered and typed into a BlackBerry, thus reminding viewers that this tale of fandom gone wrong is, in fact, taking place in 2007.At least the soundtrack should be good, right?

Finding t.A.T.u. preview [YouTube, via ONTD]
Earlier: t.A.T.u., The Movie: This Will Be Almost As Awesome As "Can't Stop The Music"

star maps

"Slate" Helpfully Provides Potential Stephen Malkmus Stalkers With Map Of Indie Luminaries' Homes

Today Slate ran a piece on why Portland, Ore., is like omg so awesome because of its impeccable indie cred, which is apparently epitomized by bands moving there once they've hit it medium. "It's easy to live here," says author Taylor Clark, although how easy that might be there will probably change at least a bit for the artists whose dwellings are pointed out in Clark's Tour Of the Indie Rock Star' Homes: More »

wtf

Lyle Lovett Has Destroyed Our Thinkin' Brains

Lyle Lovett has recorded the theme song to the awful-looking upcoming musical satire Walk Hard: The Legend Of Dewey Cox with the help of Jewel, Jackson Browne, and ... Ghostface Killah. (Somewhere my pal John's throat just clenched without knowing why.) The brief description of said song in this Rolling Stone interview has rendered me momentarily ... something: More »